Good Looking Guys

4tune

New member
Hi, im jus wondering why so many good looking guys are so shy? Most of the good looking guys i know are realy shy and the ugly ones are insanly confident. Anyone else know what im talking about?

I was told its quite common for good looking people to be shy when it comes to dating because if thier rejected they doubt themselves where as the ugly ones dont realy care because they know thier nothing to look at.

Any thoughts?
 
Maybe ugly people (I don't like saying that!) feel they have nothing to offer anyone from the way they look, so feel the need to be outspoken and "act" confident.
 

Reholla

Well-known member
Well I agree there are shy goodlooking guys, but theres also cocky arrogant ones.

Ive found the reason why attractive people can also be really shy is because they are expected to have it all and be happy around peolple. Like society has high expectations of them and they feel pressure to amount to what they are already perceived as.

But looks and whether youre outgoing or shy are really different. Maybe some people's overlap, but not as many as you may think. Plus shyness is also genetic....just like their good looks ;)
 

sugarcake

Member
Well, I've noticed the opposite. All the good-looking guys seem really loud and outspoken, while the quiet guys are kind of, um, well let's just say not very good-looking. Well, I have met a few really good-looking quiet guys, but on the whole that doesn't seem to be the case for me.
 

PunkyMonkey

Well-known member
I wish that were the way things seemed to me. The good looking guys always seem to be the loud, obnoxious ones. The shy ones never seem to be that, um, "great". There are a lot of loud, obnoxious, ugh, "ugly" boys too....but if I ever meet a shy guy, they never seem to be that attractive. It's too bad because I think somehow shy people are always more appealing to me, now.

I guess that's not completely true. One of my best friends is a really good looking kid, and he's shy. Too bad he's not the kind of person I really like.... Well, it's funny, I thought he was attractive and whatever only before I got to know him. Now I can really only see him as a friend. Ha, it's all so complicated.
 
I have no idea if I am good looking, but I am quite shy, I find most of it is fear of rejection, and sometimes it's fear of acceptance because then you have the responsibility of taking the girl out, and with a social phobia that can weigh quite heavy on ones mind.
 

Hussein

Member
I've seen that a lot of ugly but confident dudes think they are goodlooking. I have a cousin, named ash and I would say that he is ugly but he is extremely confident and thinks he is goodlooking. I believe that these guys are just naturally confident.
 

Hussein

Member
phantom said:
i dont think shyness is something genetic

I dont want to disappoint you but that strictly isnt true. check out

http://www.genomenewsnetwork.org/articles/04_00/shyness.shtml

and the wikipedia entry:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shyness

in the wikipedia entry it says that the genes for shyness are also linked to anxiety problems and OCD and both of these problems occur in my family. My mum was shy and my dad was always been an OCD sort of guy who was very violent until he went on medication.

The way I think of shyness is similar to the way I think of obesity. Just as obesity is linked to lower metabolic rate and a huge appetite, shyness is linked to lower serotonin production. But fat people have turned thin through the right diet and the excercise.

-H
 

Diluted_Acid

Well-known member
I aint biased, or completely modest, however i do have a very nice face, and a fine body compostition for a guy. I find sometimes it can be harsh being fairly good looking because, you can feel as if too much attention is being brought on to you, and expectations too. I'm always being approached by girls, however my anxiety kicks in within seconds, and they end up dissapointed and wandering whats wrong with me! What also hurts, is how despite being somewhat attractive, no one will ever approach you and tell you that, but only behind your back, and that can really hurt. Also, good looks are very personal, and i could even go as far as to say everyone is good looking. It's aesthetics, and i guess in the end i'm only considering myself good looking based on how i honestly feel about myself, and what others have told me as i grew up. Sometimes i wish adults and such would have not made me feel so special due to my looks, because in the longterm it's really brought feelings of pressure, and high expectations, which have strongly led me to feel my personality and all can't live up. Hope no one thinks, i think i'm top shit or somethin, coz i really don't, i know my flaws, and thats why i'm here, to seek help, and try help others, and relate.
 

maggie

Well-known member
Diluted_Acid said:
I aint biased, or completely modest, however i do have a very nice face, and a fine body compostition for a guy. I find sometimes it can be harsh being fairly good looking because, you can feel as if too much attention is being brought on to you, and expectations too. I'm always being approached by girls, however my anxiety kicks in within seconds, and they end up dissapointed and wandering whats wrong with me! What also hurts, is how despite being somewhat attractive, no one will ever approach you and tell you that, but only behind your back, and that can really hurt. Also, good looks are very personal, and i could even go as far as to say everyone is good looking. It's aesthetics, and i guess in the end i'm only considering myself good looking based on how i honestly feel about myself, and what others have told me as i grew up. Sometimes i wish adults and such would have not made me feel so special due to my looks, because in the longterm it's really brought feelings of pressure, and high expectations, which have strongly led me to feel my personality and all can't live up. Hope no one thinks, i think i'm top shit or somethin, coz i really don't, i know my flaws, and thats why i'm here, to seek help, and try help others, and relate.
i totally understand what you're saying...and i agree with it..i think there is pressure on a nice-looking person...or a person others consider to be good-looking... to be more out-going..personable...and flirty?...like..i can tell the look..at work..if someone considers me to be nice-looking...they look at first..like.."wow..look at her"..then, after noticing my nervousness..quirks..whatever..then it changes quickly to "whoa...what the fuck is with her" :roll:
 

pjam76

Well-known member
LOOKS...

I think good lucks can lead to high expectations, but a person who is goog looking and shy can get by because, people will like you or think good things about you without even knowing you. High expecations are sometimes a good thing to have. It drives people to do better for themselves and to prove others right or wrong.

But on theohter hand, somebody considered "ugly" by most standards and is shy at the same time, is in for a long hard road. Many people won't even notice or care to notice them. There won't be as many expectations for that person because many won't care. In the long run, some people get through this, but many become loners and depressed because nobody really gives a crap about them, if they do good or bad.
 

Richey

Well-known member
i find this thread very depressing, or i feel that way after reading it, as im not ugly but i dont have model good looks and i dont have the body of what people seem to be describing, im also quite shy so essentially there is no hope for me
 

Oli025

Well-known member
yea.. there may be a bunch of good looking guys
that rely too much on their look and just love the "love" thy get
and may not want to screw this up by not being on par with their brhavior.

possible.
 
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