Diary publication thread of mine

[Nanita]

Diary-like-publication - journal

I will start a lil journal.
And I´ll start it off by sayin that today was a strange and sad day.

From yesterday till today I tried to help an abandoned dog get a new home. Things went well as I got in touch with an organization.
Then the weird communication began. Especially one woman had a very negative attitude towards me. All the communication was done by emails.
I won´t get into the details of what was said and done., it´s too far out and silly to try to explain it.
In the end the dog was helped and for that I am grateful!!!!

The whole communication with the people just made me so nervous and sad, like really anxious. I wonder if other people get nervous like that too, from bad communication with negative people.

I wish there were animal organizations where animals actually worked in the office answering emails.




N

 

[sullyS25]

I get anxious or nervous in those situations as well. When someone is obviously having a bad day and they decide to make you their scapegoat. I try to remind myself that they are being difficult because of their own issues and it has nothing to do with me but when I am in the moment it is difficult. Someday I will learn to not take these things personally but today I still do. I have gotten better though and don't dwell on it forever like I used to. You mentioned you were grateful that the dog found a home finally so to go along with the gratitude thing, I am grateful for the little changes I have made in regards to not taking things personally. For me it is all about progress and not perfection.

By the way, that was very sweet of you to help an abandoned dog find a home. You seem like a very kind-hearted person Nanita!

 

[Nanita]

Gracias amigo
Kind-hearted. well that is one quality I will try to practice more.
Yes... taking things personally is a real difficult trap that is too easy to fall into.

 

[Nanita]

Woke up with migraine headache, had breakfast, migraine went away, later started having a sore throat.
Was supposed to go to the post office and some stores, but stayed in.

Having worries and thoughts about breaking up. I might be out of my mind considering it. We are great. The most wonderful thing.
I don´t think I can handle the challenges that go with it.
Can´t function around the people and circumstances that surround it, us.
Frustrated.

Want to be able to sense my inner emotional guidance system because I´m not able to feel what is right or wrong for me.

 

[Section_31]

Nanita, you arent alone in worries of breakup. Im married and worry about that every, single, day.

All i can say is try to take it day by day. if you think about the future too much you can drive yourself crazy. *hug*

 

[Nanita]

Nanita, you arent alone in worries of breakup. Im married and worry about that every, single, day.

All i can say is try to take it day by day. if you think about the future too much you can drive yourself crazy. *hug*

That´s true, thinking about future can be too upsetting..
Thank you

 

[MikeyC]

I try to hardly ever think about the future, for better or worse in terms of planning, but I know it's something that's just going to upset me all the time. If everything is going fine in the relationship, then there's nothing to worry about. If you have any issues, talking with your partner is the best thing you can do as he's there to support you. Good luck.

 

[Nanita]

I try to hardly ever think about the future, for better or worse in terms of planning, but I know it's something that's just going to upset me all the time. If everything is going fine in the relationship, then there's nothing to worry about. If you have any issues, talking with your partner is the best thing you can do as he's there to support you. Good luck.

Thanks Mikey C.
Well, I have spoken to my guy about this, and right now it´s not so simple for us. There are some things I need to do and some fears I gotta dare facing, if I´m gonna continue being with him. Just... certain circumstances and challenges that make me very frustrated.

 

[MikeyC]

Thanks Mikey C.
Well, I have spoken to my guy about this, and right now it´s not so simple for us. There are some things I need to do and some fears I gotta dare facing, if I´m gonna continue being with him. Just... certain circumstances and challenges that make me very frustrated.

Having to face fears head-on for an important cause like the relationship staying together is a big deal. I wish you well with it all and don't forget to post your progresses.

 

[Porto]

Love is all about sharing fears. Everyone as on different levels. I'm sure truth love will help you go trough yours. I'm sure love is terapeutic! Dont loose that.

