found a way 2 make girls like me - Page 2

no1 · 06-01-2009, 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by social_phobia2008

Ye, i noticed that too, the more you seem ''not interested'' in a girl, the more she seems interested in you.

Im gonna tell a little story from a curch that has been said to do wonders for couples, lonley guys/girls that though they had a curse or witchcraft has been done to them to prevent mariage. Anyway..I attend to this church for some time now.

There are a lot of youngsters coming here, comparaed to other churches were mainly old people go. So it makes staying here less tiresome and boring, although u have to stay like 4 hours standing upright for the full ceremony (dont know if this is the word, but whatever).

So, as i said, there are many young girls who, judging by their looks, you would think they should have no problem in getting a boys attention, but still, even now i cant understand what is their problem. The priest reads papers with everyone wish and nearly 90 % of them are wanting a boyfrind.

Lol, i would ask evry one of them why they cant get a boyfriend cause most of them are hotties. Anyway, im divagating too much.

So, when i get bored, i use to stare at one, and after a few seconds, she notices and looks me back in the eyes. I switch my view and look elsewhere. Probbably she is thinking something like: this boy is digging me, i should do something. So she starts staring at me. I see that with the corner of my eye and look at her. When our sights meet, she starts smiling.

Thats when the fun begins

I look at her for like 2 secs, then switch views again, not smiling back. By this moments she is really confused, saying in her head like: wtf, i thought she liked me, could i be wrong ? she stared at me for a long enough time.

As we wonder around the curche's hall for the varios rituals that are perfomed there, she tries to get close to me to look in my eyes again and smile, just to let me know that she is interested. And the more i ignore her, the more she tries to grab my attention.

Witch brings me to my conclusion again: the more you seem ''not interested'' in a girl, the more she seems interested in you.

Unfortunately...playing this mind game brings momentary satisfaction that u can get a girls attention, but a long term dissapointment that u cant bring things a little further with her, due to social anxiety... :(

The Only reason why it works, is because it makes her question herself, so she tries to prove herself. It's called the FREEZE OUT. or snubbing yea.. it makes them want to prove themselves to you, but doesn't necessarily mean they are more into you. It's just they can confuse themselves by trying to prove themselves to you and actually think they like you.

big ****ing lol because they asked for it by ignoring us guys. now we aren't stroking their egos as much and they are like 'wth'? and they want to get your attention for another stroke of the ego.

hopefully not all women are like this.

women gotta stop generalizing so much. and men too.

thor01 · 06-02-2009, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gsmax5

I already never look at girls (seriously, I'm always super scared they will think I'm a creepo). Unfortunately, I'm not so lucky as to have girls checking me out. :(

You summed up my feeling and problem exactly.

I always look when they can't see me looking, but feel if we make eye contact that she'll think of me as creepy and lusting or whatever, I feel you really can't win in this situation, because my pretending to ignore never gets me any where, like someone else mentioned: I feel like if one saw me looking at them they'd think I was weird, and if I try the "ignoring" like usual, thinking "she'll check me out if I do this", she assumes I'm not interested at all, and nothing will happen

no1 · 06-02-2009, 12:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thor01

You summed up my feeling and problem exactly.

I always look when they can't see me looking, but feel if we make eye contact that she'll think of me as creepy and lusting or whatever, I feel you really can't win in this situation, because my pretending to ignore never gets me any where, like someone else mentioned: I feel like if one saw me looking at them they'd think I was weird, and if I try the "ignoring" like usual, thinking "she'll check me out if I do this", she assumes I'm not interested at all, and nothing will happen

yep same here. only I don't think that what I do will make her seem interested. or maybe I do just subconsciously.

Kinetik · 06-13-2009, 05:55 PM

There's nothing wrong with looking at a girl you find attractive, as long as it's not leery or excessive. Everyone looks, and in fact, I would argue that if you're not even sexually aggressive enough to openly check out a girl, that you're probably not interesting to her in the least. You need to have at least some assertiveness to get anywhere in life, and that includes interactions with the opposite sex. All this not-looking business is just another symptom of trying too hard - too much internalizing - that we with SA are often so guilty of. Just do what feels natural.

klytus · 06-13-2009, 06:31 PM

Quote:

I'm always super scared they will think I'm a creepo

And that for a good reason. It has happened to me many times that I have been literally yelled at for looking at someone in a way that particular person perceived as "creepy", apparently. Even if it was just for a moment. It must be my face, or my eyes, I don't know. The girls in one of my high-schools back than would systematically isolate me socially by telling stories about me, like I was "gay and into sodomy with male family members", and make it clear to me how low of a life I must be, because I apparently had "eyes like a pervert". Of course, it was finest bullying and none of it true.

