Hi SPW family! This is me in detail.

Hope I am posting in the right section. This is only my second time being on a online forum. Poker forum was my first one

I had my first panic attack about 4 years ago when I was dehydrated and walking in downtown Los Angeles in 100+ degree weather when I started to get dizzy (it was very crowded) I ran to an alley and now know I was in fight or flight mode but I was, I guess fighting it? I had huge adrenaline rushes, racing thoughts my vision was blurred and I couldn't stop gripping the ground with my fingers. Finally a homeless man helped me up and sat me in the shade. Before he helped me I could barely see a family walk across the alley and they were saying wow and one of them laughed and that heightened the attack to unbelievable fear. But after the homeless man helped me to the shade he told me I will be all right to relax and I just needed to get out of the sun. I believed in him 100 percent because I had to. After what seemed like 3 hours (probably 10 minutes) I finally could see normally. Made it back to my car.
So from that time on I slowly developed agoraphobia but I DO NOT have anxiety attacks whenever I am at home or whenever I finally get to my destination, it’s only when I start driving in the beginning of the day or if I am at a place that’s hard to get back to my car. After I fight the panic attack by breathing but most of all by learning THAT THE PANIC ATTACK IS A NUTURAL MECHANISM FOR SERVIVAL AND THAT ITS JUST THAT MY MECHANISM (AMAGADALA) IS SET ON HIGH AND THAT I AM NOT GOING CRAZY ITS THE FIGHT OR FLIGHT HAPPENING (if I am wrong please correct me) I am able to relax myself But I have to fight it every day in the beginning of driving or if I am going to do something that’s going to be difficult. Note I cannot drive with anyone in the car because it’s too much pressure on me to not have a panic attack in front of them. I have read that cognitive behavioral thinking helps.
FOR ME NOW IT’S THE FEAR OF THE ADRENALINE RUSH PEEKING AND STAYING THAT WAY FOR HOW LONG? I DON’T KNOW! That’s my new fear now because I know what it is now and I know I am not going to go crazy. But if the adrenaline rush stays going on strong during that panic attack could I permanently become mentally disabled to the point where I lost my mind (like you see people on the streets talking to themselves ?
THAT’S THE TRICK, THE THOUGHTS THAT I SNEAK INTO MY MIND AND THAT’S WHERE I LOSE MY
MENTAL EDGE OVER MY THOUGHTS, CAUSE AT FIRST I AM KNOWING THE FACT THAT I AM ONLY IN
THE FIGHT OR FLIGHT AND IT WILL PASS BUT THEN THAT SNEAKY THOUGHT COMES TO MY MIND, “IS
THE ADRENELINE RUSH GOING TO STAY THAT WAY AND I WILL FREAK OUT?” THEN I AM IN FULL PANIC
MODE. COOL THING NOW AFTER LEARNING WHATS GOING ON EVEN AFTER I TRICKED MYSELF TO A
PANIC ATTACK MY ATTACKS ONLY LAST LIKE 1 SECOND (A STRONG 1 SECOND WAVE OF FEAR THEN
IMMEDIATLEY GOES AWAY AND I FEEL COMPLETLEY GOOD . ALSO BECAUSE I KNOW WHATS
HAPPENING TO ME MOST OF THE TIME WHEN I LEAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE NOT STRESSFULL I
ANTICAPATE THE PANIC ATTACK BUT IT NEVER COMES AND I SMILE AND LAUGH ON PURPOSE TO PUT
ME IN A STRONG POSITIVE MOOD AND THAT WORKS TO. ALSO RIGHT AFTERWARDS I’LL PUT ON A
GOOD SONG AND SING AND THINK ABOUT A POSITIVE FUN TIME IN MY LIFE.
I still am very sociable still my old self but I need to get this agoraphobia out of the way. My general doctor prescribed me Celexa but I am too scared to take it. I was thinking of asking my doctor if the pharmacy could break up my 20mg to 2mg and 5 mg and 10mg to work myself up slowly on it?
I Take vitamins/ I exercise allot and eat correctly and drink the right beneficial drinks (sea salt and water etc) but it hasn’t helped with agoraphobia.
My panic attacks feel as followed,, I have a adrenaline rush in my head (no chest pains) and fear comes with it or right after it comes like in waves and I get dizzy which now that I know what it is, I don’t have the bad thoughts that come with the panic attack but I still get scared because of the adrenaline rush and being dizzy in my car or public places. I can stop one from coming now because of the knowledge of what is happening but I would like to go to cognitive thinking to add to my arsenal of being mentally strong against it.
Questions for you,
Will I need medication, should I use medication? I was thinking klopotine instead of Celexa because I don’t want to take the chance of having a side effect of a panic attack while I am at home! Because I never had one at home and I don’t want to open that dreadful door!
Would breaking up the celxa close to 2mg be ok?
Should I keep doing what I do now and that is I have xanax in my pocket for security and I just go out and slowly expose myself to those places that I get a panic attack from and that seems to work but it is mentally tiring. I truly believe this might be the best way with cognitive behavioral thinking but in the morning with bad sleep I cannot make it to the cbt program without having to fight a panic attack off. I seem to be very weak in the morning mentally.
Thanks again for your time and hope to hear from you,
Sincerely Tony

