Feel like I should just end it :/

hardlove

Member
heyy dont say that. I feel it too, everyday, for 4 months. and I will fight, as you will!! ;)

6 years ago i had a 6 month crisis, very severe of P attacks and social anxiety. and I almost cmpletely overcame that for 5 years. I was normal and happy.

Now I am really bad again, but I am still hopeful. In our heads its the end of the world and we dont see a way out...But dont give up. Always think: Its a phase. And keep fighting hard ;)
 

chev

Well-known member
I've felt this way so many times before. There have been times that I have come close to just ending it, but I somehow forced myself to keep going. Some of those times, the very next day something would make me feel like life was still worth living. Usually it wasn't anything life-changing, but they were small things that reminded me I would miss them. Try to focus on those kinds of things. No matter how small they are, sometimes they are just enough to keep on fighting for. If you ever feel like you're on the verge of giving it all up, force yourself to take a long, deep breath before you act. Maybe figure out now what "go-to" songs you could have if you ever feel like you can't take it anymore. Those are a couple of things I have to do. Stay strong!
 

Lowlight

Well-known member
If you don’t mind why don’t you talk to us about your life? Vent out what you need to be heard. People here are great at examining situations and trying to find solutions. Just keep talking to us.
 

SilentBird

Well-known member
I think you mentioned in another thread that you are 20. I had similiar feelings around about your age. But I have had quite a lot of good things happen to me since then.
 

jaim38

Well-known member
Hang in there, don't give up yet. I was in a sh*tty situation for several years but now the past is behind me and I'm moving forward. Eckhart Tolle also experienced depression and suicidal feelings but he overcame them and found insight in spirituality. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I encourage you to delve into spirituality and read self help books and hopefully something will spark your interest.
 
I don't know how to plan my suicide :( like I don't know what to write... Or what is the easiest way to do it as I can't swallow tablets :(
 

Ads7800

Well-known member
I don't know how to plan my suicide :( like I don't know what to write... Or what is the easiest way to do it as I can't swallow tablets :(

Firstly, don't begin planning it anyway. It's better to focus on any positive factors you have in life for protecting yourself. Anything: a pet, your relatives, being able to listen to your favourite music, still watching your favourite movies. You know, simple things that you like can remind you that doing anything to yourself would cause you to miss out on life's small joys.

I know this thread is getting older, so I hope you are feeling better with the time that has passed. :) :)

PS There is no easy way and overdosing on pills results in excruciating pain, as you linger on for five days while your liver breaks down. :sad::sad:
 

mariospap

Member
I feel like this, but I want to fight it. I want to believe that things will get better in the future. Try eating fresh or dried goji berries (20-30 pieces evey day), they tend to make you optimistic and happy ;)
Eat foods containing tryptophan, like ground flax seed.
 

Asphyxiatedragoon

Active member
I feel that way most of the time too. Don't do it. I tried it once and I learned that it wasn't worth it. If you want, we can chat and stuff maybe I could help? I could be your venting pillow.
 

tcwall

Member
I've felt like the OP so many times. Then I find a way to go on. Then a few months later, I'd ask myself if it was worth staying for. Was the last year? Five years? Twenty?

But, I keep hanging on. Hoping to figure out how to be at peace with myself. Hope that things will turn around, and I can actually appreciate it this time.

Hope. That's the answer. Hope will get you by. That is the only thing that gets me through. We think it's gone. It isn't. Most of the time, it's just buried.
 

MBinMN

Well-known member
I too have felt this way many times in life. I am 41. What I have learned is that deep dark place you are in doesn't last. It does go away it really does. Get some rest or if it gets overwhelming and to the point you truly feel you have no choice go to the ER right away. Hospital will help you. It has helped me.
I have learned first hand what suicide does to a family as my nephew on his 25th birthday last September took his own life, and the day after his funeral my sister (his mother) took her own life. We are all devastated with wondering why as we loved them both so much :(
 

ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
I plan to write on this topic in the near future. I too once thought I was a major failure. For now, I can tell you once you change your perspective on what success is and means, you will change your life for the better. Hint: Has nothing to do with material possessions and everything to do with effort...........this statement requires a lot of clarification. Once I'm able to sit down and spend some time to reflect on my thoughts and experiences, I will write more.
Hang in there!!
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
I'm enjoying life at times, I have things I fear losing. Like yesterday watching the super moon and pink moon beams at dawn
 

Bo592

Well-known member
I remember when my mother pass away I had it with the world and wanted to end my life. I had a knife I sleep with under my pillow I pretend like it was the key and my heart was the key whole the only way off of this nightmare was to kill myself. My mother was the only person who gave me the time of day and she let me vent my emotions when every I felt like it. But now she was gone and the rest of my family hated me because they had know idea what social phobia was I kept wanting to kill myself in tell finally. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------I had a talk with my grandmother who told me a story about my mother who was troubled by a boyfriend along time ago who wanted to kill him self with a knife the same way I was going to do it to which frighten me I did not every want to act like someone who hurt my mother. she said that he threaten to kill him self if she left him. grandmother told me that he hurt her very much. after that I did not know what to do I did not want to hurt my mother`s` spirit by killing myself anymore but still I wanted a reason to keep going in life So I told myself maybe instead of killing myself with a knife. I would just kill myself by taking the risk that I was afraid to take in life.
 
I opened up on another forum's chatroom (first time on that site) when I got asked how I felt that day.. and I was drunk and told the truth.. "im unhappy and I just wish I was dead..." and although I told the truth, I did not intend to commit suicide or harm myself in any way.. but the next day the police knocked on my door and said they got a report from usa that I intended to kill myself... and im from europe.. so the moderators apparantly leaked my info.. so just be aware what you say online.. you are being watched.. although the cops only wanted to talk/help I still feel like an idiot and told them I have been dealing with alcohol problems lately.. at least this was a wake up call and I have been sober since that day (2 weeks now)

EDIT: in case anyone wants to report me once again, im not gonna kill myself!!
 
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