Have you given up on life?

jryden

jryden

Well-known member
Do you find that even when something positive happens in your life, it doesn't make a difference...you're just done?

That's how I am. Even if you gave me the best news, gave me everything I wanted, it wouldn't matter. It's like I'm mentally done with life. Like I've mentally committed suicide so I just don't care anymore. :(
 
Hellhound

Hellhound

Super Moderator
There are moments when I feel like that, but I'm trying hard not to give up. I still have some hope left.
 
Sacrament

Sacrament

Well-known member
Why do you feel that way? Good things are good. You should enjoy them one by one, and let them pile up into a big mountain of happiness.

What a dumb thing I just said. But it's true, though. If you're depressed, seek help. Life doesn't have to be that way. You just need to have an open mind and heart to all the pretty little things around you.
 
E

Etbow23

Well-known member
I obviously haven't given up, because I'm still trying for things. But in some respects I've given up. Like I've given up in terms of trying to find a job right now. Bleh.
 
theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
Usually i manage to feel quite hopeful about life, unbelievably, in spite of nothing ever changing, and my main problems remaining as they are. When i'm down, like i am now (depression) i do feel totally hopeless really, but i still keep trying, why i don't know. Maybe i am unable to give up? (like a dog with a possum in its mouth, shaking the hell out of it). maybe i scared that the moment i DO actually "give up" for real, then i'll do myself in, so i continually run from & fight that scenario?. In last few days, of increasing depression, rather than giving up (which doesn't seem a viable option), it is more making me investigate the unknown, as clearly that is where my salvation lies, so that is where i feel propelled towards more and more these days. I mean, if all else has failed, that's all there really is - the unknown, what i don't yet know, maybe what i never know.
 
Lowlight

Lowlight

Well-known member
I haven’t given up on “life” because I never signed up for “life” in the first place. If I recall correctly from my business law class there has to be mutual assent between all parties to enter into a contract. Nobody asked me to enter this world, so I don’t feel any obligation to meet anyone’s standards but my own.

I don’t party. I don’t drink or do drugs. I don’t go to the mall or movies on the weekend. I don’t have a girlfriend. I don’t really interact with people at all. And you know what?!? That doesn’t make me less of a person!

I used to think that I had to fit a certain role or personality to be happy. I really thought that to be happy I had to have tons of friends, get invited to parties, and be the best at every activity I tried. While it is healthy to have some dreams, it isn’t healthy to beat yourself up over your inability to meet those goals. I had a couple friends in high school who I didn’t appreciate as much as I should have because I was so worried about being appealing to everyone. I met a few people in college who I didn’t bond with to my satisfaction because I was too depressed about not being as independent and interesting as they were.

These were years and people who I passed up on because I chose to be depressed. Maybe “chose” isn’t the best word, because at the time I didn’t feel I had any choice about my situation. I allowed my environment (peers, teachers, parents, television, and the like) to dictate to me what I needed to be happy. No more. Now I listen to myself. I no longer have to strive for other people’s goals to feel happy.

If I ever want to get a girlfriend or go to parties then I will have to work on those skills when the time arises. Today, though, I have learned that I don’t need these things to be happy. I can be myself, no matter how weird or odd I may seem to other people. It’s my life, and it is my responsibility to live it to my satisfaction.
 
S

SmileMore

Well-known member
There have been times where i've felt like i'd rather not exist but recently i've been trying to be more positive about things. Do you suffer from depression? Maybe you should get yourself some help. Life's too short to be miserable all the time Try and see what good there is instead of being so negative.
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
Lowlight said:
I haven’t given up on “life” because I never signed up for “life” in the first place. If I recall correctly from my business law class there has to be mutual assent between all parties to enter into a contract. Nobody asked me to enter this world, so I don’t feel any obligation to meet anyone’s standards but my own.

I don’t party. I don’t drink or do drugs. I don’t go to the mall or movies on the weekend. I don’t have a girlfriend. I don’t really interact with people at all. And you know what?!? That doesn’t make me less of a person!

I used to think that I had to fit a certain role or personality to be happy. I really thought that to be happy I had to have tons of friends, get invited to parties, and be the best at every activity I tried. While it is healthy to have some dreams, it isn’t healthy to beat yourself up over your inability to meet those goals. I had a couple friends in high school who I didn’t appreciate as much as I should have because I was so worried about being appealing to everyone. I met a few people in college who I didn’t bond with to my satisfaction because I was too depressed about not being as independent and interesting as they were.

