Fear of food

sleepysparrow

sleepysparrow

Well-known member
I don't know if anyone else feels the same way but I think I have a serious problem with obsessing over what I eat. I'm terrified of certain foods and afraid they will make me fat, and i'm constantly counting calories and if I eat too many I feel I have to exercise excessively just to burn them off. My diet consists of almost nothing anymore, and i'm afraid of developing an eating disorder, I had a brief experience with one in the past. This is what I eat daily:

Morning: small bowl of cereal (rice crispies) skim milk, grapes, green tea

5 glasses of water

Lunch: either a sandwich on whole wheat bread, no butter, with just lettuce and extra lean turkey or chicken, or a salad with cucumbers and tomatoes and no dressing, maybe a soup if it is just vegetables.

5 glasses of water

Dinner: steamed veg, poaced eggs, or some kind of lean meat like turkey or chicken with veg, maybe non-fat yogurt

5 glasses of water and maybe some grapes

This is all I eat all day and i'm actually really hungry all the time, I don't think i'm too skinny right now, I guess i'm afraid of being too skinny or too fat but I just can't figure out which is worse, i'm just obsessed with the way I look and the way I appear to others, it's pretty unhealthy but I can't stop. Not to mention I have a disorder where I can't fast or go without food for too long or I could go into a coma/seizures.

Does anybody else, or has anybody else suffered from the same kind of problem?
 
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Redzer

Redzer

1
i eat very little in fact i eat just one meal a day and thats my dinner and that does be at 7pm at night and sometimes when i see it i just look at it and think ewww noo i dont wanna eat that. I dont like food or trying new foods i eat purley because i need to stay alive thats it.
 
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ocdkindofguy

Member
First off, I know NOTHING of food disorders, but (This is a terrible way to start a helping post :D) with my problems, I think that there is a period that it strikes me the most... Like in the first 10 or 20 minutes TOPS, I get really kind of shocked by a problem, but then I forget all about it, and it is like a trivial thing, like it is no big deal. Like: "Wow 0 minutes ago I tought that was going to make me fat?" It's still the same problem, but it's like it just doesn't matter anymore!
I don't have that kind of food problem, altough used to be daaamn skinny, plus not to mention very tall!! Not only that, but I used to be VERY VERY stiff in public... People even told me that I looked like a robot!! :D My shoulders were always very tense.... It was FUNNY. And I had more friends that also were kind of skinny and tall too, but they were actually very funny and more relaxed, and were also very magnetic people that everyone liked, being in such a good mood and all, they got lots of attention. Dunno if this is relevant, but I guess it makes me conclude that "the way I appear to others" isn't just my looks, but also if I am feeling well, and my body languege and so. If a person just is in a good mood and is friendly, then no one will really give a damn how he\she looks...

That was a year ago... Now I've started to eat more and am not so skinny, just so you can know, it is a LOT better, in my opinion, to be fat compared to skinny. I mean, a lot better. If I remember well, I used to be kind of dizzy sometimes when I didn't eat much... And I was less concentrated... Eating more is always better then less in my opinion.

Now this part may be wrong, I don't know, but eating less can make you feel bad, so eat girl!! Even if you obsess with being fat, that IS better then being skinny, and DEFFINITLY eat more, better then eating less. Don't be hungry that is just terrible. And re-reading your post about your disorder of going seziure, shouldn't that also motivate you to eat more?

Also I personally and from my knowledge it is a lot cuter in a girl to be a little fat then skinny.... At least I prefer that and I think that most of my guy friends think the same. Post conclusion: EAT!
 
anomicdeer

anomicdeer

Well-known member
I don't like eating most of the time. but I like food Lately I've only ate something if I start to starve and that's it. And when I see food when I'm not hungry it makes me feel sick.
 
Lea

Lea

Banned
I remember I had this too, for quite a long time and at several points in my life. I was afraid of food, and I was too skinny and anorexic. I looked so badly that I was literally ashamed to go out but couldn´t bring myself to eat more. My teeth were melting, and I lost my period for several years. Still, I wish I could go back to it these days but same as you, I get sick if I don´t eat for longer time, or am prone to fainting and seisures, and get plagued by those stupid nightmares.
 
sleepysparrow

sleepysparrow

Well-known member
ocdkindofguy said:
First off, I know NOTHING of food disorders, but (This is a terrible way to start a helping post :D) with my problems, I think that there is a period that it strikes me the most... Like in the first 10 or 20 minutes TOPS, I get really kind of shocked by a problem, but then I forget all about it, and it is like a trivial thing, like it is no big deal. Like: "Wow 0 minutes ago I tought that was going to make me fat?" It's still the same problem, but it's like it just doesn't matter anymore!
I don't have that kind of food problem, altough used to be daaamn skinny, plus not to mention very tall!! Not only that, but I used to be VERY VERY stiff in public... People even told me that I looked like a robot!! :D My shoulders were always very tense.... It was FUNNY. And I had more friends that also were kind of skinny and tall too, but they were actually very funny and more relaxed, and were also very magnetic people that everyone liked, being in such a good mood and all, they got lots of attention. Dunno if this is relevant, but I guess it makes me conclude that "the way I appear to others" isn't just my looks, but also if I am feeling well, and my body languege and so. If a person just is in a good mood and is friendly, then no one will really give a damn how he\she looks...

That was a year ago... Now I've started to eat more and am not so skinny, just so you can know, it is a LOT better, in my opinion, to be fat compared to skinny. I mean, a lot better. If I remember well, I used to be kind of dizzy sometimes when I didn't eat much... And I was less concentrated... Eating more is always better then less in my opinion.

