bullying ruined my life

davidburke · 02-08-2010, 06:46 PM

I don't think i have talked about this much on here because i find it so hard to put in to words and ive tryed to block it out but here's my story. I was bullied mentally and physically all through secondary school for 5 years straight by one guy in particular or if he was with a crowd they would join in. I was called fat and lazy all the time and they kept saying are you able to talk. I was beaten up almost everyday if the guy saw me at break time he would corner me and start shouting names at me and he would just start punching sometimes, sometimes not, pushing around i was in contant fear he would usually do this until i started to cry.

I very rarely tryed to fight back but he was too strong so i just learned to go along with. I was even beaten up and shouted names at if a teacher was out of the room so i was constantly terrified. I used to hide in the toilets for as long as i could even during classes to avoid him. all this time i had thought about killing myself i even had it worked out that i would take an overdose but i really just wanted to cry for help. I had absolutely no friends throughout school i talked to no one but even when i did i was told "shut up, you don't talk"

I put up with until 5th year when i just got so depressed and couldn't put up go to school anymore it just had all built up inside me i couldn't get out of bed and stopped eating. I had never actually told anyone about and i couldn't even tell my parents about it because i felt ashamed. My parents made me go to a doctor and i was put on meds and referred to a psychologist and that was the first time i talked about it to anyone. Eventually my parents decided to send me to a private school so i could do my leaving cert. I think this is pretty much what caused my sa and will always affect me

chained · 02-08-2010, 08:05 PM

use the anger u feel towards those *******s to make ur life better!!!!! let it motivate u

I'm sorry..

mrb · 02-08-2010, 08:47 PM

thats a sad story mate ......... kids can be so cruel to other kids cant they ..

jayo · 02-08-2010, 11:49 PM

David - the same thing happened to me in Galway.

Except it started in 5th year and built up badly into 6th year.
The guy in question was the captain of the rugby team - asswipe!
He went into the army and then into the prison service.
That was 20 years ago.....

I started feeling symptoms of SA in 5th year which coloured

(this colour) every encounter with the opposite sex and some other people.

My confidence drained away and I became cannon fodder for the man above. I was just happy to leave school in the end but that experience and many others have left emotional scars.

All I can say to you as I approach 40 is that every person out there in their unique way has hurdles of some sort which hinder them and do you and I.
All you can do is stay true to what you are, who you are and what you want to be. The best therapy in getting past this hurdle is to say it out loud as you are doing and move on to the next stage of your life.

lyricalliaisons · 02-09-2010, 01:29 AM

I'm sorry about your experiences

. I definitely know what it's like to have to go through that torture, though for me, I was lucky in that it was only mental & verbal & not physical.

BlackKids · 02-09-2010, 01:41 AM

That sucks dude but I'm sure you'll have the last laugh. Your in college on your way to a great job. In a few years when your driving a sweet car and have a gorgeous wife this will all be a distant memory.

Shame you didn't fight back everytime. I still stand by it that if you fight back/attack a bully everytime it will soon be short lived.

jhanniffy · 02-09-2010, 01:48 AM

I'm sorry to hear it was like that

Hellhound · 02-09-2010, 06:03 AM

The people who did that to you... they have issues, seriously :/ I hope they get their a**es kicked someday. They deserve it.

Alyosha · 02-09-2010, 06:27 AM

I had a similar experience in middle school. The teacher even new about but didn't interfere. There was four kids that used to abuse me physically and verbally. I never forgot those kids Its something I thought I would grow out of but it still haunts me.

DarkSeeker · 02-10-2010, 04:05 AM

I was bullied like you wouldn't believe up until the end of high school where I was left for dead. However, the biggest bullies I had in my life has always been and will always be the monsters normal humans call "parents". It has become pretty clear, even though I have no memory of it, that I've been bullied ever since being 0 year old. Being the target of bullies at school was simply a consequence of this.