I have some sort of split personality...

PennyLane

Well-known member
Hey everyone...this started out as an answer to the thread about hiding but then I realised I would be so grateful for peoples opinions on why I am like this..

Basically i was going to write on that thread that yes I do hide and sometimes to a very extreme level even with people I know. Like others i hide in my room from my flatmates or avoid people on the street etc...and things like presentations and stuff are pure helll (thats not really hiding but just an idea of me)

So heres the bit I dont understand about myself. On a lot of other days Im really friendly, chatty and purposefully sit in the lounge when my flatties are there. I love family parties, i do have friends (not loads i admit) and i can generally make polite conversation with a stranger for a few minutes. People I know...actually can't shut me up sometimes..

Maybe I look like a phony now...but its those other days, which happen a few times a week (at least) where i am terrified of people (even ones i already know really well) and i hide, bored and alone rather than be with them. I am always genereally quieter...but the things I can do vary so greatly..from being (almost) confident to being a complete nervous wreck who can't see anyone.

I have no idea how i can go from one extreme to the other. Depending on which day you catch me I would tell you I have extreme SA or im just a little shy!! Any ideas about this would be really appreciated.....

Thanks :D
 

Cal

Well-known member
I understand what you're saying completely, I'm generally content with how things are in my life. I have anxiety like pretty much everyone else on this forum, sometimes it's just mild, but other times it's unbearable and I feel like I can't function at all. I've accepted that's the way I am though, so I literally drag myself out of the house and do something productive to get over those feelings.

Then there are other times where my state of mind completely shifts, to the point where I don't feel like the same person. Nothing is enjoyable, nothing seems worthwhile, I just want to sit around and be an antisocial blob. It's hard for me to explain, but to wake up feeling that way for no reason is a bit scary, because I don't really trust myself when I'm like that. It's not like I lose control, but I just can't seem to care about anything, and that's when I make stupid decisions that I later regret.

Luckily this doesn't happen often, but I'd like to understand anyway. Sorry I can't really give any advice, I'm pretty clueless on the issue. But at least you know there are other people going through the same thing. :)
 

PennyLane

Well-known member
Sounds like you may be bipolar.

Hey Jake123

I thought about bipolar and looked it up (i know i should see a doc..but scared!) It says with this my changes in mood should last at least a week, mine can be hourly, daily and I also don't get the effects they describe as mania...I simply become a little more confident and im less affected by others opinions, but not really more than that like described on the bipolar websites.

I dont really go from high to low....more fine (or "normal" but i know everyone hates this word) to really low levels of confidence (not really depression, this is where the symptoms fit perfectly with SA...it just isn't constant)

Im also wondering about borderline personality disorder....
 

Akash9138

Active member
I also feel like i have split personality. Sometimes my behaviour become out of control like i start to stare at people with an obession and it became out of control like someone is controling my mind. I can't put my eyes away from people eyes.
 

Akash9138

Active member
I also feel like i have split personality. Sometimes my behaviour become out of control like i start to stare at people with an obession and it became out of control like someone is controling my mind. I can't put my eyes away from people eyes.
 
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