Now this part may be wrong, I don't know, but eating less can make you feel bad, so eat girl!! Even if you obsess with being fat, that IS better then being skinny, and DEFFINITLY eat more, better then eating less. Don't be hungry that is just terrible. And re-reading your post about your disorder of going seziure, shouldn't that also motivate you to eat more?

Also I personally and from my knowledge it is a lot cuter in a girl to be a little fat then skinny.... At least I prefer that and I think that most of my guy friends think the same. Post conclusion: EAT!
Click to expand...

I actually don't want to be too skinny, I just want to look better than I do all the time, I afraid of being too skinny, and too fat, but I can't seem to reach a medium. I have to eat, so I can't be too skinny, but i'm afraid if I eat too much more than I do that i'll get fat, I don't even know if this makes any sense. Thanks so much for your post though. :)

And Barry this is OCD related too.
 
T

thor01

Well-known member
sleepysparrow said:
I don't know if anyone else feels the same way but I think I have a serious problem with obsessing over what I eat. I'm terrified of certain foods and afraid they will make me fat, and i'm constantly counting calories and if I eat too many I feel I have to exercise excessively just to burn them off. My diet consists of almost nothing anymore, and i'm afraid of developing an eating disorder, I had a brief experience with one in the past. This is what I eat daily:

Morning: small bowl of cereal (rice crispies) skim milk, grapes, green tea

5 glasses of water

Lunch: either a sandwich on whole wheat bread, no butter, with just lettuce and extra lean turkey or chicken, or a salad with cucumbers and tomatoes and no dressing, maybe a soup if it is just vegetables.

5 glasses of water

Dinner: steamed veg, poaced eggs, or some kind of lean meat like turkey or chicken with veg, maybe non-fat yogurt

5 glasses of water and maybe some grapes

This is all I eat all day and i'm actually really hungry all the time, I don't think i'm too skinny right now, I guess i'm afraid of being too skinny or too fat but I just can't figure out which is worse, i'm just obsessed with the way I look and the way I appear to others, it's pretty unhealthy but I can't stop. Not to mention I have a disorder where I can't fast or go without food for too long or I could go into a coma/seizures. I guess it just comes down to self hatred, no matter what I do i'll never feel good enough for myself or anyone else and I could care less about what happens to me.

Does anybody else, or has anybody else suffered from the same kind of problem?

I don't even know why i'm writing this, i'm sure no one cares anyways.
Click to expand...

I care. I know how you feel about not feeling good enough for yourself or others, but from my perspective you've really got nothing to worry about in that way because I think you're great. :)
I would actually say your diet sounds healthy to me. I would just say try not to worry about eating too much, because you're not eating loads of junk or anything, so I think eating more, with the kind of diet you have, if you're still hungry, would only do good. I really don't think you'd be in danger of becoming too fat. I would hate for the effects of that disorder you mentioned to kick in from not eating enough.
I wouldn't say I have any eating problems now, although I've always been a bit fussy with food. I used to be very fussy and at one point when I was small I had a big problem with not eating enough, and only wanting to eat the same thing all time. But now I can eat a lot, and still feel hungry. Although there are still things I like to eat, and things I wouldn't even want to try, so the fussiness is still there abit, just not near the same degree, and I have a bigger metabolism now, which has only really started to improve about 4 years ago. I do think a lot about how much healthy stuff I eat. I try and eat a few pieces of fruit everyday, and just drink water and tea. I can get a bit paranoid if I think ive eaten too much bad stuff, (not because I'm scared of getting fat, I feel I need to put on weight more than anything), or Havant been able to eat enough healthy stuff.
 
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A

AlleyCat

Well-known member
It sounds like you have a really healthy diet. I would try not to obsess so much if you eat more. I think it is a lot better to eat a bit more than to eat less. You are a beautiful lady sleepy as you are and even if you gained a few pounds that isn't going to change that. I wish you could see yourself the way we do but I know exactly what that's like to look in the mirror and not feel good enough. I don't know if this is a common problem with a lot of us that have SP or society driven, but I can completely understand and relate to how you feel. But try not to worry so much because you are beautiful just the way you are.
 
market.garden

market.garden

Well-known member
Your diet does sound pretty healthy and balanced, and you drink a good amount of water.

If I were you though, I'd see a dietitian. They can advise you much better and could be a big help.
 
Lorraine Manca

Lorraine Manca

Well-known member
If you develope anorexia, it will alter your brain. Fat is needed for the mylein sheath around the axons. Your thinking will be less clear, mentally you will be less sharp. Anorexia is a lot scarier than food is. Eat according to your appetite. It is very accurate. People get overweight by eating past that point.
 
meatcake

meatcake

1
sleepysparrow said:
i'm just obsessed with the way I look and the way I appear to others, it's pretty unhealthy but I can't stop.
I guess it just comes down to self hatred, no matter what I do i'll never feel good enough for myself or anyone else and I could care less about what happens to me.
Click to expand...

aw, i hope you can get to where you feel good about yourself, for yourself. it was something i had to learn to do the first time i went through therapy, to learn to give myself compliments, because i was so dependent on other people's views of me. it takes some practice, and it doesn't solve all your problems, but it does help you to feel a bit stronger.

my therapist would actually make me pat myself on the back if i had done some hard exposure task. it sounds silly, but it really kind of affected me, and helped me start to shift my view from being so dependent on what other people thought of me.

instead of trying to get other people to give you positive feedback, you try to learn to give more to yourself, by appreciating the things that you do.

and you can say "you did really well - you did x, and x, and x" while you do it. that actually tells your brain to reinforce doing those things, and you slowly start to want to do them, in part because of that positive feedback.

and at first it feels weird, and it's all in consciousness, but the idea is that with repetition, it sinks down into the unconscious, like learning to ride a bike, or tie your shoes.
 
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