SocialPhobiaWorld.com  
     

Home Register FAQ Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read
 
Go Back   SocialPhobiaWorld.com > Other related Disorders > Bullying Forum

Post New Thread Reply
 
Search this Thread
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Emotional abuse and mind games

Hi Im having mind games played with me at the moment and its driving me insane.

This is a list of what I want to know whether or not it's emotional abuse/manipulation:

Constant criticism of my beliefs and opinions - telling me I'm wrong ALL the time and forcing other opinions onto me.

Telling me I'm stupid every day.

Starting arguments about nothing - literally things as simple as how much brown sauce I put on food (seriously).

Telling me lies about things that have supposed to have happened in certain towns and cities to scare me from going.

Commenting on my dress sense because I'm expected to dress like an old man from 30 onwards.

Commenting on my shoes - telling me I should not go out in pumps saying I should wear formal sheos (the old man thing again) - trying to make out that NO-ONE wears certain things when half the people do!

Trying to make up things about hygiene - I'm very clean and this is criticised... if I decide say on Sundays to not shower this is criticised... either way whatever I do.

Engineering situations and arguments that they knwo will push my buttons and start arguments from nowhere like they like it.

Telling me I should only go out to ceratin places and throwing tantrums if I go to places that are dispaproved of.

Using guilt trips - like if Ive had money lent to me getting it constantly thrown back in my face.

I get verbal abuse in the street (homophobic) and all kinds of weird things happen because the area is backwards - this is not believed. Apparently I imagine it but I don't. They just black it out and try and make out I'm mad.

Is this emotional manipulation and abuse?
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
A86
Intermediate User
A86's Avatar
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

sounds like emotional abuse. Belittleing you and using guilt to get their way. if you feel defensive (may seem like anger) when these occur, its because you are being told to feel bad when nothing is wrong and that causes a confused internal defensive response. so im told.
emotional abuse is bullying.
A86 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

Quote:
Originally Posted by A86 View Post
sounds like emotional abuse. Belittleing you and using guilt to get their way. if you feel defensive (may seem like anger) when these occur, its because you are being told to feel bad when nothing is wrong and that causes a confused internal defensive response. so im told.
emotional abuse is bullying.
That's good advice and is some relief to realise it's not me making me feel the way I do about this situation if that makes sense.

I'm kind of feel as if I'm being manipulated into feeling and even acting out in a certain kind of way(kind of unconciously forced into it) - that is always twisted around into a sort of situation which makes me look bad and justifies their bad attitudes towards me. Im so frustrated that even when I think Ive realised what they're doing - some new kind of twisted insult and manipulation technique turns up and I only realise what's happened when I've been made to feel like a piece of dirt all over again. It's only very recently Ive faced up to the fact that I knew it was emotional abuse.
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
A86
Intermediate User
A86's Avatar
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

Quote:
Originally Posted by Benny310 View Post
It's only very recently Ive faced up to the fact that I knew it was emotional abuse.

Thats awesome. understanding what is happening is a good move forward as it is usualy near impossible to explain to an emotional manipulator what they are doing because their natural instict is to turn it around and make you feel bad for even trying to suggest such a thing... and they can be very effective at turning it around.
A86 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

Quote:
Originally Posted by Winja View Post
I hope you don't mind me asking, but is this your parents or your other half? It sounds like someone's got a bug up their *** and knows that you're stuck there. If this person isn't paying the bills, they better be smoking hot. Otherwise the end is coming for you and them and putting it off isn't going to change that.

Sorry if that's really opinionated. I might be wrong. In fact, I'm generally wrong.
Thanks for your reply. I don't mind opinions I need them in fact to make me see what's been going on here. It's my parents - embarassed to say Im in my 30's and back with them again for the last few years - theyre making my life a misery and know they currently have a hold over me with money, recession/jobs etc. They're just messing with my head all the time I know deep down its prob them who are damaged feeling the need to do this to me, its such a strange situation.
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

Quote:
Originally Posted by A86 View Post
Thats awesome. understanding what is happening is a good move forward as it is usualy near impossible to explain to an emotional manipulator what they are doing because their natural instict is to turn it around and make you feel bad for even trying to suggest such a thing... and they can be very effective at turning it around.
I know, everything's turned around constantly. Ive tried explaining it and challenging them but that's made matters worse. I just got "How can you say that" , "Youre not normal" (which Ive been told several times) "Something happened in the womb when you were concieved" , "Why have I ended up with someone like you".

Writing it and discussing it makes me see how disgusting the treatment has been towards me.
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
A86
Intermediate User
A86's Avatar
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

emotional bullying like that eats away your self-esteem which can severely impact ones life. no one needs to be beliitled like that. especialy from their parents.
A86 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

Quote:
Originally Posted by A86 View Post
emotional bullying like that eats away your self-esteem which can severely impact ones life. no one needs to be beliitled like that. especialy from their parents.
You're right no one needs it - so glad I posted on here. At least it gives me an outlet for people to be rational with me and understand etc.
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

I just decided to try and bring up the topic again but got shot down in what I can only desribe as a screaming match of poisonous abuse.

My Mum screamed and shouted at me yet again and me feel worthless all over again. I quoted some of the things she has said and tried to point out her behaviour and she went almost wild. All kinds of insults again and she says she never said things that she did and, as usual, tried to make out that I was making things up saying that she did not say these things and that I have imagined it. It was a horrible session that shouldve just been two adults talking things through in a rational manner.

I feel ashamed to say that I'm actually scared right now because when my Dad comes back she'll tell him a load of nonsense - which I regularly hear her doing when she thinks I'm not around.

I frightened and want to escape the poison and mind games and abuse. All I can do is stay silent but then that'stwisted into something from nothing.

I have no money at the moment so cant walk out but I feel like doing.... I can't cope with this much longer.
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2013  
Newbie User
 

Default Re: Emotional abuse and mind games

It's like it's her intention to completely destroy me as a person and everything I stand for. It's like she just wants a raw shell left.

I could never have imagined being in such a strange and frightening situation.

I can't call on anyone because I know no-one round here and they've made sure they've convinced family in my native city that I'm going mad and in need of help - but it's the reverse - what am I supposed to do?
Benny310 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads to Emotional abuse and mind games
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
How do you stay positive? I feel like my mind is playing games with me.. husky337 Hyperhidrosis Forum 2 12-14-2011 10:37 PM
SEVERE Mental and Emotional Neglect/Abuse LovelyAmor Social Anxiety Forum 12 11-29-2010 12:15 AM
emotional abuse in relationships exquisite Website Support 17 08-19-2010 05:29 PM
A Great Read...Turning Emotional Scars into Emotional Strengths atvsamala Articles 1 06-17-2010 04:17 AM
Small mind and big mind SickJoke Social Anxiety Forum 6 02-16-2009 12:49 AM


All times are GMT. The time now is 01:34 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.2.2