Good luck and welcome.

Ignace said:

Good luck and welcome.

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Thanks ! Can anyone give some thoughts or even some answers to my questions if possible?

Would much appreciate it .

Tony

nexus9 said:

Thanks ! Can anyone give some thoughts or even some answers to my questions if possible?

Would much appreciate it .

Tony

Click to expand...

I can't help you with medication, I only tried the weak/natural stuff since I'm not able to get a prescription. You may think medication is a blessing and maybe it does something to your problem, something good. But you are going to get something back. Side effects, getting worse after stopping the meds, .. I don't think there is a perfect med/dose for these problems. Wait as long as possible for meds is my advice. When you're having a panick attack or feel very nervous run into a wall or slap yourself in the face. Tell yourself it's not helping by panicking. This is probably not helping, but it does help me. Always when I'm in a sh*tty situation and feel like I'm going to explode, I just think I should calm down all the time and watch your breathing. Don't force yourself, don't scream to yourself for stopping overreacting or so, that only makes it worse, I tried it before. Maybe give it a try ?

Hi Tony!

First of all, I'm not an expert and it would be good if you got expert advice on these things - are you seeing anyone yet? You mentioned a CBT program, do you just do that by yourself or in a self-help group or with professional/s?
If you haven't done CBT yet, have you read books or websites about it? Some things have been quite helpful to me.. Though I never had full-blown panic attacks, well it came close a few times, that ended when the stress ended though..

I would like to ask the following: exactly what vitamins/minerals are you taking and what is your nutrition like?
I thought I ate 'healthy' too and actually lacked a whole lotta minerals and vitamins.. You can track your nutrition (together with supplements) at least for a few days on Fitday.com (for free) or free program called Cronometer.
It's also good to get tested for levels of important minerals/vitamins.
Some multivitamins can actually make things worse!!
For example if you don't get enough magnesium, and perhaps too much of other things that are magnesium antagonists.. Read ctds.info for more..

I also saw I'm better in the morning if I eat before sleeping.. If there's a long time when I don't eat, it gets worse..

As far as I know too much adrenaline rushes can exhaust your adrenals and you may wind up with something like 'adrenal fatigue' (although it seems a bit disputable condition, there is quite some info online about it) - getting tired a lot etc. I sometimes think I might have it too, as I've been under stress a lot the last few years too..

Personally, I try to stay away from meds and supplements too (I even had some bad side effects from some supplements, so just going it with nutrition, still tweaking it..)

Have you ever tried to get a panic attack on purpose? Some people say they can't get it then-?