 

[Nanita]

Not sure if love is enough.
I do believe in "All you need is love".
But for me love is not always enough to participate in a relationship.
The love and care doesn´t dissapear, I will still feel that love, no matter what I think of the relationships difficulties.
Hmmmm. Complicated stuff.
:/

 

[Nanita]

Recently got in contact on email with a woman who is a therapist and who also had a disorder when she was younger. I can´t afford starting therapy with her, but God I wish I could, because the CBT I´m offered at the local mental hospital, is not helping me.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy focuses on what we can do to change thoughts and behaviour. This is not the solution for me. I believe I need to work with all the stuff that happended to me as a child and teenager, the traumas and the disfunctional family I was brought up in. Which is the whole reason I became a social phobic and developed Avoidant Personality Disorder.

Annoyed with "system".

Frustrated.

 

[Porto]

Love is all around. But starts on ourself. Love to people is just one more way of it. I hope u find happiness rather then love

 

[MikeyC]

Not sure if love is enough.
I do believe in "All you need is love".
But for me love is not always enough to participate in a relationship.

Trust is #1. You absolutely need to trust each other to have any hope of a long-lasting relationship. I knew a couple who couldn't trust each other with a pen, let alone being friends with the opposite sex, and so naturally their relationship failed and restarted too many times. They're completely over now but I think they wasted too much time with each other. I hope that doesn't happen to you.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy focuses on what we can do to change thoughts and behaviour. This is not the solution for me. I believe I need to work with all the stuff that happended to me as a child and teenager, the traumas and the disfunctional family I was brought up in. Which is the whole reason I became a social phobic and developed Avoidant Personality Disorder.

You're the one that'll be paying the cash for therapy, so if something's not working for you, speak up about it. Don't have your hard-earned money being fizzled out on CBT if it's not going to help you out.

 

[Nanita]

You're the one that'll be paying the cash for therapy, so if something's not working for you, speak up about it. Don't have your hard-earned money being fizzled out on CBT if it's not going to help you out.

Oh but it´s free, all offers from psychiatric hospitals are free in this country (well, not free but included in the taxes we pay).
But the types of free therapy they offer, are very limited and not working for everyone obviously.

 

[MikeyC]

Oh but it´s free, all offers from psychiatric hospitals are free in this country (well, not free but included in the taxes we pay).
But the types of free therapy they offer, are very limited and not working for everyone obviously.

Ah, okay. I still don't think it's worth going if it's not working for you.

 

[Nanita]

Went to see some improvised theatre. It was fun.
Returned "home" (currently don´t have a real home/my own place to live).
Went on damn facebook, which can be nice to use, to share information and music and that stuff, but when it comes to communicating with people, it gets weird Some people just create drama and misunderstand each other. Makes me nervous.

Going on a trip in a few days, to visit boyfriend for some weeks. I think this is pretty much it for us, I can´t see how we´re gonna make it work; live too far away from each other, and I have too many difficulties with life, socializing, myself, my health. I guess that was my last chance of a relationship. I hate life.

 

[MikeyC]

Going on a trip in a few days, to visit boyfriend for some weeks. I think this is pretty much it for us, I can´t see how we´re gonna make it work; live too far away from each other, and I have too many difficulties with life, socializing, myself, my health. I guess that was my last chance of a relationship. I hate life.

I'm sorry it isn't working out. :: You have to look after yourself sometimes.

 

[Feathers]

Good to see a diary thread, Nanita!!

I hope you will keep updating it!!

(I keep meaning to write you, but got distracted! )

Great that you helped that dog - some animal shelters had funding cut so they may be under stress!!
Hope your fairytale goes well - anyway, remember IT'S AN ADVENTURE!!!!

(And we can always escape to Mexico!!!! umm, if we win the lottery or something!! )

 

[Nanita]

I have just been 1 month in Greece visiting my boyfriend
Loved the sun lemontrees blue sky and made lots of dog-friends ..
Thoughts of creating a break up evolved into thoughts n plans about what we want to do together
Now, a little more confused than ever - or as confused as usual -
And feelings of freedom
f*ck safety & conventions