How are you feeling?

Srijita52 · Sep 9, 2012

KiaKaha said:
I am starting my new job on Tuesday.

If you are interested I am now working in a cash and currency security firm. Driving to and picking up cash from banks and refilling automatic teller machines - along with general admin type work.

I quit my job at the postal service. Interesting - the entire time I was there, no one said a word to me.... not even a hello or good morning. The moment they new I was leaving they all started warming up to me and chatting to me.

Like saying how wonderful someone is at their funeral - when you hated their guts when they were alive.

Lame. People are lame.

Good luck with the new job Kia. I hope it goes much better.

MikeyC said:
I feel better now. I went to see my grandmother and going to the dementia ward freaks me out really bad - a fact I let my parents know. They think it's silly, but whatever. Luckily, I got to sit outside and not have to set a foot inside that building. My grandmother was happy to see me and we stayed for about an hour. I feel good that I finally got the courage to go.

I'm so glad you made her happy Mikey even though it was scary.

MikeyC · Sep 9, 2012

Srijita52 said:
I'm so glad you made her happy Mikey even though it was scary.

Thank you.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure she was happy to see me. I dislike seeing her in that state, though: shoved in a home and can't do much. There's absolutely nothing I can do to reverse it. One of the pitfalls of old age.

Srijita52 · Sep 9, 2012

Good, went to a party today and had somewhat of a good time although I kept feeling like no one cared that I was there which is true to an extent. But anyway, guess I can just keep trying.

MikeyC said:
Thank you. Yeah, I'm pretty sure she was happy to see me. I dislike seeing her in that state, though: shoved in a home and can't do much. There's absolutely nothing I can do to reverse it. One of the pitfalls of old age.

Yeah, it really sucks. I'm sorry, I guess the only relief she can get in this situation is that her family's still there for her.

coyote · Sep 9, 2012

i seriously need a cup of coffee

Bustn Justin · Sep 9, 2012

coyote said:
i seriously need a cup of coffee

I am getting one too.

Seriously been feeling real depressed and beat myself up lately. As well feelings of suicide.

I have plenty of guilt sharing my feelings with everyone since they have problems of their own.

JuiceB · Sep 9, 2012

MikeyC said:
I feel better now. I went to see my grandmother and going to the dementia ward freaks me out really bad - a fact I let my parents know. They think it's silly, but whatever. Luckily, I got to sit outside and not have to set a foot inside that building. My grandmother was happy to see me and we stayed for about an hour. I feel good that I finally got the courage to go.

Hey man I'm glad you decided to go see her. Wish I was able to see mine but that time has passed.

Graeme1988 · Sep 9, 2012

Didnae get much sleep last night (Ain't insomnia a f**kin' joy, eh? F**kin' pain in the arse more like)

So, I'm pretty much bored s**tless today. Don't feel like doing anything.

Feelin' a wee bit depressed as well...

Phoenixx · Sep 9, 2012

Sleepy and lazy. All I want to do is sit around and watch The Hunger Games. Either that or Project Runway. I don't want to do any research for this Anthropology paper, I don't want to read any more history, and I certainly don't want to study.

But I have to. *le sigh*

Phoenixx · Sep 9, 2012

Srijita52 said:
Good, went to a party today and had somewhat of a good time although I kept feeling like no one cared that I was there which is true to an extent. But anyway, guess I can just keep trying.

^ That's good.

Yes, keep on trying!

MikeyC · Sep 9, 2012

Srijita52 said:
Good, went to a party today and had somewhat of a good time although I kept feeling like no one cared that I was there which is true to an extent. But anyway, guess I can just keep trying.

Good on you for going! What made you think nobody wanted you there? Either way, you did well by breaking out and attending, and hopefully you can attend some more in the near future.

dottie · Sep 9, 2012

trying to focus on projects to keep my mind occupied. the edge of the broken heart has subsided some but a dull ache is still present. i wonder how he's doing. he was in the hospital for mental issues last year... is he as hunky-dory as he let on in his last message weeks ago? does he care? did he really love me? was i just a place keeper? i did love him. if i was duped i will never know but he has made irreparable choices.

but my feelings for my cat have not changed and i want custody. i'm too afraid to contact him to try to get my cat. our cat, whatever. we got him together... i know he will raise hell and not let me have him. i don't know if my heart can endure more turmoil.

i do care about him but he is like half-monster and i don't understand what is going on with him. probably due to mental illness that he neglects. he doesn't seem honest with himself... if you're not honest with yourself how can you be honest with other people? we all have our flaws, though, including me... i'm neurotic and insecure... at what point do you draw a line with someone? i don't know. i don't know.

