Do girls like being told they are beautiful

Aussie_Lad

Well-known member
Well, I have told in total of three women that they are beautiful. One took it well, I think she may have loved me, but I am not sure. One felt uncomfortable with it, and asked me "really...?" and simply disregarded it. The other one went off the rails and started shouting at me that I only liked her for her body. Sorry to whinge, not a stab at females or anything, I only asked because I get so confused at what to say and how to act... I simply want to pay a genuine compliment and get an expected response back.... I dont throw out "your beautiful" to just anyone you know..

So you had one genuine lady, one with low self esteem, and one psycho?
 

Kinetik

Well-known member
Aussie Lad brings up a good point - some women are so aggressive and mentally unstable that they're not a fair way to measure the success of anything. It's easy to blame yourself and think you're doing something wrong when you've had a dose of this in your life but it's really not your fault. Don't get me wrong, these women need love and support too, but first and foremost, they need help and it's not your responsibility to provide it. In any case, try to see what you're dealing with when you get a reaction that's completely out of proportion - see it for what it is (some kind of suffering on her part) and it becomes easier to not take it personally.
 
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Feathers

Well-known member
LOL Aussie Lad!! :)

I think Kinetik is right, to use it sparingly, and after you two have known each other a bit...
And also to make sure you appreciate her for other qualities first..

It also depends if she's 'generally considered' attractive, or has a more 'hidden' type of beauty that may not be apparent to everyone, and if she has self-doubts and is not so sure of it..

For very beautiful girls that know it saying they're beautiful to start with is redundant, they've been told so before.. It may be better to find what she values (eg kindness, inspiration, creativity, being genuine or whatever) and then (if she has that quality/when she shows it) to some time later tell her what you appreciate is _____________ (she's so creative/genuine/such an inspiration!) And eg mention when and where you saw that... (eg Wow, what an interesting necklace you made! I love it how creative you are...) Of course be honest about these things... only mention what you really genuinely admire..
It's better to be descriptive than too general...

For early on, it's better to like or mention eg her interesting earrings or shoes or something 'non-dangerous' lol... maybe it's okay to mention a non-threatening bodypart too, nothing obvious of course, it might be okay to say you like her smile, or she has beautiful feet or knuckles or hands, dunno... :) Maybe something that will make her grin a little and go, 'Hmm...?' Of course it has to be believeable, and true... lol

It really depends on the person too, and what they are like... and how long you have known each other, what you think of each other, what stage you're in, what situation it's said in...
 

SickCycleCarousel

Well-known member
I would definitely like being told I'm beautiful. No one has ever said it to me to my face (no one outside my family, anyway). This guy I used to talk to online told me numerous times that was beautiful and it made me feel really good (we'd talk on Skype so I could tell by his voice that he was sincere).
 

Kat

Well-known member
Yeah, it may make me cringe a little but I would get over it. I would feel even worse if it was never mentioned.
 

Sinar_Matahari

Well-known member
Someone told me that I have a pretty smile and it may be a small thing to most people, but it meant a lot to me. I know it's silly. It's just that I never really thought of my smile as particularly attractive and I've always been envious of women with beautiful smiles. Sometimes it's nice to hear someone tell you that you're beautiful, but I find that it's the small compliments that make a difference in the way a woman may feel. Telling a woman that she's beautiful is a big compliment and sometimes the woman in question does not see herself as beautiful so she might be not react in a way that one may expect. So saying something nice about her eyes, or smile or hair may seem less dramatic, but will make her happy. I'd reserve the "you're beautiful" for the right moment.
 

Feathers

Well-known member
Okay, maybe I'm just 'looney' then. (I liked being told I have a pretty smile though too :) or pretty eyes, or such 'believable' things... not from a guy when we first met, after a while... when I started liking him already, and wondering if he likes me too, and in what way..)

A guy I only talked with one day at an event sent me an e-mail calling me beautiful etc. I already knew he found me attractive, so this was totally redundant..
Attached is a photo of me, where I look everything but. (Weird angle, when I wasn't looking etc.)
Now I wonder:
- if he's douchebag-y
- or just a cool guy with SA who has no idea what to write to a girl in the first e-mail??
- has totally bad taste
- has poor eyesight (probably, he had glasses and didn't use'em all the time.. ahh!!)
- is trying to flatter me?

WHAT?

