Dealing w/irritability,migraines & family.

cowboyup

Well-known member
Hi,
I've been having issues lately regarding my grandmother (93 yrs old) and she tends to cut me down while praising other family members, like "you used to be so pretty and smart, I wonder what happened"

Ok, I understand she's elderly and I love her dearly but it's been spilling into other areas of my life (her negativity towards me) like I am growing impatient with nephew & niece, my anxiety and panic attacks are out of control, and I then begin to have terrible migraines which reflect my outward disposition within the family and I need to keep it together.

I've had talk with my grandmother -she lives in another state and I am not accepting her calls as of now until I can get a handle on all this.

How can I keep positive and happy around the kids and family, any suggestions please?
 

Shenmue

Well-known member
That is a toughie. I myself am a big believer in respecting your elders. But at the same time, I'm also a fan of treating people how I like to be treated as well. So if I was in your situation, and I was told that I was close to resembling the elephant man's incredibly ugly looking brother, and had the intellect of an incredibly basic pocket calculator, then I would.................continue to let my 93 year old grandmother compare me to all those things. After all, when you get to 93, I think it gives you a free pass to say pretty much anything to anyone. Personally I think you got off lucky, as your grandmother could have said something even more outrageous to you, like....On second thoughts, I will finish that thought when I reach 93. But I’m sure if you read between the lines in what your grandmother said to you, then it sounds like she just wants the best for you. Granted, there is quite a lot of lines to read through, but once you eventually get through all those lines to the right line, then I'm sure the right line will shine through (or something like that)
 
Your Grandmother sounds like a bully who puts other people down to make herself feel better about herself and her own life.

Those types of people usually pick on the ones they know will not fight back.
The ones they know will accept their toxic negativity.

I agree with Gunther, just ignore her. :)
 

cowboyup

Well-known member
Thanks guys for your input. I have since told my grandmother-nicely- that I do not appreciate that kind of talk and if she wants to call and talk about ...I don't the weather, or how they are doing, fine. But otherwise, grandma, I am fine and I am going to college so I can get a good paying job...

Again ,thanks to all :)
 
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