Home is the only safe place for me, its getting this way

Hi
Im new today,Im a 32 yrs old male with a demanding job which is my dream job.
My life is in bits as I am haunted by this phobia of needing the loo.

It started when I was in situations where I felt trapped or cornered or crowded places. I got so anxious I needed to go for wee but when I got to the loo I didnt need to go.(or out of the situation).

Now I have it the other way round, not a wee anymore its the other, it started when going out for a meal or to a crowed place, it happens when I am waiting or in a queue, at work etc..

If I am in control, driving or in charge of what I am doing I am usually ok but it is in situations where I am not that it can happen. It is now a fear that stops me from going anywhere, if I know there is a toilet about I am usually ok however I dont want to be noticed going to the loo which makes it worse.

Help help help........the stress is to much....does anyone else have this type of fear or symptoms.

Medically I am fine and I am successful however this started 5 years ago and is now ruining my life.

Regards
Sparky

Nope I am serious, its a prob that is becomming a nightmare

I am outgoing and love having a laugh, the man of of the moment but now I dont go out, dont do anything without the fear of needing the loo.
It is made worse by crowds, eating in resturants etc..

Its horrible

Medical reasons have been eliminated, Im told by a councilor it is a fear and fight or flight condition

Anyone suffer this type of problem

sparky said:

Hi
Im new today,Im a 32 yrs old male with a demanding job which is my dream job.
My life is in bits as I am haunted by this phobia of needing the loo.

It started when I was in situations where I felt trapped or cornered or crowded places. I got so anxious I needed to go for wee but when I got to the loo I didnt need to go.(or out of the situation).

Now I have it the other way round, not a wee anymore its the other, it started when going out for a meal or to a crowed place, it happens when I am waiting or in a queue, at work etc..

If I am in control, driving or in charge of what I am doing I am usually ok but it is in situations where I am not that it can happen. It is now a fear that stops me from going anywhere, if I know there is a toilet about I am usually ok however I dont want to be noticed going to the loo which makes it worse.

Help help help........the stress is to much....does anyone else have this type of fear or symptoms.

Medically I am fine and I am successful however this started 5 years ago and is now ruining my life.

Regards
Sparky

Click to expand...

Your symptoms are exactly the same as mine.
This has been going on for me for over ten years.
I am also a 32 year old male,It has got to the point for me were im not working anymore (spending all my savings to survive)
If you want to know more email me.

Wow! My husband had the same when he was younger. It was all in his head but he's got OCD so it was CONSTANT for him. I don't really know the whole story as to how he got better from it (not the OCD, but that certain thing). I just thought I'd let you know you aren't alone.

Hi, I have the EXACT same feeling. I feel like I am about have diarrea when I am in situations outside of my control. My mother had the same symptoms and they were COMPLETELY removed with the use of Paxil. I started taking it about a week ago so I am waiting for it to kick in (it takes a few weeks)

Plz PM me anyone that knows more about this and can maybe relate and help me find ways to cope without meds. THX!

Oh my god,
I thought I was like the only person with this stupid ridiculous excuse of a phobia.
The anxiety all started at school during assemblies, but that was more a fear of being jammed in with so many people around me then it moved on to feeling that i was losing control during exams, classroom lessons. Now I live in London I get anxiety sometimes when using the tube because I know I'm jammed in and wont be able to go to the toilet. Sometimes I need to get off the tube because it becomes too much and I could never do a long coach or car journey because of it, I would be way too traumatised and worried about feeling the fear of needing to go to the toilet. On a bad day I also end up giving myself diarrhoea because i make myself so nervous about the anticipation of being stuck on the tube which only makes me panic even more, that im gonna need the toilet, but cutting out coffee and bread in the mornings has helped me a bit + rescue remedy is kinda good for calming yourself down during a panicky situation. Ive often tried to think deeply about what would be so bad if it did ever happen on a tube or public place then I realise its a fear of humiliating myself in front of other people and have them laugh at me- i dont know where this comes from, its an annoying bloody phobia and hard to talk about because to other people it must sound so stupid and pointless.

