For me, it's equally as hard to talk to people and make friends or acquaintances online as it is in real life. I can imagine having conversations with people and doing well and enjoying it. But when it comes to actually doing it, I can't get myself to say much. I'm afraid to share my interests with other people because I'm so afraid of being laughed/judged. I know it's silly and I shouldn't be so scared of it, but I am.
All my life I've had some kind of fear that has prevented me from talking about certain things/in certain situations. When I was a little kid I used to have a very hard time asking my parents if I could do this or that. I was always worried they would say no or get mad, etc. They never did get mad and they almost always said yes if I asked (because I wasn't asking to do anything crazy/stupid/expensive/weird/etc).
When I got older this same fear/feeling and strange...like physical inability to talk attached itself to talking to other teenagers about...anything. I have improved a lot and this thing has lessened, but I still struggle with it some.
I think one of the biggest problems I've had is connecting with people and getting people to know me and like me. I worry so much about boring people or saying something awkward or stupid that I don't make enough small talk. And I can't seem to keep anyone interested and engaged for long.
I have had online friends/acquaintances before, and most of the time I had to be the one to message them first. And as I already said I could never think of enough things to talk about and keep them engaged and have them learn about me and become my friend, etc.
Sometimes I have periods where I do unusually well with people, but I never have someone that wants to come back and talk to me. It seems like everyone else does so well talking with people, and at least keep acquaintances, that they don't care to put any work in for me. I don't interest them enough. I'm not that boring, I just seem to be paralyzed with fear.
And the thing is, it's seems a lot of people to very well online even if they struggle greatly in real life. But me...I do just as horrible online as I do in real life. On another forum I visited there used to be group chat sessions (just text) every week on a certain day. I noticed that, when there were multiple people there, people would talk to me a little bit--comment on things I say, answer questions, etc. But most of the time, if I was the only person in chat (like if it was early and most of the other people weren't online yet), no one would come into chat and stay in chat and talk to me. It seems I just can't be engaging/interesting enough.
I just sometimes feel like I am doing something wrong. I just want to stop fear from controlling me and get some friends. Hang out with people. Have fun. I just really want friends. I've been feeling so lonely.
All my life I've had some kind of fear that has prevented me from talking about certain things/in certain situations. When I was a little kid I used to have a very hard time asking my parents if I could do this or that. I was always worried they would say no or get mad, etc. They never did get mad and they almost always said yes if I asked (because I wasn't asking to do anything crazy/stupid/expensive/weird/etc).
When I got older this same fear/feeling and strange...like physical inability to talk attached itself to talking to other teenagers about...anything. I have improved a lot and this thing has lessened, but I still struggle with it some.
I think one of the biggest problems I've had is connecting with people and getting people to know me and like me. I worry so much about boring people or saying something awkward or stupid that I don't make enough small talk. And I can't seem to keep anyone interested and engaged for long.
I have had online friends/acquaintances before, and most of the time I had to be the one to message them first. And as I already said I could never think of enough things to talk about and keep them engaged and have them learn about me and become my friend, etc.
Sometimes I have periods where I do unusually well with people, but I never have someone that wants to come back and talk to me. It seems like everyone else does so well talking with people, and at least keep acquaintances, that they don't care to put any work in for me. I don't interest them enough. I'm not that boring, I just seem to be paralyzed with fear.
And the thing is, it's seems a lot of people to very well online even if they struggle greatly in real life. But me...I do just as horrible online as I do in real life. On another forum I visited there used to be group chat sessions (just text) every week on a certain day. I noticed that, when there were multiple people there, people would talk to me a little bit--comment on things I say, answer questions, etc. But most of the time, if I was the only person in chat (like if it was early and most of the other people weren't online yet), no one would come into chat and stay in chat and talk to me. It seems I just can't be engaging/interesting enough.
I just sometimes feel like I am doing something wrong. I just want to stop fear from controlling me and get some friends. Hang out with people. Have fun. I just really want friends. I've been feeling so lonely.