100+degree in LA in a crowded street sounds sucky.. Have you tried doing 'slow exposures' like reading a magazine where there is hot weather/crowd on the photo, or reading car magazines..?
Have you tried tracking the thoughts in the car? Also, do you air it enough? (Some cars can have bad indoor pollution, environmental toxics - or sugar and coffee or alcohol - can again leach healthy minerals from your body, and air on highways can be bad too, probably best to air where the air outside is okay..)

Can you wake up earlier and eat something, so you'll be feeling better in the morning?

Also read this thread if you haven't yet: http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/shock-28481/ Some people here seem to have had success with CBT etc.

You can also write a 'worst case' scenario, that often helps me too: okay, so if you did 'lose your mind', what's the worst that can happen? (And then brainstorm what you could do to make it more survivable or even fun? and/or get out of that/avoid it.. For example, maybe you could meet a famous rock star or Hollywood star in the hospital, and they could fall in love with you and/or give you all their money? hmm.. When you can grin about it, it usually helps!)
Read The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr David Burns if you are not familiar with CBT yet, he mentions this technique too.

Feathers said:

Hi Tony!

First of all, I'm not an expert and it would be good if you got expert advice on these things - are you seeing anyone yet? You mentioned a CBT program, do you just do that by yourself or in a self-help group or with professional/s?
If you haven't done CBT yet, have you read books or websites about it? Some things have been quite helpful to me.. Though I never had full-blown panic attacks, well it came close a few times, that ended when the stress ended though..

I would like to ask the following: exactly what vitamins/minerals are you taking and what is your nutrition like?
I thought I ate 'healthy' too and actually lacked a whole lotta minerals and vitamins.. You can track your nutrition (together with supplements) at least for a few days on Fitday.com (for free) or free program called Cronometer.
It's also good to get tested for levels of important minerals/vitamins.
Some multivitamins can actually make things worse!!
For example if you don't get enough magnesium, and perhaps too much of other things that are magnesium antagonists.. Read ctds.info for more..

I also saw I'm better in the morning if I eat before sleeping.. If there's a long time when I don't eat, it gets worse..

As far as I know too much adrenaline rushes can exhaust your adrenals and you may wind up with something like 'adrenal fatigue' (although it seems a bit disputable condition, there is quite some info online about it) - getting tired a lot etc. I sometimes think I might have it too, as I've been under stress a lot the last few years too..

Personally, I try to stay away from meds and supplements too (I even had some bad side effects from some supplements, so just going it with nutrition, still tweaking it..)

Have you ever tried to get a panic attack on purpose? Some people say they can't get it then-?

100+degree in LA in a crowded street sounds sucky.. Have you tried doing 'slow exposures' like reading a magazine where there is hot weather/crowd on the photo, or reading car magazines..?
Have you tried tracking the thoughts in the car? Also, do you air it enough? (Some cars can have bad indoor pollution, environmental toxics - or sugar and coffee or alcohol - can again leach healthy minerals from your body, and air on highways can be bad too, probably best to air where the air outside is okay..)

Can you wake up earlier and eat something, so you'll be feeling better in the morning?

Also read this thread if you haven't yet: http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/shock-28481/ Some people here seem to have had success with CBT etc.

You can also write a 'worst case' scenario, that often helps me too: okay, so if you did 'lose your mind', what's the worst that can happen? (And then brainstorm what you could do to make it more survivable or even fun? and/or get out of that/avoid it.. For example, maybe you could meet a famous rock star or Hollywood star in the hospital, and they could fall in love with you and/or give you all their money? hmm.. When you can grin about it, it usually helps!)
Read The Feeling Good Handbook by Dr David Burns if you are not familiar with CBT yet, he mentions this technique too.

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Ahh Feathers , I love your soul Your rock star story was excellent and I knew it was going to work the second i finished reading it. Thank you so much. You know your name actually reminded me of another thinking technique where you imagine a feather tickling your amagadala (fear switch) and imagine it lowering the fear switch It has worked for me.

