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Old 11-27-2011  
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Default How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

I work in sales and there is this Regional manager that is spreading rumors about me. I confronted him 2-3 months ago he keeps doing it. What annoys me is that people start to believe him now...... I only see him once or twice a month. In my fantasy I would knock him out cold but I reality I don't know who to do anymore? This passive aggressive **** keeps " jabbing " me when he sees the opportunity. Should I call him up and call him out AGAIN?
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

what exactly is he saying about you...could you choose to continue working without caring what he is saying?
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

If he's spreading rumors about more people- the victims; including you, could launch a formal complaint together.
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

I want to settle this " internally" meaning no HR department or superior. I just don't want to lash out out the guy and look like the crazy one...

Last edited by deleted #89; 11-28-2011 at 05:28 AM..
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

I agree with WeirdyMcGee, it's so much simplier to go and talk to a superior about it and be down right honest tell them you have already had a word with them and now it's time to take it to the next level.
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

I think most supervisors prefer that you attempt to settle things on your own. If that doesn't work, then talk to your boss/HR.

I think for his behavior to be considered harassment you have to first tell him you don't like his behavior and tell him to stop. If he persists, then it is officially harassment and it's time to go to HR.

Sorry you have to deal with this, being bullied at work is an awful experience. When it was happening to me, I was completely stressed, couldn't sleep, constantly on edge for months.

Our life is what our thoughts make it - Marcus Aurelius
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

If you can prove he is slandering you, you can contact your OHS rep.(Occupational Health and Safety).
Need to document any case of harassment...the details of conversations and witnesses.

If it's not too bad just ignore it. Sometimes we just have to put up with gossip in the work-place. Eventually people will see thru any innacurate gossip and the gossiper will be shown up as the "problem child".
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

I wouldn't directly confront him because that doesn't seem to work with him. I would record everything--dates, times, incidents--anything that he has done, and when you are ready take the report to HR. Just remember to record everything and when you are ready make the formal complaint.

You shouldn't have to deal with a bully at work, especially a superior. I had an experience with an abusive supervisor--she was a combination of passive aggressive and downright in my face mean. I know how much it can hurt to have to work with someone like that. In the end, just realize that it's not you--it's him. He's the one who's so unhappy with his life that he wants to spread his misery to anyone he has the tiniest bit of power over. Someone like that should be fired.
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Old 11-28-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MR.Wonderful View Post
I want to settle this " internally" meaning no HR department or superior. I just don't want to lash out out the guy and look like the crazy one...
Over time his meanness might make you get frustrated and lash out at him directly, which would only make things worse. Chances are your work performance is already decreasing.

Even though you don't want to, I'd just think about making a complaint, if you don't feel comfortable with your HR department than to the department of labor for harassment. And yes, it's harassment.

Last edited by Etbow23; 11-28-2011 at 03:43 PM..
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Old 12-02-2011  
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Default Re: How can I deal with this " bully" at work?

About a year ago, I did some intensive research on bullies and I'll share what worked for me.

Bullies are terrified of crazy people and most people that are targeted by bullies are terrified of people thinking they are crazy... Boy did I relate to that!

Bullies are relentless because they feed off of the pain they inflict and will never stop once they have found a target unless forced to.

Here's what I did and it worked like a charm... I took the bully aside (I practiced first and got feed back from hubby) where no one could see and hear and offered my tormentor my most prized possession with a wild eyed crazy expression on my face... A big fat juicy bugger - not to be confused with "burger " while I had a finger digging around in my nose.
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