This used to be a lot worse when I was a kid, so at least there's improvement, but for me it's kind of a compulsion...I of course have OCD. I don't know what it is about going to the bathroom, but I ALWAYS go, even if I don't need to, if I'm about to leave somewhere. It used to be so bad that I would use the bathroom 6 times (always an even #) before bed and if I didnt do it right and get back to bed before the toilet was done flushing, then something (I don't know what) bad would happen...
Road trips are usually awful for me because my dad is the type who does not pull over to stop.... I think that's where it started, being stuck in the car with no escape. It became a panic thing and to avoid the panic I would go to great lengths making sure there was a bathroom nearby, not drinking water, always "emptying" myself before doing something....
I don't know if this is the same as what you guys are talking about, but it's how I relate...I never really talked about it before because it's pretty strange and embarrassing.

hiya sparky..this is not exactly the same...but similar..i always make sure i use the bathroom before i go anywhere..like 3 or 4 times ..cause i really hate to go anywhere else..and i have to scope out where the bathroom is FIRST when i get somewhere..just so i know where it is..just in case :!: ..but i never go alone..cause i'm afraid i might not be able to find who i am out with..when i'm done...and look like a dork..searching everywhere :roll: ...thank God i'm a girl..and we have all separate stalls in a public bathroom.. and i don't have to pee where others can see in urinal like you guys do...i give you credit for that...not sure i could do it :wink:

I have been suffering from bath problems for a few years. I was on Paxil but it put 15 pounds on me. Did not like that. I went off in in February and had my first little act in NYC the place where there is no bathrooms. I am going to start talking to someone. I hope that works. I take anti dirrheal meds. It does make me feel better. I just wish it will go away. It is making my life bad. I can not go anywhere.

WOW- This is crazy, I cannot believe others have this same phobia! I am 30, and I think my fear began when i was in my early 20's, when i felt sick and was trapped in a car on the tollway. so now i WILL not go anywhere if there is not a bathroom near. Driving has become my main issue- i am ok if i am alone in my car, but of others are with me, then i start to freak out- what if i have to go to the bathroom, but there are none around!? i mean really, what are the options? go in my pants and be mortified??? i will not ride in anyone's car - except for my family, then i am usually ok. this is just so crazy and i am tired of dealing with it. no one can figure out this intense fear, so i feel like a freak....i am so tired of having to make up crazy excuses to get out of situations. First it was just cars, then i got trapped in an elevator for almost 2 hours, so now i am afraid of ANYWHERE that does not have a bathroom. It sucks! I am so thrilled you guys can relate, though i am sorry you have to deal with it too! Maybe we can all help eachother~!

Hi I'm a 25 yr old girl who lives in Australia. I have the same problem that all you guys have been talking about.
I used to have it, along with anxiety and panic attacks, then i got over it, but now it has come back. It is awful. I have to get the train everyday and every day to city and back again i have to try so hard to relax. i'm ok if the train is moving, but then as soon as it stops (like between stations) i get this cold wave of panic and feel like i'm going to wee myself in front of everyone on the train. Then when i go out to lunch with a friend i always have to know where the nearest toilets are and if i realise there aren't any around i panice and feel like i'm going to wet myself. It's starting to happen everywhere. Like when i'm trying on clothes, or driving in a car. Like some of you mentioned, when i'm in control i'm fine, when i'm around my family and boyfriend i'm fine (i'm very lucky, my boyfriend is aware and very supportive) but anyone/anywhere else i lose it.
I hate the feeling i get. It's the worse feeling in the world and the panic is incredible. i just think god what would happen if i wet myself in public. I just want to not have to worry about something like this! everyone else in the world can do the simplest of things without worrying if they are going to need to go to the toilet.. why can't i? My message probably doesn't make sense, typing furiously trying to get it all out of my head onto the screen! if anyone has any solutions pls let me know!

I dont leave my house cause mine is so bad. Im only 21 and that kind of hinders my social life. but I cant. I freak. I only leave sometimes to go to the stores and things but i cant even do that right now cause the crouds are so bad for holidays. it freaks me out.

I have this problem too and have never heard of anyone else who suffers like I do until now.

It hinders every aspect of my life and I constantly worry what people think about me going to the loo all the time.

When I'm at home and know I can go whenever I want i don't need to go, but as soon as a situation occurs where I know I might have to wait a while all I can think about is needing the loo. It's ridiculous because I know its all in my head but it doesn't stop it from feeling real, the mind can be very powerful. Often I will feel like i'm am absolutely busting, get to the loo and then not even need it, its so fustrating!

I avoid so many situations now because I find it so traumatic, I don't go to the cinema, theatre, on long drives etc. I am a member of an orchestra and often skip rehersals because they last and hour and a half and I'm scared that I will need the loo. Its now affecting my work in a supermarket. I sometimes work on the checkout and as soon as I sit down I start thinking about how trapped I am and that I can't leave to go to the loo, then within 5 mins I feel like i'm bursting. It's so embarassing, my boss probably thinks i'm crazy.

