being congratulated for talking

LazyHermitCrab

LazyHermitCrab

Well-known member
It's hard to ever not be quiet, because when I do talk someone says, "good job you talked!" either then or later. Or someone will say "so and so said you actually talked and had something to say!" Even if I'm not in a quiet mood which is super rare I despise being congratulated for appearing "normal." If I were to just say whatever comes to my head that would make people uncomfortable and they would not always understand lol. Either that or make up crap to say to appeal to everyone and make things up which is draining. Anyone else??

P.S meant to say "congratulated" in the title x.x
 
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lilmutegirl

lilmutegirl

Well-known member
People often comment on me talking (well, not "often," since it is a rare occurrence lol). I get more attention by being quiet--basically, someone mentions me not talking, which causes everyone to look at me, making me feel like I have to talk (I was in a class in middle school, and the teacher said that nobody could talk till I did, and that was awkward--fortunately, it was a gifted class, and there were only 4 of us in there). I don't know that anyone has congratulated me on speaking, but they definitely take notice.
 
fate12321

fate12321

Well-known member
Yes, it has happen to me a few times. I remember someone in my high school once said, "Oh my gosh! You can talk", in a very surprised, sarcastic, tone of voice.
 
LazyHermitCrab

LazyHermitCrab

Well-known member
lilmutegirl said:
People often comment on me talking (well, not "often," since it is a rare occurrence lol). I get more attention by being quiet--basically, someone mentions me not talking, which causes everyone to look at me, making me feel like I have to talk (I was in a class in middle school, and the teacher said that nobody could talk till I did, and that was awkward--fortunately, it was a gifted class, and there were only 4 of us in there). I don't know that anyone has congratulated me on speaking, but they definitely take notice.
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Yeah that seems awkward... like I can talk when I want geez. Congrats in being in a gifted class. You must be very smart!! :)
 
Predacon

Predacon

Well-known member
I remember people saying that when I was a kid, depending on who said it I either felt annoyed or didn't care.
 
T

Tuukka40

Well-known member
Sorry to resurrect a somewhat old thread...

It actually reaaalllly embarrasses me when people say things like this and makes me avoid talking once I feel I have been deemed "quiet and shy" by a group.
But could it be that the majority of people just don't realize how much having SA sucks? People usually don't openly try to offend others, especially when it comes to their problems..
As in, I'm sure an overweight person probably doesn't get comments like "wow, you're actually eating a salad?"
Maybe people don't see others with SA as being such a bad thing, or else they wouldn't joke about it.

Just an idea...at least that is what I try to tell myself when these things occur!
 
LazyHermitCrab

LazyHermitCrab

Well-known member
Tuukka40 said:
Sorry to resurrect a somewhat old thread...

It actually reaaalllly embarrasses me when people say things like this and makes me avoid talking once I feel I have been deemed "quiet and shy" by a group.
But could it be that the majority of people just don't realize how much having SA sucks? People usually don't openly try to offend others, especially when it comes to their problems..
As in, I'm sure an overweight person probably doesn't get comments like "wow, you're actually eating a salad?"
Maybe people don't see others with SA as being such a bad thing, or else they wouldn't joke about it.

Just an idea...at least that is what I try to tell myself when these things occur!
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I guess people can't feel anxiety if they don't have it so don't get it. Everyone has a little bit, but it's more for some like us here :p
 
megalon

megalon

Well-known member
Tuukka40 said:
Sorry to resurrect a somewhat old thread...

It actually reaaalllly embarrasses me when people say things like this and makes me avoid talking once I feel I have been deemed "quiet and shy" by a group.
But could it be that the majority of people just don't realize how much having SA sucks? People usually don't openly try to offend others, especially when it comes to their problems..
As in, I'm sure an overweight person probably doesn't get comments like "wow, you're actually eating a salad?"
Maybe people don't see others with SA as being such a bad thing, or else they wouldn't joke about it.

Just an idea...at least that is what I try to tell myself when these things occur!
Click to expand...

Yeah, I think people don't mean any harm when they make comments like this, not usually anyway. I don't take offense when people say things like that. In their minds, they actually think they're helping, like they are bringing it to our attention so we can take steps to rectify it. They don't understand that it's not that simple for us.
 
Regret93

Regret93

Well-known member
Same thing happens to me, but it's weird since when I do get a chance to talk in a social situation, I tend to talk a lot. "Why don't you ever talk?" well, for one, I only like to talk when I want to, not when society deems it the right time to talk. I don't get people's need to pollute the air with words. I like silence. It's only awkward silence when someone says the word "awkward".
 
R3K

R3K

Well-known member
should tell these non-social phobics who say this to us, when they've been quiet for more than 5 seconds "hey congratulations on shutting up for 5 seconds!":applause::applause::applause:
 
FountainandFairfax

FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
R3K said:
should tell these non-social phobics who say this to us, when they've been quiet for more than 5 seconds "hey congratulations on shutting up for 5 seconds!":applause::applause::applause:
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I'm going to drive by my old middle-school and just yell this out the window.
 
Teemasterj

Teemasterj

Member
After I finally figured out I had SA and saw a doctor for it, I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders. It is so enjoyable now to be able to start and actually hold a conversation with anyone. I suffered through 50 years of 'shyness' before my diagnosis and prescription created a 'new' life of conversation and talking for me.
 
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