Giving Anxiety to Others

I need to know if anyone else experiences this, because for me, it's the worst hell imaginable to live through. Everywhere I go, every person I'm forced to interact with, even my family and friends, are significantly affected by my mere presence.

My anxiety has become a contagion that latches onto everyone I encounter, and I have an entire guilt complex now thanks to it. It makes even attempting to overcome my SA a million times worse.

Before you say it's likely all in my head, I know beyond a doubt that it's not. Wherever I go, people get the same nervous ticks I do. The twitching of the head, where my head would jolt back as if it's been tazed, is the worst and most noticeable. Even though this one doesn't happen to me, coughing and clearing of the throat is what happens ALL THE TIME, wherever I go places.

What explanation could be had for this? I heard that when one notices that another is uncomfortable, their empathy results in them doing the same. But this happens even in movie theaters, where no one can see me.

It's surreal and fantastic and makes no sense, and my life a living hell because of it. I want to apologize to everyone wherever I go just for being alive. I feel like a demon, a walking transmitter of negativity.

Is there any way to alleviate this, or at least my perception of it, so that I can at least try to face my fears? Does anyone else experience this?

I'm glad you posted, because it reminded me of some interesting things. Some current psychology articles have noted that some people are more sensitive to the emotions or expressions of others, which makes life a lot more difficult, because all humans wear masks of some sort to shield their true emotions. I know that's true of myself. While some of us can use subtle behavioral clues to close a deal, for the rest of us, 'mirror neurons'-the nerves that help humans read each other-just make life uncomfortable. Yes, others can read you, and feel what you do. Fear is a contagious emotion for reasons of survival, and there is even some science that links spreading it to more than just expressions, but also biochemical signals. I vaguely remember an article that said fear spreads more easily than the other emotions due to our evolutionary response. Great.

Clearing ones throat may be an extension of the mind-body connection. As an asthmatic, I clear my throat under duress, after laughing, or when my immune system is compromised. Paying attention to it makes it worse, so I've learned to accept it. I found some naturopathic herbs as well to help it, because a lot of work I do over the phone.

I often wonder if my own anxiety transmits through a room. I think back to school a lot at my own perspective. Am I responsible for spreading scary biochemicals? LOL! I know I spread negativity sometimes, but I would also like to spread some joy, if people even notice. It's terrible you feel this way, but you're not alone.

Thanks I'm glad I'm not crazy lol, but that's the scary part. Knowing how badly I affect people and not having the slightest inkling on what to do about it. I want to stop this more than stopping the SA itself. I get really down about this, I obsess over it because I can't go anywhere without it happening. Mirror neurons is what I think it comes down to, our wiring to pick up on other people's vibes. It's a good thing probably, but NOT when you have SA. And you're right, fear is likely the most contagious since we're wired to recognize it most to help us survive. But when the fear is irrational, like you said, it just makes life uncomfortable for some of us. I just take solace in the fact that I can't affect people the way I think I do, most of it is imaginary. And at least for others, they don't have to deal with being uncomfortable their entire damn lifetime lol.

You can spread fear. It's instinctual. If someone sees someone else afraid of something they become more cautious around it and can even become frightened of it as well.

I remember being told about an experiment using monkeys (or maybe it was chimps). They had a bunch of monkeys that had never seen a snake before and weren't afraid of snakes. Then they showed a video of a monkey being afraid of a snake. They put the monkeys in the same room as a snake and they were somewhat afraid of the snake even though they weren't before. But they did the same experiment but instead of a snake they used a bouquet of flowers and a video of a monkey being afraid of a bouquet of flowers and the monkeys didn't become afraid of flowers. So fear can spread as long as it's logical.

And anxiety is a fear response.

I probably got a few details wrong of the experiment. I heard it in a lecture a couple years ago in a psychology lecture

This is a common phenomenon. However, in my experience only a minority react like that. It shows that anyone can have an episode of SA under the right circumstances. If SA is not your fault, then neither is the reactions created in others. You are right to be concerned, though. I suppose you could avoid the people who are affected in this way; write them a letter instead etc.