Can't Continue living like this ...

I'm so sick of feeling like an outsider ,everyone around me seems to be doing something enjoyable with there lives .I sometime feel as though life is passing me by.People are getting older and wiser it seems as though I'm stuck in the same routine that my SP keeps me wraped in. I just want to break free

hi sherry welcome to the forum. i'm a newbie here too and i know exactly what you mean, as will many others on this forum. It sometimes feels like i'm on a treadmill to my future pounding round and round extra hard and getting nowhere while everyone else just walks onwards to theirs. I would love to break free as there's so much i wanna do and experience, but right now the only thing i can do is ... not a lot.

I guess the first step is posting on a forum like this, and from what i've seen there are a lot of people who'll give you help and moral support. If you're anything like me you just wanna be normal and get on with life, it doesn't seem like a lot to ask ... but it ain't gonna happen overnight, it's a long journey and there are many, many others out there trying to tread the same path.

If you wanna email me feel free to do so, cos i think we're at a similar stage, but if not i look forward to hearing from you on the boards!!

Hi Sherry, welcome to to SPW.

I know what you mean about life passing you by. I can't believe I'm creeping up to 30! Where the hell has my life gone?

Still, the good news (in my opinion) is that all of us can change. I think a huge problem is as you said, SP can become a routine. It seems like the best progress is made by people who consistently challenge their fears bit by bit. Gradually breaking old habits and routines by building new more positive ones. It's scary and a hell of a lot easier to say than to do but it has been done.

What kind of things do you feel you are missing out on? Maybe you could start off by working on the smaller things and work up over time.

I hope you and all of us can find a way to do this. It sucks being a fraction of what we could be. Good luck.

Hi Sherry,

I can understand where you are coming from, I feel the same way. I am 37 and feel like my life is passing me by. I have not achieved anything and live each day the same work, sleep and eat. You can change this is you really want to but it is hard work and you need to take little small steps to get there. You need to decide what you want in your life like how happy you are, to maybe join a group and learn a new hobbie which will help you get out and meet new people. Once you know what you want then you can start making the necessary changes to help you achieve that. One small step at a time is all it takes. When you have got SP it is so easy to get stuck in your safe comfort zone and not want to do anything else as it would mean you have to put yourself out of your comfort zone but it can be done. It is up to you how much you want to change yourself. Only you can make your life more enjoyable.

Hello Sherry,

I know what you mean!!!

I'm 23 and I feel just like you and everyone else on here too, kind of like I'm just excisting but not 'living'. The scary part for me is I realise I'm still only young, and this really scares me because thats when your suppose to make the best of yourself and I certainly don't, which I can't help and it really frustrates the hell out of me.

I just hope I don't get to about 90 and turn into some kind of 'Social Phob -free freak' ha ha ...that will really depress me then, knowing that I really didn't make the best of being young. Sorry I couldn't give you any useful advise, but I just wanted you to know I understand how you feel......

I can relate to everyone on here.Im glad to know that there are other people like me ,but I'm sad at the fact that we are all struggling with this illness .You would think that there could be some type of surgery to correct this small flaw. I really don't know what causes SP, but I do know that it's hell to live with. My problem is that I over obssess about this illness and in a way ,Im giving it more power over me .It's so hard to think positive thoughts, since I've been feeding myself negative thoughts for years.In a way I believe low selfestem is the cause for SP but I'm not sure.

sherry i know exactly how you feel!
im only 14 and s/p is controlling my life!
i need a way out or ill just give up!

I feel the same way too, anxiety keeps me in a situation I am unhappy in, cause I'm too scared to make a change, in personal life, in my go-nowhere job, etc. Nothing can change till I change it, but not sure if I ever can. It's frustrating :evil: Don't want to get to be older person, and have many regrets, all because of this phobia.