KiaKaha · Sep 9, 2012

Meh.
I should probably learn to shut up. I have too many questions though.
I have a ton of thread ideas - but I get paranoid about posting them in case I am bugging the forum etc.

Maybe I should just go offline for a bit.

MikeyC · Sep 9, 2012

dottie said:
trying to focus on projects to keep my mind occupied. the edge of the broken heart has subsided some but a dull ache is still present. i wonder how he's doing. he was in the hospital for mental issues last year... is he as hunky-dory as he let on in his last message weeks ago? does he care? did he really love me? was i just a place keeper? i did love him. if i was duped i will never know but he has made irreparable choices.

but my feelings for my cat have not changed and i want custody. i'm too afraid to contact him to try to get my cat. our cat, whatever. we got him together... i know he will raise hell and not let me have him. i don't know if my heart can endure more turmoil.

i do care about him but he is like half-monster and i don't understand what is going on with him. probably due to mental illness that he neglects. he doesn't seem honest with himself... if you're not honest with yourself how can you be honest with other people? we all have our flaws, though, including me... i'm neurotic and insecure... at what point do you draw a line with someone? i don't know. i don't know.

People can change and turn on you the millisecond you're no longer together, which is always surprising. You're not the first or the last to experience this.

I hope you get your cat back.

KiaKaha said:
Meh.
I should probably learn to shut up. I have too many questions though.
I have a ton of thread ideas - but I get paranoid about posting them in case I am bugging the forum etc.

Maybe I should just go offline for a bit.

If you have lots of thread ideas, post away. I like hearing your points of view.

Nathália · Sep 9, 2012

KiaKaha said:
Meh.
I should probably learn to shut up. I have too many questions though.
I have a ton of thread ideas - but I get paranoid about posting them in case I am bugging the forum etc.

Maybe I should just go offline for a bit.

No, you make things interesting.

dottie said:
trying to focus on projects to keep my mind occupied. the edge of the broken heart has subsided some but a dull ache is still present. i wonder how he's doing. he was in the hospital for mental issues last year... is he as hunky-dory as he let on in his last message weeks ago? does he care? did he really love me? was i just a place keeper? i did love him. if i was duped i will never know but he has made irreparable choices.

but my feelings for my cat have not changed and i want custody. i'm too afraid to contact him to try to get my cat. our cat, whatever. we got him together... i know he will raise hell and not let me have him. i don't know if my heart can endure more turmoil.

i do care about him but he is like half-monster and i don't understand what is going on with him. probably due to mental illness that he neglects. he doesn't seem honest with himself... if you're not honest with yourself how can you be honest with other people? we all have our flaws, though, including me... i'm neurotic and insecure... at what point do you draw a line with someone? i don't know. i don't know.

So srry dottie that he's acting lame and you have to go through that.

dottie · Sep 9, 2012

thanks, guys. i feel lame for being so hung up... but we were together for a few years. bleh. getoverit.

Invisibleman · Sep 10, 2012

Its one of my favourite things falling asleep to the sound of rain.

MikeyC · Sep 10, 2012

dottie said:
thanks, guys. i feel lame for being so hung up... but we were together for a few years. bleh. getoverit.

You can't just forget someone who you were with for years, and even later in life, you will always have a history with this man, whether or not you hate him now.

You only broke up a few days ago, right? Well, give yourself time to heal! No need to "getoverit" so quickly after such a long time together. Allow yourself to grieve, heal, accept, and go through all that.

MikeyC · Sep 10, 2012

I feel good still, but I'm noticing an approaching storm in my mind. This is almost certainly a lack of sleep. Perhaps an early bed time is in need tonight.

I go to see my therapist tomorrow. I have much to discuss.

vermont · Sep 10, 2012

im happy and relieved!
lately my cat had some health issues that worried me very very very much.

very!
(she's extremely precious to me )

today we took her to the vet and got the all clear.

im happy!

MikeyC · Sep 10, 2012

vermont said:
im happy and relieved!
lately my cat had some health issues that worried me very very very much.

very!
(she's extremely precious to me )

today we took her to the vet and got the all clear.

im happy!

Healthy cat = happy owner.

What were the health issues?

How are you feeling?

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