Anxiety/depression phases....

Angel_Of_Death

Well-known member
I've noticed personally that my social anxiety is sometimes worse than other times...I'm not exactly sure why. When I get anxiety it also seems that feeling depressed immediately follows.

For the past 2 days, my social anxiety has actually been higher and I've also at the same time felt really depressed. I guess I can point out exactly what caused me feeling this way, I had a 1 on 1 meeting with one of the managers at work, she's new, a milf, she's hot...and during our 20 minutes session I was extremely anxious, I'm sure she noticed...I had a shaky voice, was extremely nervous and was sweating like crazy. When I was done with the meeting I felt really bad because I had no reason to feel that way. It made me realize at that point how severe my (our) problem really is, and how it's gonna make me find a girlfriend almost impossible. I was so depressed after that I couldn't sleep at night and spent the whole time in tears.

Today I went to a friends house and drank alot...I've been using alcohol and marijuana as way of coping with the problem but I know it's not the solution.

I've also noticed on this site, that most people including myself just come here to rant about our problems. But there isn't much about solutions of getting passed and beating this damn freakin disease...

I just wish there would be something out there that could magically cure my social anxiety so i can freakin get on with my life.

I feel really depressed, sad and frustrated at the same time.
 

Lexmark

Well-known member
Yeah I think exposure is the only way aswell
Its hard to get exposure when you have no reason to leave the house though
Apart from that alcohol works but its obviously not the answer
 

Helyna

Well-known member
raylite said:
I just wish there would be something out there that could magically cure my social anxiety so i can freakin get on with my life.

- exposure

Exposure doesn't entirely work, or we'd all be over it. The best thing is CBT to help you handle exposure and think differently about it.
But exposure is necessary.
 

alex29

Well-known member
the solution is to be around people enough so that i feel comfortable. the problem is that being around people causes me all this depression to begin with .....
 

Angel_Of_Death

Well-known member
Facing the fears doesen't really fix the problem. Because the anxiety is still there next time, and you have to restart all over again. And whenever I manage to get trough some social situations, at the end I find myself completely exhausted.

I wish it were more simple. Some effective way, whether it be medication or some type of therapy which would guarantee being cured at the end. But by reading this forum, nobody really seems to have a definite answer to cure social phobia.

I get the feeling that most who have SA are stuck with the problem for the rest of their lives, and they have to find different solutions to "cope" with the problem. Maybe there are a few exceptions who have beaten the anxiety, I don't know.

Does anyone know where I can read on experiences of people who have cured their anxiety ? Atleast if I can convince myself that it IS POSSIBLE to cure the anxiety, I can keep the hope alive...
 

Helyna

Well-known member
Does anyone know where I can read on experiences of people who have cured their anxiety ? Atleast if I can convince myself that it IS POSSIBLE to cure the anxiety, I can keep the hope alive...

There are several on this site. You just have to keep your eyes open for a post explaining it. Several "Personal stories" are by people who are over it. Just... look around this and the internet. They're out there.

I fully believe (and should wear a sign saying) that the only way to get over severe social phobia is to get a good therapist who understands and go through CBT. I have only heard good things about it.
 

Lexmark

Well-known member
Angel_Of_Death said:
Facing the fears doesen't really fix the problem. Because the anxiety is still there next time, and you have to restart all over again. And whenever I manage to get trough some social situations, at the end I find myself completely exhausted.

I wish it were more simple. Some effective way, whether it be medication or some type of therapy which would guarantee being cured at the end. But by reading this forum, nobody really seems to have a definite answer to cure social phobia.

I get the feeling that most who have SA are stuck with the problem for the rest of their lives, and they have to find different solutions to "cope" with the problem. Maybe there are a few exceptions who have beaten the anxiety, I don't know.

Does anyone know where I can read on experiences of people who have cured their anxiety ? Atleast if I can convince myself that it IS POSSIBLE to cure the anxiety, I can keep the hope alive...

That is asuch a negative thread!
We have a fear and best way to get over it is facing it
 

Richey

Well-known member
Life happens. Shit happens. To everybody. And is it not a "comfort in wretchedness to have companions in woe?".

And each person has an untold multitude of people worse and better off than themselves. None of them are responsible for the shit that happens too them, but how they react to it, how they learn from it and how they grow from it is their own responsibility. As is their own happiness. Happiness is not a state, but a journey, and it's just as hard as every other road in life - you just get to win on the way.

One thing I know that is that one of the most important virtues to nurture, in order to get you through to the next paradigm, is hope. Train yourself to never abandon it, especially when you think that it's worthless or has already gone, when it feels most distant. All you have to do is remember it and hold on.