I feel like i'm trapped in a loop at the moment and I can't see a way out and it keeps getting worse. If anyone knows anything that may help please share with me! I feel like I need my brain re programmed or something!

It's a horrible problem that I can't share with people because not only does it sound ridiculous its also very embarssing!

Hello, Sparky!!, yes, it happes exactly the same to me.
Even when a intend to make an excursion or if i am travelling, my stomach begins to ache me and i need to go to the loo, i think all that happens because it is not one' s home and the very thought of having to
go to the loo in a differente place or in a place where you are not feeling comfortable could be one of the reasons.
But i am totally certain that those symthoms you are talking about are psychological, not physical. You (or me), are not willing to go to the loo, but the fear of having to go to the loo in public or in some situations, makes you feel that.
That' s what i think.
See you- :wink:

I still occasionally feel like this. I used to get it really bad in the past. I'd hate having to answer the door to someone. I'd have all kinds of thoughts about who they were and how they perceived me.

I'd act as though there was no one in and then I'd go upstairs and look out of the window onto the front. It was almost always either door to door salesmen or people with clipboards doing surveys!! :lol:

There was a time, eight years ago, when I was so in need of company that I briefly went through a phase of opening the door!! :lol: I'd still much rather be at home than outside. It's horrible though when you feel a prisoner in your own home.

This thread means alot to me. I have this feeling too. Only not going for a wee.

I am 15 years old nearly 16. Ive had this feeling for about 4 weeks, ever since the start of my gcse mock exams.

I need help any advice?

I'm soooo glad ive found a place where i can discuss things like this with people.


I suffer from this " Toilet Phobia " , everywhere i go i get nervous and i will sort of hunt for where a toilet is with my mind just incase my stomach turns over and i need to rush to the loo.


It first started when i rushed down some breakfast , which consisted of crumpets covered in cheese.

2 mins after eating me , my sister, and my cousin were going to go shopping with my gran.

On the way there my stomach felt uneasy and when we were stuck in some traffic i started panicing and rather embarasingly asked my nan " To find a loo quick " when i got the the toilet in the shopping centre i remember feeling not too ill, but the panic was still stuck inside me and i spent four hours in that horrible shopping place.

I couldn't go home because my nan was in the town for a meeting on business, but when i got home i felt absolutely fine.


Its hard to explain it all without being 16 pages long, but life for me right now is all about whether i'm going to need the toilet or not,

Ive lost friends because i won't go " Clubbing " etc with them because i know that as soon as i get near the place i will need the toilet,

Exams were hell for me aswell, i took Kaolin and Morphine before exams to stop me from needing the toilet, and i would not eat or drink on the mornings before exams.

Rescue Remedy helped me through the exams a few times

Ive recently realised that i might have irritible bowel syndrome, and by eating the correct foods my stomach feels alot better right now.

I'm going to book an appointment with the doctor this week to see what he suggests to me, to take away the panic attacks and major anxiety i get...

This all started for me when i was 14 or 15 and i'm now 19 and working, its realy realy hard for me because sometimes i have to go on a course to do with the work i do, and sometimes i have to drive a van somewhere.

This always makes me feel realy uneasy and sometimes i nearly have panic attacks, lately i'm considering quiting my job just because i want to sort out my phobia and stomach problems.

This post makes no sense whatsoever, but i would love someone with a similar problem to email me so we can talk on msn.

Please reply to this... thanks in advance.

John.

I've been getting this since I was a child. All my friends take the mick out of me for needing the toilet all the time and panicking about it when ever we're in situations where I cant go. I never knew why I had it. i thought it was because I had diabetes, so I got checked out and it wasnt

now that I'm reading other people have this on this board and its all making sense to me now.

Other things have happened to me recently and I looked on the internet, and now I'm starting to realize I may have Agoraphobia, and have had it for the majority of my life.

I have such a bad phobia of needing the loo and it's a really restrictive fear to have. I'm 17 and I think this fear started when I was in year 9 because we'd driven all the way to Newcastle and I was busting for the loo but we were told there were no loos on that side of the airport...I was really desperate and there was a big queue to the desk. I had like a panic attack and they let me use the staff loos I think in the end...but ever since then I'm really scared of needing the loo. I went to a christian concert earlier in the year and I was stood in a crowd and I had to check where the loos were and make sure I could get out of the crowd to the loos if I wanted. It's getting worse because i actually choose not to do stuff in case I might need the loo...like i went to this activity place on sunday and there were high ropes but i didn't go on in case i went up there and needed the loo. It's such a horrible fear to have...how can you get over it?