These were years and people who I passed up on because I chose to be depressed. Maybe “chose” isn’t the best word, because at the time I didn’t feel I had any choice about my situation. I allowed my environment (peers, teachers, parents, television, and the like) to dictate to me what I needed to be happy. No more. Now I listen to myself. I no longer have to strive for other people’s goals to feel happy.

If I ever want to get a girlfriend or go to parties then I will have to work on those skills when the time arises. Today, though, I have learned that I don’t need these things to be happy. I can be myself, no matter how weird or odd I may seem to other people. It’s my life, and it is my responsibility to live it to my satisfaction.
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I'm the same in that i don't party etc, don't have friends, never had a girlfriend. I tried to be like ''everybody else'' and go to clubs with workmates but i felt i was being a fake by pretending to like something i hate doing. I wish i could be as positive as you though as i spend Friday and Saturday nights feeling depressed that everyone else is out having fun. I feel that life has and is passing me by.
 
angelcat

angelcat

Member
Yeah I have felt that apathetic before when good things happen and I just didn't care. Like for example last year I went on a Caribbean cruise twice and the whole time I felt very apathetic and irritable. That was back when I had severe depression. Basically my brain was in this depressive pattern and it takes practice of relearning positive behaviors and thoughts to get it back to a healthy state. Think of water eroding a rock, that is how behaviors and thoughts erode the brain. It can either be positive or negative patterns.
 
mikebird

mikebird

Banned
Lowlight said:
I haven’t given up on “life” because I never signed up for “life” in the first place. If I recall correctly from my business law class there has to be mutual assent between all parties to enter into a contract. Nobody asked me to enter this world, so I don’t feel any obligation to meet anyone’s standards but my own.
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I love reading what others say, to highlight aspects of me I haven't noticed before.

Yep. I live by tight discipline and won't follow others or do what I'm told. This comes from carefree parents who can't spot a child's mistakes, letting them free to do anything they like.

Lowlight, you might be a good manager in life... whatever that word means.

But a main problem for me is that nobody will ever listen to me. I think very different, and have very strong opinions, which people don't understand
 
Kat

Kat

Well-known member
I haven’t given up but just not letting others dictate how I should be. I’m working on an alternate lifestyle that I can be happy with.
 
razzle dazzle rose

razzle dazzle rose

Well-known member
jryden said:
It's like I'm mentally done with life. Like I've mentally committed suicide so I just don't care anymore. :(
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Sometimes I feel like that. It is a horrible feeling. But then I sort of bounce back - I am easily distracted.

Kat said:
I haven’t given up but just not letting others dictate how I should be. I’m working on an alternate lifestyle that I can be happy with.
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I think this is what I have to do as well. I want to add those elements to my life I am sure would make it better: hobbies, friends, visiting new places. I also have to come to terms that certain things I want will never be, and grieve that loss and move on. I am in the process...
 
Richey

Richey

Well-known member
No but i think i'm going to struggle being say ..a supervisor or manager at work..progressing up the ranks etc at a company(even though i try hard, i'm too shy). it seems to be suited for the really strong of esteem and ego, that's how i see it anyway, that's going to be a struggle and of course meeting a partner and eventurally buying a house, saving that deposit, its all going to be hard and then some, where as for others its just a simple thing.
 
montejocarlo

montejocarlo

Well-known member
No. I don't think it's anything I can give up on. It's primal. It's not a task that I can get tired of doing. It flows even as I resist, so I thought I'd rather not.
 
Section_31

Section_31

Well-known member
Ive given up. several times.

Its when i feel that way that i realize ive pushed myself too far, and i just need a break. And then my self care begins.

And then i try again.

Why do we fall? to learn to pick ourselves back up.
 
mikebird

mikebird

Banned
If Thinking of your library job,

I do grasp hold of interviews with an optimistic outlook, that my opportunity with change my life forever. I have a solemn in-built mechanism to get ready for huge disappointment. Not so simple as it is for all the lovely normal people.

As I write, I expect my magic phone call this morning about a special job in Oxford from 0930 or 1000, hoping for 0930. Even that hope gets me in a bad mood. When I schedule anything with anybody, anywhere, I am pinpoint sharply accurate and nowhere near the clause for... late.

Of course I expect others' delay. Deep burrowed into the full job spec.

I don't give up on life. People.
 
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