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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default How to Deal with the Female Bully

Female aggression is a major problem that needs to be addressed. Unfortunately, many female bullies get away with their actions because they know how to be "sweet" around the right people.
The victims of female aggression are in desperate need of guidance and support, so they can gain the confidence they need to be successful.
For more information go to: The Female Bully.
Remember: The bully is not invincible.
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

I don't see the point in subcategorizing bullies as 'male' or 'female'. Inducing hate and prejudice against all women because of your own bad experiences with a certain percent of them is not a good thing too, in my opinion.
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Quote:
Originally Posted by drumev View Post
I don't see the point in subcategorizing bullies as 'male' or 'female'. Inducing hate and prejudice against all women because of your own bad experiences with a certain percent of them is not a good thing too, in my opinion.
I think in a way, it's necessary. Even though men and women are pretty much capable of doing the same, from birth both are treated differently by society. It might cause them so grow up with slight difference in thought process. And so, there might be fluctuations between bully methods of the general male and general female that require different specified actions.

Though, with that said, I agree with you. :3 I'd rather see a site that is dedicated to bullying in general, instead of to just one of the sexes. Not to mention that the site concentrates mostly on one specific female stereotype, and even though I don't rule out that those kind of people exist, it's not very efficient to specify on just this stereotype.

It's better to let the victims discuss it amongst themselves, and perhaps reel in a professional that can discuss with them as well if it's necessary. Bullying cases are really case-by-case situations. One (series of similar) method(s) isn't going to work for everyone.

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Last edited by BlackPuma; 09-01-2010 at 10:12 PM..
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Well, I do think it can be different if they are female or male, so maybe it's good to have a separate thread?

I haven't really experienced it first hand, but I heard girls can be sneakier and such, there can be quite different situations..

If we can have a ton of different threads for every shade of being shy, what's wrong with a thread just for this?
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Yes, I am well aware that both males and females are bullied for different reasons. And yes, I agree that bullies from both genders are equally dangerous.

However, male bullies are generally very open about their actions, and therefore get caught and stopped (most of the time). On the other hand, female bullies use subtle manipulation tactics to destroy their victim’s confidence. Meanwhile, they appear to be the leaders, and they are often favored by their teachers and other adults.
Believe me, this type of bullying is happening all the time. Just read Female Bullies in Public Schools: The Rising Trend and School Reactions - Public School Review, and How Girls Bully - The Different Ways That Girls Bully Peers

Sadly, many girls who are being bullied are too ashamed and/or afraid to stand up, or even tell anyone for that matter. Even when their parents confront another adult such as a teacher or a guidance counselor, the adult will often gloss over the issue because they are in denial. Frequently, they will say something along the lines of, “Well, so and so is a leader here,” (i.e. a peer helper). Furthermore, if the victim tries to speak out, people often make her feel like she is the one with THE PROBLEM. How would you feel if your daughter's confidence was destroyed by a ruthless group of girls, and she was afraid to tell anyone what happening to her? Don't you think this girl needs support?

A site that talks about bullies in general is not as effective as one that zooms in on a particular type of bully. Young girls facing female aggression need a website that is geared for them. This way, they will understand what they are TRULY going through, WHY this is happening to them, and HOW they can succeed. That's why this site was created.

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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

i just refer to them as "bitches", haha... apart from any "bullying" at all, females can be a lot 'deeper' individuals, especially when it comes to arguments in relationships and whatnot.. males handle things much more simply than we do, they easily take care of business while we make it some kind of secret effing conspiracy, lol.. i definitely admit to being a class A bitch when my intention is to 'hurt' someone, it goes a lot deeper than just 'on the surface' name calling...... however, my intentions are hardly ever to hurt anyone, so yeah..

"no longer forward nor behind
i look in hope and fear;
but grateful take the good i find,
the best of now and here."
-john g whittier

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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Thankyou Kath for bringing up this topic.

It is necessary to subcatagorize bullying because the styles and tactics used are very different. Female bullying typically goes under the radar exactly because of the way it is carried out.

I have dealt with it first hand, and it is very destructive. Usually the bully is an alpha female who knows how to kiss up to teachers and parents. She is very social, athletic, gets good grades, is liked and admired by male and female peers. She is not the outcast. She is typically the athletic VIP or prom queen type.

This is a major problem. Girls develop eating disorders, cut themselves and attempt suicide over years of systematic, deliberate bullying by these girls. They have nobody to talk to, because parents and teachers are smitten by these female bullies.
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Bullying is rarely male v male, female v female it is often across genders.

At high school I was bullied by both boys and girls. I am male.

I found some of the bullying by girls to be the most hurtful of all. Most of it was verbal criticisms, laughter and ridicule. Very sould destryoing of my adolescent self esteem. Something I have never truly recovered from.

People are like birds they try to hide their pain

This morning I noticed a wildflower, and my thoughts were lost in its colour and form, and the darkness lifted.

And you finally found all your courage to let it all go.
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Old 09-01-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

the way my dad told me to deal with bullies is that you need to learn how to take a beating an he was right. I went to war with some bullies, got my *** kick a few times but kicked *** too. It's impossible to deal verbally with all of them so you got to do what you got to do to have peace. it doesn't matter if they are female or male
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Old 09-02-2010  
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Default Re: How to Deal with the Female Bully

Quote:
How to Deal with the Female Bully


I suppose a kick in the nuts is ruled out a priori?

"To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered." - Voltaire

"We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are." - Max De Pree

"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anais Nin
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