Does Your SA Make You Paranoid?

theoutsider

Well-known member
I find that lately, I have become somewhat paranoid at work. Whenever my manager has a meeting in his office where he needs to close the door, I feel like he is talking to someone who is complaining about my work quality. Even when I know deep down that it's probably something else, I can't concentrate well until the meeting is over. Then I don't feel completely relaxed until either enough time has passed or I find out the meeting was about something totally different. Of course then I feel silly but very relieved. Also, I've gotten to the point where I don't want to be the first person in my office to leave for the day. We all go home around the same time but sometimes my office-mates will stick around a little longer. I feel like if I leave first it will give them an opportunity to discuss what a peculiar person I am (since I am quiet) which will lead to dislike. I usually try to stick around until at least two of them have left. It's funny, I really think I've improved on my SA issues but this is one area where I think I have gotten worse. Anybody else have this issue?
 

planetweirdo

Well-known member
Yes I also have that problem. I'm always worried about people saying things about me behind my back. whenever I leave the house and see people walking down the street I wonder if they would look at me and think that I look like a freak. I imagine that they would go home and tell there family and friends all about the freaky weird nervous looking guy they had seen, than they all would have a good laugh.
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
I feel exactly the same way, TheOutsider. Some of the staff do talk, so now I think every whisper every close office door, is a discussion about me.
 

Froggy246

Well-known member
Yes what's all that about!? And why is it connected. The smallest things can trigger a paranoia attack, like the way someone looks at me, or change in someone's greeting one day. My manager has recently sent me a one to one meeting appointment a day early and now I'm worried I've done something wrong. I've been so paranoid before that I've loitered outside peoples offices to try and hear what their saying.
 

Api

Active member
Yup, though I didn't really think it was my SA as much as me being crazy.
 

theoutsider

Well-known member
Yes what's all that about!? And why is it connected. The smallest things can trigger a paranoia attack, like the way someone looks at me, or change in someone's greeting one day. My manager has recently sent me a one to one meeting appointment a day early and now I'm worried I've done something wrong. I've been so paranoid before that I've loitered outside peoples offices to try and hear what their saying.

I'm thinking it may be a cumulative effect of all the times I found out later that somebody actually was talking about me when I didn't suspect a thing.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Oh, aye. Especially if I walk into a room to get something the conversation suddenly stops.

Or if ah tell a joke I thought was funny and no-one laugh. Which is just awkward, kinda like accidently walkin' in on yer parents huvin' sex.
 

HugoC

Member
I am also extremely sensitive about what people may be saying about my quiet behaviour in the office and I think that works in my head in a not so positive way. Sometimes I really believe that people are thinking that I am awkward, odd, weird and that makes me start behaving awkwardly, weirdly and in an odd manner and start loosing connection with them.
Sometimes they might not be even thinking that at all, it's just my head.
But some other times I might be right. People criticise each other in work environments and SA people can be easy targets for scapegoating because we are tend to be more dettached from the group. I ultimately believe in good human nature that lies under all the gossip and eventual social toxicity that never lets people judge me or my work for my social shortcomings. And that thought always helped me to relax (and never proved wrong so far).
 

Argentum

Well-known member
I think I simply haven't had the luxury of growing up believing that people are unanimously honest and good. In some environments, people have typically been helpful and I don't think much about them. In others, they've typically been exploitative and cruel. Keeping one eye open is smart.

Sometimes I worry that I'm being paranoid and unfair... but then I get definitive signs that yes, there are definite threats. I'd rather be a paranoid loner than a sucker.
 

Sacrament

Well-known member
It does give me fear of people talking negatively about me, or simply having a negative opinion about me, but if I act confidently people find me funny and interesting to talk to (in the sense that my opinion/input matters as well). My solution is to simply trust in who I am, and find ways to be content with the image I presented. More confidence = less stuttering, less indecisiveness, and so on. Everything else, ie, the things I can only imagine (which will be mostly negative for sure), I do my best not to focus on, otherwise they'll ruin whatever positivity you got from previous interactions. And if I think people are in some way annoyed with something I did or said, there's nothing better than just asking.
 
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