Anxiety when others are watching me, fail at everything I do

So today when I returned to job after some driving, some of coworkers where standig outside. When I came with the car, I saw they was looking at me. I had to park the car infront of them. Offcourse my first atempt failed. I almost hit another car, I didnt, but I was close. I tried several times, and couldnt manuever the car right. I got really nervous. I just had to give up, and parking looked really stupid. When I got out I quickly walked away, avoiding eye contact with anyone. I felt so stupid. And this is not only when parking. It's with everything I do, if I know someone is watching, I just can't do it right. I am so affraid to fail, my brain freeze, and I can't focus on what I'm doing.

I can park the car perfectly while noone is looking at me.

xnn said:

So today when I returned to job after some driving, some of coworkers where standing outside. When I came with the car, I saw they was looking at me. I had to park the car in front of them. Of course my first attempt failed. I almost hit another car, I didn't, but I was close. I tried several times, and couldn't maneuver the car right. I got really nervous. I just had to give up, and parking looked really stupid. When I got out I quickly walked away, avoiding eye contact with anyone. I felt so stupid. And this is not only when parking. It's with everything I do, if I know someone is watching, I just can't do it right. I am so afraid to fail, my brain freeze, and I can't focus on what I'm doing.

I can park the car perfectly while no one is looking at me.

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I'm the same. I perform terribly when others are watching. But if given a quiet and private environment, I tend to give near perfect results. It all comes down to our fear of being negatively judged. It's wired since childhood and I know it's hard to break out. I'd say, take a deep breath, relax, and do what you normally do. Don't beat yourself up over the bad memory of that incident, it'll only make you more anxious when the same thing happens next time. Seek out opportunities to perform in front of groups and participate (presentations, etc.). As you expose yourself to such situations, you'll get used to performing in front of others and you'll see the improvement in performance. Good luck!

^exactly. This is the fundamental question for those with anxiety. Is it wired since childhood? I think you might be right.

I used to be the same in my last two years at school. It can occur during childhood, or later in life. People like to think that you either functional straight out of the box like a computer or were defective during production. You are always in a state of change and anything can upset that process in either a positive or negative way. As I have observed over the years those who end up on places like this don't take bold steps to affect themselves in a positive way but are affected by everything outside of them. That can work, for a while. It really depends on who or what is around you. As per self-consciousness, something that worked for me was training myself to project a stronger presence; working on body language and speaking moe boldly. And then realizing that everyone around me felt the same things. I never used to see it, but now it's so clear. I can see how vulnerable we all are. Seeing that has helped me socially in that I don't feel like I am surrounded by giants so to speak. So as you can guess I advocate mental preparation and settling your mind on how things really are. When you 'get it', everything changes. When you understand that the opinions of others are just that, and ultimately of little to no real value, you can start living. Self-conscious meltdowns are just us sinking within ourselves because we feel that we are inadequate and are going to reap the judgment of others. Notice how confident people can make huge gaffs but brush it off, even though there may be a remnant who mock them. Because they know it doesn't matter; they don't care! You can never get over something like this until you readjust your estimation of yourself and that of other people. It requires a little balance. Just my humble thoughts, so take from it what you will

Learn to laugh at yourself and find ways to boost the part of you that's confident. Next time it happens, laugh it off and joke about it to your co-workers. Right now, while you're beating yourself up over what happened (something so small in the grand scheme of things), everyone else has already forgotten all about it.

Snap, I feel you. I tend to park way off in the distance if that's what it takes to avoid this kind of thing.