Alaina

Ok, so social things are supposed to get easier when you do them repeatedly. Each time you do it, it's supposed to get a little easier, and that's how you overcome the problems. Exposure therapy.

But it never feels like it's getting easier! However many times I do the thing, I always FEEL exactly the same about it beforehand and after! Scared, and like I really don't want to do it.

Has anyone here ever managed to learn to feel comfortable doing something social that they previously did not feel comfortable doing? If so, how?

Shyguest

Hi,

I am quite certain I know what you're talking about. I've also heard that the more often you do things the easier they get. It doesn't seem to work with social anxiety issues though. I think what's needed is some way of interrupting sa thoughts when they occur. The thing is it's difficult to do this.

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RedFacedBandit

i just recently learned how to not fear situations simply by trying to make myself have an anxiety attack in a socially situations and the more i tried the harder it was for it to come on. so now i dont fear the anxiety because i know its all in my head and could easily be controlled. if you dont fear it you wont have it. plain and simple.

cLavain

I know what you mean.

But I guess for this to work you need to have a good experience when you do something social, otherwise it will reinforce your fear or just maintain your current level of fear. I know from personal experience that I feel slightly bolder immediately after a successful encounter with someone. Sadly, I'm easily discouraged again...

I also think that if I had not done anything social, I would have been even worse by now, so it's probably not a complete waste.

Richey

I can relate to all of the opinions mentioned so far. For me the problem is not getting over the fear, its just that i find it hard to express myself. I never seem to feel atease with myself in terms of expression. I have friends who can talk non stop and everything seems to make sense. I find it difficult to string a sentence together and i have a deep voice so that my main issue.

Shyguest

Hi,

Out of interest, how do you try and make yourself anxious? I feel it comes on naturally.

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Hurricane

I guess you should start thinking about the things u fear, or bad memories where u had alot of anxiety. It's actually interesting enough to try out...but then I would get on the bandwagon of try's and fails again