Extreme Intrusive thoughts- urgent help needed (TRIGGER WARNING)

F

flyinghome

Member
Right now I'm having extreme intrusive thoughts about little kids. Thoughts about raping or touching little kids. And I'm getting a little groinal response.

This is what is happening specifically: I automatically, without even thinking, say to myself "I wonder if I'll get aroused if so and so happens to a little kid". Then I imagine something happening to a little kid. Then I feel immense guilt and shame.

I asked a question about this topic on Experience Project, and everyone tells me to turn myself in to the police. So I'm really doubting myself right now. Am I pedophile?

Someone on EP even said something like "I know washing hands is a ritual for OCD, but I didn't know raping little kids is as well." Which begs the question, am I having OCD thoughts, or are these thoughts actually desires that I don't know I want?

My next CBT session is on July 15. How can I make things easy until then?

Any help is appreciated.
 
NathanielWingatePeaslee

NathanielWingatePeaslee

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!
Staff member
The 15th is 4 days from now. Definitely tell your therapist about this.

I don't understand OCD, but I know this seems to be a common problem.

Use the search function on the right side of the yellow-orange bar near the top and put in the word 'pedophile' and you'll get a ton of hits relating to OCD. Click on 'show posts'.
 
F

flyinghome

Member
Hey Nathaniel, thanks for the response.

I know the 15th is 4 days from now, but the thing is, I'm in a very important university course for the summer, and I can't miss any homework. I keep finding myself getting heavily distracted by my intrusive thoughts.

I will use the search function to see if anyone else has the same problem.
 
YellowBird

YellowBird

Well-known member
Yes,it's ocd,whoever said "washing hands" in only ocd is ignorant.Pedophiles aren't worried whether they are pedophiles,they just are.You can worry you like kids,you can worry you are attracted to a sex you're not attracted to,you can be highly religious and feel like you're about to use blasphemy.It's from too much anxiety.i used to suffer from this,but i tell you it gets better,a self help book was enough to help me get over it.
 
Hellhound

Hellhound

Super Moderator
If you were a pedo, you'd probably not even care to come to this forum to ask this question. But you should really tell your therapist as soon as you can.
 
F

flyinghome

Member
Hi guys,

The last two respondents said something along the lines of "if I'm really a pedophile, then I wouldn't care to worry about it." Is there any actual scientific evidence to back this up?

I'm not at all trying to criticize your responses, so sorry if it looks like I am.
 
I

ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
flyinghome said:
Right now I'm having extreme intrusive thoughts about little kids. Thoughts about raping or touching little kids. And I'm getting a little groinal response.

This is what is happening specifically: I automatically, without even thinking, say to myself "I wonder if I'll get aroused if so and so happens to a little kid". Then I imagine something happening to a little kid. Then I feel immense guilt and shame.

I asked a question about this topic on Experience Project, and everyone tells me to turn myself in to the police. So I'm really doubting myself right now. Am I pedophile?

Someone on EP even said something like "I know washing hands is a ritual for OCD, but I didn't know raping little kids is as well." Which begs the question, am I having OCD thoughts, or are these thoughts actually desires that I don't know I want?

My next CBT session is on July 15. How can I make things easy until then?

Any help is appreciated.
Click to expand...

I wrote a thread on this subject. Please read it. :)
http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/unwanted-thoughts-images-how-to-beat-it-45763/
 
PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Judging from your original post, and just from the information you have supplied, you certainly do need help.
Most people experience intrusive thoughts in some form

Mostly, people learn to brush them aside/pay them no heed.

What concerns me, is you have said you are actually getting some form of arousal from these thoughts.
Arousal = pleasure.
What happens when just the thoughts alone stop giving you that pleasure? Will you fantasize about taking things further?

It's not a normal thought process for you to be having, or a normal physical response.

Seek professional help.
 
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