Still, those are stories I will never forget. Talking to women in real-life any more intimately than professionally is almost impossible for me - and I fear looking at them, hence I usually desist. I also fear opening them doors and helping them in any other way, because (you perhaps don't believe it) I have been yelled at and sometimes physically pushed away for trying to help, sometimes they would just look at me mad and walk away without saying a word.

Sometimes I wonder who the mentally sick one is.

PunkRotten · 06-13-2009, 07:38 PM

I think you are right pothead. Ive had girls look at me funny because I didnt seem like I was interested in them, so they thought something was wrong. Maybe it bothered them that I wasnt eyeballing them like every guy does. Truth is, even some girls who are pretty and get alot of attention, dont do it for me. I guess maybe their attitude plays a part of it.

mimi1988 · 06-15-2009, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by social_phobia2008

Ye, i noticed that too, the more you seem ''not interested'' in a girl, the more she seems interested in you.

Im gonna tell a little story from a curch that has been said to do wonders for couples, lonley guys/girls that though they had a curse or witchcraft has been done to them to prevent mariage. Anyway..I attend to this church for some time now.

There are a lot of youngsters coming here, comparaed to other churches were mainly old people go. So it makes staying here less tiresome and boring, although u have to stay like 4 hours standing upright for the full ceremony (dont know if this is the word, but whatever).

So, as i said, there are many young girls who, judging by their looks, you would think they should have no problem in getting a boys attention, but still, even now i cant understand what is their problem. The priest reads papers with everyone wish and nearly 90 % of them are wanting a boyfrind.

Lol, i would ask evry one of them why they cant get a boyfriend cause most of them are hotties. Anyway, im divagating too much.

So, when i get bored, i use to stare at one, and after a few seconds, she notices and looks me back in the eyes. I switch my view and look elsewhere. Probbably she is thinking something like: this boy is digging me, i should do something. So she starts staring at me. I see that with the corner of my eye and look at her. When our sights meet, she starts smiling.

Thats when the fun begins

I look at her for like 2 secs, then switch views again, not smiling back. By this moments she is really confused, saying in her head like: wtf, i thought she liked me, could i be wrong ? she stared at me for a long enough time.

As we wonder around the curche's hall for the varios rituals that are perfomed there, she tries to get close to me to look in my eyes again and smile, just to let me know that she is interested. And the more i ignore her, the more she tries to grab my attention.

Witch brings me to my conclusion again: the more you seem ''not interested'' in a girl, the more she seems interested in you.

Unfortunately...playing this mind game brings momentary satisfaction that u can get a girls attention, but a long term dissapointment that u cant bring things a little further with her, due to social anxiety... :(

I'll admit, I'm guilty of such doings lol. I consider myself a fairly attractive young woman. I don't have a problem attracting men; just a problem w/ hookin up with 'em lol. In high school a lot of boys seemed to be crazy about me. I'd sometimes be mean to them just so they wouldn't like me lol. I felt bad about doing it, but my anxiety would get so bad, I just wanted them to stop talkin to me! On the 1 hand, I felt elated that ppl actually liked me! But on the otherhand, I hated it bcus I felt that if they had actually gotten to know me, they'd realize I was pathetic & weird. (rather be seen as mean than weird & pathetic lol). I'm goin 2 much into detail. Anyway, out of several hundred boys at school, I only obessed over ONE! This ONE particular guy would speak to me 1 day & ignore me the next. Sometimes I'd catching him staring at me, but whenever I'd look at him he'd pretend to be looking elsewhere. 1 day I saw him the mall & he pretended like he wasn't sure I was the right person (yea right!). Anyway, I was gettin ready to write my # down for him but b4 I could he quickly demanded, "No! I dont want ur number; ur gonna call me." The guy I'm speakin of is dead now. We NEVER hooked up. Deep down I KNEW he didn't give a s*** about me, yet I was (literally) obsessed over him??? His ignoring (and even treating me like crap on 1 or 2 instaces) actually made me like him... more? I'm not sure why females are this way, lol. But some of us just are.

no1 · 06-16-2009, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by release

You guys are so daft. My god. You could over-analyse a tea pot.

You know... things like this actually SHOULD be talked about because the majority of women ARE this way and most don't even know why.
And I'm telling you I swear the gender roles of this society are completely mixed up so much so that people are left very lonely simply because they don't "fit" in with these ABSURD images of gender roles.

no1 · 06-16-2009, 10:17 PM

well, another reason why girls may act this way is this: when you do this, it tricks their mind to think that they have an "obsession" over you. Ie, you play your part in the act of this "obsession" and she might think "omg I'm obsessed about him because whenever I look at him he doesn't look at me!" Kinda like... when you get your subconscious to believe in something, and then you go about believing in something even though it's not true, but for you it is. Or the women just go crazy thinking about it that they start to believe they are obsessed... so they think they are obsessed...making them obsessed!