I am in a sleeping pattern right now where i sleep at 2 am till 5 am then awake till 1pm till about 5 pm and awake back again till 2am. Only reason I am at these sleeping patterns is #1 I work at home and its easy to get lazy #2 I stopped my exercise routine because Of a toe injury from tennis. But I am going back this week to exercising and when I get my slkeep right I would like to go to the CBT. Also I will read those books you mentioned, maybe if they have a online CBT video course I would love that.

I take nature made Multi for him and 2 a day omega-3 gel caps. I just purchased Amino acid L-Theanine 200mg extract of green leaf tea by suntheanine and took it a few times and actually I felt i could concentrate better and a little more relaxed . But in the mourning if i take it I feel a little tingly and that was when I really didnt understand yet what was going on with me so i got scared lol.

As far as minerals I put in my 16 ounce of water 5 times a day a pinch of sea salt brand called Real Salt from redmond , It contains 50+ minerals including 2% iodine. Thats about it . I am going to check out those sites you gave me.

I eat oatmeal , or cream of wheat and I feel good , but I get stick sometimes on bacon and hash browns then go right back to sleep lol.. At lunch I have a sandwhich or salad with chicken strips , I like lentil soup but lazy to prep it.
Dinner could be anything.

About the adrenaline rush. It is the panic attack , meaning the whole make up of my panic attack is the adrenaline and thats it. Thats why now when I start to have one it only last for 1 second of one wave of the adrenaline that i only feel in my head and now that I know its only that It goes away in 1 second or so. Thats why when you said have you tried to give yourself one and people expirience they can't , Your right I have tried that after knowing what is really happening and now i can't give myself one lol. Yes it does work your right.

Also I used to be the type of person that cared a little to much not way to much but a little to much on how people saw me . Also I would care a little to much if someone wasn't acting noble. I am in the process if reminding myself not to be that way and that seems to add to my peace.

Slow exposer, yes feathers this is the best of the best !! I go to the book store at victoria gardens and I absolutley love the book store but I can't drink any chi tea any more lol.. Oh well i allways loved water . But on cold rainy cozy night in the book store it sucks not to beable to drink some hot drinks . (if you know of any let me know). But seriuously I go out for the exposer and here's how it goes,
I leave the house feel a little anxious and then when I am about to get to the mall etc I start to feel the flight of fight response and I breath and tell myself all it is is the fight or flight response and it will go away after relaxing and if not you have the xanax in your pocket. Then it goes away and I pull up in the parking lot. Then the rest of the day I have no anxious feelings and i want to drive until my gas runs out lol. I mean I am the happiest broke person on the planet !! lol

I have some books thanks to you that I can read at the book store now. So excited , calm down tony lol.. Seriously I am going to look at all the sites (mineral nutrition sites) you gave me and read those books at the book store .
Hope to have you as a friend now Feather and if you ever want to chat by email i can post it to you . ok back to my poker tourney.
Sincerely Tony

Ignace said:

I can't help you with medication, I only tried the weak/natural stuff since I'm not able to get a prescription. You may think medication is a blessing and maybe it does something to your problem, something good. But you are going to get something back. Side effects, getting worse after stopping the meds, .. I don't think there is a perfect med/dose for these problems. Wait as long as possible for meds is my advice. When you're having a panick attack or feel very nervous run into a wall or slap yourself in the face. Tell yourself it's not helping by panicking. This is probably not helping, but it does help me. Always when I'm in a sh*tty situation and feel like I'm going to explode, I just think I should calm down all the time and watch your breathing. Don't force yourself, don't scream to yourself for stopping overreacting or so, that only makes it worse, I tried it before. Maybe give it a try ?

Click to expand...

Thanks for your info Ignace. Hope to read allot of good threads on here to when i have time.