At the event he said he appreciates character better than looks (tough luck there too, I don't have a very good character, and have bad temper too...) sooo...??

I thought he was nice to talk to, probably not for anything more though - though maybe, if I got to know him slower in a friends-way...?? (He works in a very unlikely place for an eco girl like me to appreciate though lol.. Though it's good to have contacts at that kind of places too.. So just-friends would be nice, this total direct approach totally freaks me out though??)
Maybe I'm just not used to that kind of things?

and don't know what to write him back!!

Aaagh!! Guys!!! Grr!! Maybe I need to write a 'Guidebook' and start handing it out??
 

coyote

Well-known member
Okay, maybe I'm just 'looney' then. (I liked being told I have a pretty smile though too :) or pretty eyes, or such 'believable' things... not from a guy when we first met, after a while... when I started liking him already, and wondering if he likes me too, and in what way..)

A guy I only talked with one day at an event sent me an e-mail calling me beautiful etc. I already knew he found me attractive, so this was totally redundant..
Attached is a photo of me, where I look everything but. (Weird angle, when I wasn't looking etc.)
Now I wonder:
- if he's douchebag-y
- or just a cool guy with SA who has no idea what to write to a girl in the first e-mail??
- has totally bad taste
- has poor eyesight (probably, he had glasses and didn't use'em all the time.. ahh!!)
- is trying to flatter me?

WHAT?

At the event he said he appreciates character better than looks (tough luck there too, I don't have a very good character, and have bad temper too...) sooo...??

I thought he was nice to talk to, probably not for anything more though - though maybe, if I got to know him slower in a friends-way...?? (He works in a very unlikely place for an eco girl like me to appreciate though lol.. Though it's good to have contacts at that kind of places too.. So just-friends would be nice, this total direct approach totally freaks me out though??)
Maybe I'm just not used to that kind of things?

and don't know what to write him back!!

Aaagh!! Guys!!! Grr!! Maybe I need to write a 'Guidebook' and start handing it out??

I think we'd have to see the photo to make an honest assessment.
 

Feathers

Well-known member
I think we'd have to see the photo to make an honest assessment.

No no, it's a horrible photo!!! :eek:

Brooklynn, how do you deal with these guys and just let'em know you're interested in mostly friends-only and still keep it nice?
I think he's a nice guy, just behaves a bit douchebag-y??
Maybe working for ((that specific employer)) does that to you?? OoO :eek:
 

UnOccupied

Well-known member
Of course they like it. But, it totally depends on the context it is said in. If you are being genuine, and friendly, they will almost always appreciate it. But, if you are blatenly hitting on them, and being creepy, they will probably give you the cold shoulder, or maybe even get offended. I have heard someone say, "I hope this doesn't offend you, but i felt the need to tell you that you are the most beautiful girl i have seen all day."
 

shygal84

Member
Girls always like a compliment as it makes them feel good about themselves epecially in cases where they don't have any confindence or self belief in themselves in the first place so yes girls do like and really appreciate when someone tells them they are beautiful.
 

Minty

Well-known member
I think people like being called beautiful if it's obvious that you're not saying it to get something in return.

"I think you're a really beautiful person." vs. "I think you're really beautiful (and I'm interested in you. Want to go out?)"
 

Minty

Well-known member
Whats wrong with telling a girl you're attracted to them? :confused:

Nothing at all! I honestly would be flattered if anyone at all asked me out, even if I wasn't attracted to them. I'm just saying, some people react negatively to being put in that position. Because they don't want to hurt the other person. Does that make sense?
 

Pookah

Well-known member
I think telling someone they are beautiful would have to stem from deep sincerity and an already established interpersonal relationship in real life.
 

Seasons

Well-known member
My guess:

If the girl is indeed beautiful and aware of it she will like to hear it, no matter who is saying it.

If the girl is not too self-confident but thinks she's kind of ok then she may feel a bit awkward and not know how to react, she may flush, smile a bit... here it does matter who says it. If it sounds sincere she will probably like it even if she doesn't believe it herself, if it doesn't sound honest it can kind of backfire on you...

If the girl truly thinks she's ugly (even if you yourself think she's cute) then it totally depends on who says it. If you're close then she may not physically hurt you :p and won't hold it against you, she'll appreciate the effort but still think it's b******t. If you're not close than it's bad. She'll think you're not interested in her but only want to use her.
 
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