Am I depressed?

Sometimes I think i'm depressed, but most of the time I'm usually a very happy person. Or I act that way. The only time I really feel like I'm depressed is when I am about to go to bed. I'll start thinking about everything. I just feel worthless. I can't get a job, and I'll never be able to help my dad out (who is 56 years old), with the bills. He doesn't even have a job right now, and I feel horrible that we are barely living when I could easily probably get a job. I've been missing a lot of school again, and it's barely the beginning of the year. I'm in 12th grade, and I REALLY don't want to drop out when I'm so close to graduating, but I think i'm going to end up doing it. I just don't see the point in graduating anyways. I'll never be able to get a job so what's the point? My classes make me too nervous. And I go out to eat with my friends for lunch everyday and her bf's brother is always there and he knows I think that he is cute, so I am ALWAYS super nervous when we go to eat. Plus, having to eat around him is HORRIBLE. I won't talk to him anymore because I'm too nervous and he wants to know why. My friend just told him I was shy. She is the only one who knows about my S.A. I just don't know what to do. I can't talk to my counsler at school. I have before and I'm sorry but she just doesn't understand. I already skipped school today. I think i'm going to drop out tomorrow. Sorry about the long paragraph btw.

Are you depressed?
Do you know the answer?
Yes. Sounds like it.

I really have no idea. This is an area others may help with more than I.

You may want to talk to someone besides your school counselor. It sounds like your core issue is your social phobia, and it is triggering some depressive thoughts. What I notice in your post is 'worthless' and a hopeless view of your future.

My social phobia and depression caused me to drop out of university. Looking back, I wish that I had known how to help myself, which would have been to seek the help of a mental health professional. I had no idea what I was dealing with at the time, none whatsoever, I just felt like a freak. I hope you reach out before another ten years go by and you are still in this state of mind