Advice..... New Girlfriend !!!

Anonymous

Well-known member
well first of all i just want to say hello to everyone and happy new year. I desperatly need advice on something, and what better place to ask than here. Well this is my story. I recently went to Mexico to my parents hometown. The time i was their, my mom introduced me to a girl, well soon after, we hit it off, started dacing, and talking about everything.This went on for a couple of days until we became a "couple". After two weeks or so, she went back to her hometown which is Baja California, and i came back to San Antonio. She gave me her phone # so i called her, but at that time i wasn't shure what we where, so i talked very very seriously with her and we made our relationship permanent "even dought we r 2 far apart". Shes my girlfriend now !!, but this is what worries me: first of all shes older than me by five years, and as you can imagine shes very outgoing, and shes a teacher for elementry kids in Baja, this worries me because im afraid that if our relationship goes on to be more than just boyfriend and girlfriend, im afraid of meeting her parents, her friends and be a part of her life. I feel like i dont deserve her because she has a career and doing so good in life ,and i just have a lame job due to my SA. i simply feel worth less when im with her, in some ways i envy her. but the thing is that i really really feel with all of my heart that i do love her and to be honest i havent felt this for any other girl i've been with, and i feel like she is the one. When i talk to her i just feel like the world doesnt matter to me only being with her. but im afraid that when i meet her friends and relatives, and they see how nervous i am, they r gonna think im not good 4 her. and all of this is because of this thing that is messing up my life and the people i want to be with. SOME ADVICE!!!!
 

Remus

Moderator
Staff member
I'd be open with her about your SA

two things then can happen

a) she can dump you (and prove she wasnt worthy of your affections)
b) she will support you (and prove she is worthy)

relationships are about honesty, its best to be honest and open about eveything
 

Anonymous

Well-known member
daaaamm, lol, i knew u were gonna say that, that is very very hard to do but ill probably tell her the truth and ur right if shes worth it shell be with me no matter what. THANKS ALOT!!!! but it would be hard to do
 

Anonymous

Well-known member
daaaamm, lol, i knew u were gonna say that, that is very very hard to do but ill probably tell her the truth and ur right if shes worth it shell be with me no matter what. THANKS ALOT!!!! but it would be hard to do
 

tommydog

Well-known member
ummm

seperate from the anxiety issue ...

do you really think a long distance relationship is going to work out ? Im not saying dont take a chance .. im just saying maybe you should think about it realistically .. and realise what might happen thats all
 

Remus

Moderator
Staff member
I had one that worked for three years, if you love each other things work out
 

LilMissTragic

Well-known member
If its love and you make her happy then i'm sure her family will be happy about her finding such a nice man. I think its all most parents wish for..to see thier daughter with a decent, dependable type of man/woman.
 

Harleyq

Well-known member
You can't hide the SA from her forever. It'll rear it's ugly little head sometime. Unfortunately, SA isn't one of those subtle disorders. I think you might as well just tell her now. If she doesn't support you, she's not really a good match for you, anyways. And if she does support you, then it'll be easier on both of you. She'll know right away why you are the way you are, instead of having to find out gradually and wonder why you're so easily tensed up about social situations. Believe me - I made the mistake of not telling my bf about my anxiety problems and it almost ruined our relationship because I was difficult and neurotic when he wanted me to talk to family and friends and he didn't know why.
 

Noca

Banned
You can't hide the SA from her forever. It'll rear it's ugly little head sometime. Unfortunately, SA isn't one of those subtle disorders. I think you might as well just tell her now. If she doesn't support you, she's not really a good match for you, anyways. And if she does support you, then it'll be easier on both of you. She'll know right away why you are the way you are, instead of having to find out gradually and wonder why you're so easily tensed up about social situations. Believe me - I made the mistake of not telling my bf about my anxiety problems and it almost ruined our relationship because I was difficult and neurotic when he wanted me to talk to family and friends and he didn't know why.

It was over 4 years ago when he made this post. Chances are hes not still with this gf lol
 

Harleyq

Well-known member
It was over 4 years ago when he made this post. Chances are hes not still with this gf lol

oops, lol! I saw this post in the "related posts" section of another thread and I guess I didn't look too closely at the date.

Well, if he is still with her and she doesn't know...he should tell her, lol.
 
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