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Old 11-22-2010
 

I know its a little off topic, but its something I have always wondered. I do realize that it depends on the context and how well the two parties know each other, but its an issue that confuses me. Obviously, I have said the aforementioned compliment and hasnt gone down to well. I wont go into details, but from past experience I am now terrified of actually telling a girl that I am involved with that she is beautiful..even though I really mean it. So just wondering.... girls...do you like being complimented in that way? Guys...anyone? ARRGGH...
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Old 11-22-2010
EscapeArtist's Avatar
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Err i'm not a typical girl... Tom boy girl but I'm guessing that they do. Anybody loves being called beautiful.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

I am female, and I would say most girls like to be told they are beautiful.
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Old 11-22-2010
MsBuzzkillington's Avatar
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People like to be complimented. Girls want to hear that they are beautiful. Hearing compliments makes them feel loved and desired. Can't really see any negatives in giving someone a compliment.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

I feel like I dont understand the world.
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Old 11-22-2010
Cynic's Avatar
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Like anything else, it depends on who tells them.
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Old 11-22-2010
*Amy*'s Avatar
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If she has SAD she will probably feel a little uncomfortable and flush, but as other users have said, everybody likes being told nice things.
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Old 11-22-2010
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Compliments work, but flattery quite often won't.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

Actually...she did have SAD. I didnt realize that until she told me later...I was quite excited about that when I found out. I actually think that because the compliment came from me, it simply wasnt valid.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

Interesting question. In many instances (especially early on) I feel that it's such a redundant remark that it tends to do more harm than good - but of course, that depends on the context in which it is said. If I'm flirting with or dating a woman, then I assume she already knows, so why make things more awkward than they need to be? Personally, I prefer to save a comment like that for when the relationship is more developed. Timing and restraint are also important. If we've been seeing each other for a couple of months or so and I drop a well-meant "you look beautiful" just before a night out with her, then that tends to work well because we've gone the distance and I use my compliments sparingly. But if we've just met, I find it sounds shallow and disingenuous. In that sense, I guess my guideline has always been to ask myself "am I important to her?" and if I am, it's safe to say because she will value my opinion. If not, I figure I'll sound like every other dude who tries to chat her up.

This is just what I've noticed so far in life, take from it what you will.
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Old 11-22-2010
*Amy*'s Avatar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShyKiwi View Post
Actually...she did have SAD. I didnt realize that until she told me later...I was quite excited about that when I found out. I actually think that because the compliment came from me, it simply wasnt valid.
Of course it was valid! And I think she liked it, even if she looked a little uncomfortable. As I've said before, everybody likes being told nice things.
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Old 11-22-2010
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I'll have to remember this. I have enough trouble giving or receiving any kind of compliment, maybe I can use this
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Old 11-22-2010
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Most women do like to be told that they are beautiful. Perhaps with the exception of those who would rather be appreciated for their inner qualities. Then there are those women who see themselves as unattractive so they feel mocked by compliments.
The only compliments I don't like are the kind given with the intention to manipulate.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

I hate to be told I am beautiful.It has often been thrown in my face like "how dare you be depressed and shy". Or else people treat me like I have nothing else to offer (I don't). And these negative situations have made me react badly to genuine compliments from people like ShyKiwi. I fantasise about being told how much someone enjoys my company.

Okay, now I'm worried about how conceited and ungrateful this post sounds. It really is from my heart.
mmmm is offline  
Old 11-22-2010
 

I would imagine most girls would prefer it over being told the opposite. If I think a girl is beautiful, I tell her that I think she's beautiful. Call me a recidivist if you like, but I have no intention of changing my ways.
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Old 11-22-2010
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I like being told I'm beautiful.
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Old 11-22-2010
 

Even though i get all blushed and shy about it which is embarassing, it is still nice to hear....
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Old 11-22-2010
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The only time a girl won't like you calling her beautiful is:

1. If she doesn't like you the same way and therefore feels guilty and/or plain uncomfortable

2. If she doesn't think you mean it (maybe by the way u pose/expression etc.) and therefore thinks you are joking

social anxiety is unpleasant no? :(
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Old 11-22-2010
twist3d's Avatar
Newbie User
 

I'm girl and I have SAD (obviously...). I'm not pretty so I don't get comments like that. But once a guy called me cute (he was pretty drunk lol) and I totally panicked. Because I had no idea what to do or how to take it.
I must have seemed really weird and maybe even rude. But I just though stuff like "what am I supposed to say"? I think I said something like "yeah, right" lol. And I also though that maybe he was just lying. And I also felt like I was in dept to him - like I should make out with him because he was being nice.

Weird huh? But sometimes mental people think weird. So if a shy girl reacts badly to compliments, it isn't your fault.

Commenting someone's looks so bluntly can be a bit too much at first for some people. Or so I would think. Since so many women are insecure about their looks?
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Old 11-22-2010
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I've so rarely had this compliment, that as the previous poster stated, I have no idea how to deal with it. I automatically assume they must be joking- or, if they somehow convince me of their sincerity, I then think of them as weirdos. I wouldn't say I don't like it, but I would prefer not to hear it, because it makes me think they're just trying to pick on me in some way.
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