Whatever triggers fight in you is what's lacking now but its essential to find out so you don't just give up and stop, hence focussing on a nuerosis like something that is social anxiety day in day out while stopping you living the life you crave is the root to these woes, i see many people here tagging themselves with this SA label as if it defines their status which is distorting the truth of the condition, if you went out tommorrow and made two friends and decided to talk even if it hurts giving you enough confidence to keep the momentum then your not being chased by the same nuerosis that stopped you from acting the way you did before ....

your making progress in the right direction by telling yourself and informing your mind, and repeating the process that you are or are fast becoming the person you dreamed to become ...

the key to this is to persist and practice the art of whatever it is that drives you to be you
 

VioletTears

Well-known member
Angel of Death, I feel the same way as you... Some people with SA manage to avoid exposing themselves to the world, but most of us are forced to interact pretty much daily, whether through school/work/whatever... I have been teaching (kindergarten, 1st grade, now preschool) for 5 years and it still hasn't gotten any easier. I'm actually doing worse because the exposure has increased and the anxiety HASN'T decreased alongside it. I have just started meds and therapy for anxiety and depression during this past month though so I'll let you guys know if any of it helps... It might not be a bad idea for you to just try SOMETHING (therapy/self help books/meds if you want to go tht way) though... If nothing else it maybe offers a little hope.
 

longstrangetrip

New member
I know exactly how you feel. I try to do this when my anxiety is extremely high and inevitably causes some depression: I try to think about the times when my anxiety was low and tell myself that while I may not completely get a handle on this anxiety and depression that I too often feel, there's no reason to believe things won't get better at least for a while, and when they are, I should enjoy the reprieve to the best of my ability.
I try to stop comparing my life/social life to someone elses'. Mine is just different because of this thing. It's unfortunate that I can't be a 'social butterfly' and do all of these fun and interesting things and be surrounded by lots of fun and interesting people, but, at least for now, that's the way it is. I try to find coping strategies instead of obessing over some magical cure (not that I'm implying anyone here is obsessing over some magical cure, but I think we all wish there were one). For example, if I'm feeling depressed or anxious, I lose myself in a book or a guilty pleasure, something, anything that can distract me. Or, I come on message boards like this, and try to take as much comfort as I can that I'm not alone, and do the best I can to show compassion to others. That makes me feel at least a tiny bit useful.
Coping with the disorder doesn't always help ease the anxiety and depression that much (although sometimes it does), but it's a way to do what you can not to dwell too much on it, not to go too deeply in the abyss.
 

Raynor

Member
Im sorry butt i suffered with anxiety for years and weed is not the alternative!!!!, you need to seek help and get the rite meds or you are going to be deeper in ths sliprey slope that we are in... id STOP that rite now! you will only get worse!

Hope you get sorted...
 

Angel_Of_Death

Well-known member
Raynor said:
Im sorry butt i suffered with anxiety for years and weed is not the alternative!!!!, you need to seek help and get the rite meds or you are going to be deeper in ths sliprey slope that we are in... id STOP that rite now! you will only get worse!

Hope you get sorted...

I'm addicted to weed, although I don't consider myself a heavy smoker. I've considerably lowered the amount of weed I smoke in the past couple of months/weeks. Ultimately, I would like to stop smoking weed, but for now it's something that helps me cope with my problems...in a way.

Of course, smoking weed won't make my anxiety go away...it's far from that. When I smoke, I usually do it alone and avoid being in public. Sometimes when I am stressed, I'll drive up to the mountain in my city and will smoke a joint while having a beatiful view on the city. Or my favorite, I'll go near the airport in my city there is a spot where you can drive to and park your car and have a great view of planes take off. I enjoy doing that alot. Smoking near a lake is also another good spot.

I use weed in an environment that is relaxing. It helps to calm me down.
 

Len

Well-known member
Sorry to break the bad news A of D but weed is going to fuck with your head and you should stop now before you completely lose it.

Weed is scientifically proven to bring on mental illness and schizophrenia. I believe my mental health has been adversely affected by smoking weed.

Weed is not an addictive substance. If you smoke it with tobacco, however, then you are likely addicted to the tobacco.

Yes of course you feel relaxed smoking weed. That's because it relaxes you and makes you stoned. But it also makes you paranoid and affects your sense of reality.

It sounds like smoking weed is part of your lifestyle and that is part of why you enjoy it. But to quit you have to drastically change your lifestyle. Start doing excercise, go for a walk, learn a musical instrument or something.

I am sorry to sound harsh but if you smoke weed and join a social phobia forum then there is not much advice we can give you apart from GIVE UP THE WEED.
 
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