Feel left out in groups, even online?

I have always felt like an outsider in groups, even if I am fine one-on-one with each member of the group.
What made me start this thread is because I'm in an online class where we have to work in a group. The first assignment was due this past Sunday. I posted something on Thursday, since I knew I wouldn't be available to do much Saturday or Sunday. I figured I'd get my points by posting and responding to whomever responded to me Thursday and Friday.
Nobody else had any activity as of Saturday afternoon when I left my house. I was gone all day Saturday (at work, and doing laundry at my boyfriend's since my dryer is broken). When I checked yesterday, I saw that they had done all the work on Sunday, so I wouldn't be able to participate anyway, which made me feel like a failure and left out. Also, another guy admitted to deleting my original post (I was the first person to post something, and I suspect he wanted to look like the person to start the whole thing). I am livid. I don't want to sound like a whiner, but I feel the need to explain to the instructor my lack of participation and to complain that somebody was able to delete my post. I'm worried about how I'll come across, though, and am now worried about how the rest of our group discussions will go, if these are things to come.

I know that it's easier said then done, but you really need to tell the teacher what happened, you shouldn't be disavantaged because someone else acted as a jerk. It is important to stand up for yourself. If you can gather some proof that you did in fact participate in the discussion that would be awesome, otherwise just tell your side of the story and see what happens.

Good luck ^^

I'm sure it won't sound like complaining if you explain it in a professional manner. You can write down exactly what you want to say and practice it for a while. In front of a mirror, with your eyes closed, over the phone with a counselor, sing it as a song-be creative with it and it might even be fun. That's cheesy, but whatever works. Then take a deep breath before you talk to your instructor. The instructor won't have any reason to hold it against you.

Thanks. I ended up emailing the instructor, and I hope that I sounded okay. I explained to her what happened, and asked if there is something I should do in the future to avoid the same situation.

I got the same grade as the rest of the group. I feel A LOT better now!

awesome! i'm glad you spoke up for yourself. how can other students delete your post? that sounds unfair.

I'm glad you spoke up for yourself. That guy has no right to delete your post. Make sure you are more assertive next time when working in a group.

That's great you e-mailed her! :thumbup: