Starry
Well-known member
So, I've had more than one request to post the story of meeting my husband on this site. I did post it, maybe a year or two ago, but as it was within a thread it seemed to get a little lost... So here it is again... This will be long!!
I registered here in December 2006, 22 days later, on 2nd January 2007, a man on this site started speaking to me on the mini-chat feature. As I learned later, he'd read some of my posts and instantly been drawn to me. I still remember his first words to me, they were: "Hello!
So, you were 21 two days ago?" Once talking, the feeling was mutual, and I quickly developed a crush on him... After just 6 days of talking with him on the chat feature I was already feeling incredibly ill with anxiety because of my feelings for him, plus the social phobia on top of it. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep... When I did sleep I had nightmares of him being with me then vanishing, leaving me all alone, and I'd wake up calling his name. The anxiety was shocking, I'd never felt so anxious before about anything. But I persisted and we spoke every day for hours on end.
Six weeks into knowing him he sent me a message just as we were saying goodnight... It said "Amo te"... I felt very ill, yet happy, when I realised what it meant... But I didn't dare to bring the subject up the next day when we spoke. He waited a day or two before asking if I got his message... I said that I did, but questioned whether he meant it in terms of friendship or something more... It was, of course, the latter, and I had to admit I felt the same...
We started speaking on MSN and, eventually, I didn't bother with this site anymore. During our time talking he rescued me from the Jehovah's Witnesses - I'd always had terrible issues with the Bible and the cruelty and evil I perceive in it, but I wasn't strong enough to break free on my own... He helped me, he got me to question things in such a way that I could no longer accept it. I knew it was wrong... All of this made me very ill, and I suffered a lot during that time, but I am so much happier now!
After 18 months of chatting online, he decided it was time to meet me in person... Now, any normal person would have caught a train to come to my city to meet me (He lived in Hereford and I was in Birmingham), but not him... Too anxious to use public transport, he decided to walk - yes - WALK! the distance to meet me... He also didn't tell me that he was coming, though we'd discussed it, and he had permission to come, though he did hint at it... Strongly enough, that I knew he was on his way... He did so without a map (he merely wrote down a few instructions on a scrap of paper). He of course had to sleep out overnight, since the journey was too long for one day... He slept in a field, with nothing but a jumper, his rucksack and a torch... No sleeping bag!
The next day, Friday 13th June, I was opening the door to take my dog for our short "Beat the agoraphobia" walk up the road and back... I did so just as he was about to knock it. Of course I jumped terribly, the dog barked ferociously at him (and kept doing so every time he moved for a day or two afterwards).. All I could mumble was "Okay then..."
He stood there with bits of grass in his hair, looking exhausted... I was terrified! We went into the back garden, where he sat on a slightly rotten garden chair, which, typically, decided to break at that very moment. It was hard not to laugh at the site of him fallen through the seat of the chair. He sat on the ground after that.
My old dog liked him straight away, but my younger dog just would not trust him, not after he made me jump so violently. (She loves him now, however. ^_^) My old dog delighted in licking his feet, which after wearing hiking boots for one and a half days solid, were not at all pleasant to smell!
We eventually went into the house, and within an hour or two he told me, for the first time in person, "rest assured, I do still love you!" I had so much fear about meeting him in person due to the fact I thought he wouldn't love me anymore... But he still did, which made my heart skip a beat!
Next thing to worry about was telling my mother that he had come... I was so embarrassed... But we managed it together.
That evening we listened to some music together and he held my hand, then cuddled me for the first time. It felt so amazing! The feeling is indescribable! When I left him to sleep I was trembling so much!
It took a week or so for my anxiety of being around him to wear off so that I was completely comfortable around him. Over the weeks he was with me, we conquered my agoraphobia and I delighted in going on long walks and picnics with him. My mother didn't make things easy... She took a dislike to him, presumably because he was "stealing her daughter from her"... She caused many arguments and made times unhappy... After 8 weeks, we caught the train to Hereford, so we could stay at his home for a while. During this time things became incredibly unhappy, his mother was worse than mine in terms of causing arguments, I hated it there, but I couldn't bare to be parted from him. Although, during this time one very happy thing occurred: On Friday, 13th of September, he proposed to me! I was so happy, I cried!
After 10 weeks in Hereford, we returned to Birmingham. After a month there he returned to Hereford on his own for a while (He planned to be gone two months, until after Christmas)... I couldn't cope without him. I couldn't eat, and spent all my time in bed, trying not to cry... I was terribly obsessed! So after two weeks he returned to me. After that we never parted again, we traveled back and forth between Birmingham and Hereford, always spending more time in Birmingham since I found it so difficult to cope with his mother.
During this time we were trying to get a home of our own.. We'd all but given up hope of ever getting a place, since it was so difficult. But finally on 17th January 2011 we found a place to live! In a village in Herefordshire. We moved in in February, and finally we were married on 8th December 2011. We had a very small wedding, with just close family, in a local church (despite not being Christian - but rather Deist - we couldn't face going to the city to use the Town Hall). We had a beautiful horse and carriage too, which was a dream come true.
And so ends the story, we've been happily married since then. I love him with all my heart and he loves me equally so, if not more!
In October/November of 2006 I'd been praying for "Truth and Love" - truth about the Jehovah's Witnesses and love because I was so lonely... Along came "Veritas" - his username, Latin for "Truth"... He did bring me the truth about the JWs and he definitely brought me love... My prayer was completely answered... So I have definite faith in the power of prayer...
