Hey would you have kids?

PhillipJFry

Well-known member
I ruined my life for having one. Not only did I make a mistake by being with the father but it was stupid that I actually wanted one. Now I'm just a unsuccessful, lazy, crazy mother who can't deal with anything, especially having a developmentally delayed child. I add an extra person to this crowded world, so stupid. I just wish I got an abortion or something happened so I can get on with just taking care of only me and not having that responsibility.

But no. I'm stupid.

Oh man, I'm sorry, that's a difficult situation.

I wish you wouldn't call yourself stupid when you're likely not, I don't know you though so I can't prove you wrong. But as far as mistakes go, having a kid is not so bad. At least your not the captain of the titanic, that guy messed up once and killed like 1,500 people.

I do hope that your life becomes "un-ruined" in the future, and that you and your child will be happy one day.
 

anomicdeer

Well-known member
Well, that's their life. I don't care if they lost a child. If they want one then they can keep trying. I know someone with that problem and they finally had one. You think I don't have feelings? Well, it doesn't matter anyway since I don't care about anyone elses.

I know how horrible what I said sounds. That's how much I hate myself.
 

worrywort

Well-known member
Have to say, I didn't find anything offensive about anomicdeer's post, I just though it was honest. In fact I can empathise a little. I'd imagine it's quite common that a person would regret having a child, it's seems like one of the hardest jobs in the world. Yet there seems to be a taboo about admitting that fact, but I don't think that's fair.

I do believe that, with time, it's possible to change your feeling of regret to one of genuine gratitude, where you'll come to see that having a child was a good thing to have happened to you, and I sincerely hope anomicdeer can find that place, but it's hard and I don't think there's anything wrong with a person venting their honest feelings on the matter.
 

PhillipJFry

Well-known member
Well, that's their life. I don't care if they lost a child. If they want one then they can keep trying. I know someone with that problem and they finally had one. You think I don't have feelings? Well, it doesn't matter anyway since I don't care about anyone elses.

I know how horrible what I said sounds. That's how much I hate myself.

I don't think you read what I wrote correctly, or maybe I unintentionally wrote in a way that sounded rude, if that's the case then I am sorry.
I wanted only for you to feel better, and perhaps to not hate yourself so much, I think it's okay to have the feelings you do. I wish you the best, honestly.
 

Argentum

Well-known member
I would be more likely to adopt. I have a lot of sympathy for kids who sit in orphanages or foster care until they're old enough to fend for themselves. Any future spouse would have to drag me out after I selected our one, because I'd want any one that looked at me sadly. I had the same feeling when I was at an animal shelter a few years ago and a cat literally reached out and latched onto me, and I started crying when I was home because I couldn't afford to take it with me at the time.
 
Right now, I'm pretty sure I don't want kids, but I'm too young and financially unstable for kids anyway.

In the future, I would have real trouble signing myself up for that kind of responsibility, even if I did want them. If I do end up with kids, I am convinced they would be in good hands. I have 6 younger siblings, between 2 and 20 years younger than me, and I've seen and dealt with most anything that could be involved in raising children. They would be everything to me and I would be comitted for life. I just don't want to bring about that situation.

But that is all subject to change in the coming decades.
 

bsammy

Well-known member
no way in hell would i ever have kids...i wouldnt want to pass on any of my more negative traits...no way could i manage to see my kid go through that..
 

jayfan

Well-known member
have kids but they are nothing like me which is a good thing .
never thought id get a girlfriend , never thought id get married or divorced, never thought i'd have kids, never wanted them but it just happened . i would not let it happen again .
bad experience for me . I'm a hermit , so i feel like sometimes my kids suffer because of my sa.
 
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THeCARS1979

Well-known member
I ruined my life for having one. Not only did I make a mistake by being with the father but it was stupid that I actually wanted one. Now I'm just a unsuccessful, lazy, crazy mother who can't deal with anything, especially having a developmentally delayed child. I add an extra person to this crowded world, so stupid. I just wish I got an abortion or something happened so I can get on with just taking care of only me and not having that responsibility.

But no. I'm stupid.

how developmentally delayed are they
 

worrywort

Well-known member
I don't think you read what I wrote correctly, or maybe I unintentionally wrote in a way that sounded rude, if that's the case then I am sorry.
I wanted only for you to feel better, and perhaps to not hate yourself so much, I think it's okay to have the feelings you do. I wish you the best, honestly.

anomicdeer and I were replying to another user who's posts have subsequently been removed :thumbup:
 

Metal_isthe_Answer

Well-known member
Fangirls stop and look when they pass Garrus, too, albeit for very different reasons.

(or do they?)
This was one of my favorite bits:
Garrus: Nobody would give me a mirror. How bad is it?
Shepard: Hell Garrus, you were always ugly, slap some face paint on there and no one will even notice.
Garrus: Ha-ah! Don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holding together as it is. Some women find facial scars attractive. Mind you, most of those women are krogan...
 

fate12321

Well-known member
Nope. Never. I'm not sure why, but it's the way this world is heading that makes me not want to have an offspring.
 
I honestly don't know, i suppose there is a chance i might in the future. Based on how i feel right now, i'd have to say no. I'm not capable of being a father just yet, i have much growing to do as a person. There's also the fact that i'm unemployed and have absolutely no idea what i'm going to do with my life. It also brings up another question. What kind of world would i be bringing them into?
 

w*n*c*a*m

Well-known member
I want kids. I'll just pray that they don't get my anxiety trait. I am the total opposite of my husband so I hope they get more of their father's personality.

The only thing I hope they could get from me is my artistry and intellect. (Not saying that my hubby is dumb. I'm just more of the analytical thinker and bookworm)
 

Regret93

Well-known member
If you insist on owning a child to maintain your inflated ego, then please adopt. I would never bring another human onto this earth. It's a disgusting process, not to mention destructive as all hell. I'm a nice guy, I suppose.
 

Odo

Banned
I go back and forth on this one.

I think I probably would like to, actually. I really like kids and in theory know how to raise them, having been a teacher and meeting a lot of children and seeing what kind of parents they have. Of course, I also worry about not being able to be enough of a leader/parental figure.

I think it's getting to the point where I would need to have them soon, though. I don't have the biological clock problem that women do, but I'd still prefer to have a baby when I still have the energy to raise him or her right. I'd like to be more financially and emotionally stable as well... you can't be self-absorbed and unable to deal with your own shit when you have a kid. On the other hand, I've also learned that being responsible for someone else can really bring that out in a person.

There are a lot of reasons why I wouldn't want to have kids right at this exact moment, however... it's hard enough to meet one person let alone someone who would provide a loving family atmosphere and wouldn't clash with me over how to raise the kids or live life or other things of that nature.
 
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Hi there! I have a boy he's 2 years old now, he isn't genetically mine but I personally know his parents. His mom, I could say have undergo a series of depression episodes but I don't really care if my son will genetically acquire his mom's traits. Because I also have social anxieties and have been depressed in the past and I know how exactly to cope up with it now. Maybe my role would be to shape him up to be a positive,outgoing and confident boy. I've been reading a lot of stuff about coping up with anxiety on early stages and I would always be there to guide him all throughout.
 
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