"He used to be a good guy"

Did you overhear people talking about you?

  • Yes, I did. It sucks.

    Votes: 6 66.7%

  • I think I might have.

    Votes: 3 33.3%

  • No, never. I'm not sure what people think.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • No, but I always assumed it was like this.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Total voters
    9
voodoochild16

voodoochild16

Well-known member
I don't know if very many people overheard friends or people that know you say this behind your back, but I heard it once.

I was running in gym class and quietly moved up on some guys in my class and of course.. yea.

Then it's like "oh!, sorry we didn't know you were behind us".

Did you ever experience something similar?. Leave a comment below. If you were outgoing once, then suffered later on during your teenage years, I know what that's like, that's for sure. It's devastating.
 
worrywort

worrywort

Well-known member
Yea it's happened a couple of times for me. Both to my face though, which I guess I appreciate?!

Once back in school, when I was about 15, a school mate said to me "what happened to the old you? You used to be so much more fun"

and more recently, at work a couple years ago, when I was about 31, a colleague said to me "you've changed. You used to be so happy-go-lucky, always willing to muck in and help out".

The latter comment I don't think is true, and the person who said it to me is an idiot, so I just discounted it. But I think the former probably had a point.
 
voodoochild16

voodoochild16

Well-known member
worrywort said:
Yea it's happened a couple of times for me. Both to my face though, which I guess I appreciate?!

Once back in school, when I was about 15, a school mate said to me "what happened to the old you? You used to be so much more fun"

and more recently, at work a couple years ago, when I was about 31, a colleague said to me "you've changed. You used to be so happy-go-lucky, always willing to muck in and help out".

The latter comment I don't think is true, and the person who said it to me is an idiot, so I just discounted it. But I think the former probably had a point.
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Yeah, I think in the end it is good to know, that a person notices and we get to hear what they think, otherwise we wouldn't know anything. Assuming can really drive me nuts, but I've heard enough evidence to know I'm right.

The problem is the people that are so used to us that if you even mention that you used to be "that guy", they ask "what are you talking about?", because it was years ago.

For me, it was in 2004 that I changed so dramatically. Then, 2008 is when I found out what it was.

I guess I just don't talk about it anymore with friends or family, it's just too personal. The only thing that brings me back, is beer :(.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Not exactly the same, but...

My oldest step-sister, who is white, accused me of being "humourless" when I called her out for comparing my appearance to everything from an Arab to a member of the Taliban whenever we were out in public from 2008 - 2014. I'm mixed-race, yeah... Awkward! She used the usual just trying to make ye laugh excuse, not realising that most people with laugh at some sorta jokes done sparingly. Needless to say making the joke after I just got my photo taken was the last straw for me,

But yeah, I've overheard my family call me anti-social, a loner, autistic. Even questioning whether I'm gay, which I always had the "If I was gay, I'd be happy" comeback at the ready. :giggle: But aside, from that it's just makes me want to withdraw from being around people. Because there's no point, trying to win people over when with me they've made a judgment upon my character by merely looking at me.
 
Jessquietgirl

Jessquietgirl

Well-known member
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voodoochild16

voodoochild16

Well-known member
Graeme1988 said:
Not exactly the same, but...

My oldest step-sister, who is white, accused me of being "humourless" when I called her out for comparing my appearance to everything from an Arab to a member of the Taliban whenever we were out in public from 2008 - 2014. I'm mixed-race, yeah... Awkward! She used the usual just trying to make ye laugh excuse, not realising that most people with laugh at some sorta jokes done sparingly. Needless to say making the joke after I just got my photo taken was the last straw for me,

But yeah, I've overheard my family call me anti-social, a loner, autistic. Even questioning whether I'm gay, which I always had the "If I was gay, I'd be happy" comeback at the ready. :giggle: But aside, from that it's just makes me want to withdraw from being around people. Because there's no point, trying to win people over when with me they've made a judgment upon my character by merely looking at me.
Click to expand...

Yeah, I pretty much have to pretend to be what people want me to be if I wanted to receive good feedback. I'm bad at pretending. I pretend better when I drink beer, because I'm more relaxed then.

Thanks for sharing dude, and let's hope and pray for the future :).
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
voodoochild16 said:
Yeah, I pretty much have to pretend to be what people want me to be if I wanted to receive good feedback. I'm bad at pretending. I pretend better when I drink beer, because I'm more relaxed then.
Click to expand...

Same here, especially with family. And I hate it - it's so fake. Pretending to be happy when I'm not. Pretending to agree with someone else's opinion on a topic ah've given little thought about. Pretending to like something just so people will like me, be it a certain type of music, movie or TV show. Pfft... Sod that!

voodoochild16 said:
Thanks for sharing dude, and let's hope and pray for the future :).
Click to expand...

No problem. :thumbup: And, aye, let's hope for the future. :)
 
morrowrd

morrowrd

Active member
I've discovered someone I trusted, and confided in telling other people things I shared and did so with a negative light. Once I discovered it was happening, it made sense as to how other people were treating me. Made me feel like my wisdom was flawed by trusting someone I shouldn't have. It's affected my trust barometer. Maybe that's a good thing.
 
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