And all of this goes to show, that no matter what struggles you have to go through, no matter how hopeless you feel, or how hard life is, there is always hope! So never, ever give up!
I registered here in December 2006, 22 days later, on 2nd January 2007, a man on this site started speaking to me on the mini-chat feature. As I learned later, he'd read some of my posts and instantly been drawn to me. I still remember his first words to me, they were: "Hello!
So, you were 21 two days ago?" Once talking, the feeling was mutual, and I quickly developed a crush on him... After just 6 days of talking with him on the chat feature I was already feeling incredibly ill with anxiety because of my feelings for him, plus the social phobia on top of it. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep... When I did sleep I had nightmares of him being with me then vanishing, leaving me all alone, and I'd wake up calling his name. The anxiety was shocking, I'd never felt so anxious before about anything. But I persisted and we spoke every day for hours on end.Six weeks into knowing him he sent me a message just as we were saying goodnight... It said "Amo te"... I felt very ill, yet happy, when I realised what it meant... But I didn't dare to bring the subject up the next day when we spoke. He waited a day or two before asking if I got his message... I said that I did, but questioned whether he meant it in terms of friendship or something more... It was, of course, the latter, and I had to admit I felt the same...
We started speaking on MSN and, eventually, I didn't bother with this site anymore. During our time talking he rescued me from the Jehovah's Witnesses - I'd always had terrible issues with the Bible and the cruelty and evil I perceive in it, but I wasn't strong enough to break free on my own... He helped me, he got me to question things in such a way that I could no longer accept it. I knew it was wrong... All of this made me very ill, and I suffered a lot during that time, but I am so much happier now!
After 18 months of chatting online, he decided it was time to meet me in person... Now, any normal person would have caught a train to come to my city to meet me (He lived in Hereford and I was in Birmingham), but not him... Too anxious to use public transport, he decided to walk - yes - WALK! the distance to meet me... He also didn't tell me that he was coming, though we'd discussed it, and he had permission to come, though he did hint at it... Strongly enough, that I knew he was on his way... He did so without a map (he merely wrote down a few instructions on a scrap of paper). He of course had to sleep out overnight, since the journey was too long for one day... He slept in a field, with nothing but a jumper, his rucksack and a torch... No sleeping bag!
The next day, Friday 13th June, I was opening the door to take my dog for our short "Beat the agoraphobia" walk up the road and back... I did so just as he was about to knock it. Of course I jumped terribly, the dog barked ferociously at him (and kept doing so every time he moved for a day or two afterwards).. All I could mumble was "Okay then..."
He stood there with bits of grass in his hair, looking exhausted... I was terrified! We went into the back garden, where he sat on a slightly rotten garden chair, which, typically, decided to break at that very moment. It was hard not to laugh at the site of him fallen through the seat of the chair. He sat on the ground after that.
My old dog liked him straight away, but my younger dog just would not trust him, not after he made me jump so violently. (She loves him now, however. ^_^) My old dog delighted in licking his feet, which after wearing hiking boots for one and a half days solid, were not at all pleasant to smell!
We eventually went into the house, and within an hour or two he told me, for the first time in person, "rest assured, I do still love you!" I had so much fear about meeting him in person due to the fact I thought he wouldn't love me anymore... But he still did, which made my heart skip a beat!
Next thing to worry about was telling my mother that he had come... I was so embarrassed... But we managed it together.
That evening we listened to some music together and he held my hand, then cuddled me for the first time. It felt so amazing! The feeling is indescribable! When I left him to sleep I was trembling so much!
It took a week or so for my anxiety of being around him to wear off so that I was completely comfortable around him. Over the weeks he was with me, we conquered my agoraphobia and I delighted in going on long walks and picnics with him. My mother didn't make things easy... She took a dislike to him, presumably because he was "stealing her daughter from her"... She caused many arguments and made times unhappy... After 8 weeks, we caught the train to Hereford, so we could stay at his home for a while. During this time things became incredibly unhappy, his mother was worse than mine in terms of causing arguments, I hated it there, but I couldn't bare to be parted from him. Although, during this time one very happy thing occurred: On Friday, 13th of September, he proposed to me! I was so happy, I cried!
After 10 weeks in Hereford, we returned to Birmingham. After a month there he returned to Hereford on his own for a while (He planned to be gone two months, until after Christmas)... I couldn't cope without him. I couldn't eat, and spent all my time in bed, trying not to cry... I was terribly obsessed! So after two weeks he returned to me. After that we never parted again, we traveled back and forth between Birmingham and Hereford, always spending more time in Birmingham since I found it so difficult to cope with his mother.
During this time we were trying to get a home of our own.. We'd all but given up hope of ever getting a place, since it was so difficult. But finally on 17th January 2011 we found a place to live! In a village in Herefordshire. We moved in in February, and finally we were married on 8th December 2011. We had a very small wedding, with just close family, in a local church (despite not being Christian - but rather Deist - we couldn't face going to the city to use the Town Hall). We had a beautiful horse and carriage too, which was a dream come true.
And so ends the story, we've been happily married since then. I love him with all my heart and he loves me equally so, if not more!
In October/November of 2006 I'd been praying for "Truth and Love" - truth about the Jehovah's Witnesses and love because I was so lonely... Along came "Veritas" - his username, Latin for "Truth"... He did bring me the truth about the JWs and he definitely brought me love... My prayer was completely answered... So I have definite faith in the power of prayer...
And all of this goes to show, that no matter what struggles you have to go through, no matter how hopeless you feel, or how hard life is, there is always hope! So never, ever give up!
