I think this means I fail at life

K

Krista

Well-known member
or at least that's what it feels like. So I gathered up all my courage to ask this guy out and then stayed home all day today and didn't go...

I woke up in a good mood today and tried to keep a positive spin on the day, remembering what was in store for me but around the time he said he'd call to finalize details I got freaked out. I got dressed and checked in the mirror but everytime I did it only helped to make me feel worse. I don't want to say that I need to spend my time in front of a mirror but when I'm allowing my thoughts to wander I keep thinking I look horrible to everyone, that everyone is talking about me and I know that if I can't stand to look at myself, how can anyone else? So after that I had to put myself in check and tell myself not to get overstressed.

Too late. I panicked and got into bed and let the answering machine pick it up. So basically I feel like I ruined that and he'll think I'm some kind of rude person and probably not bother with me again which I don't blame him for. So much for a guy, I spent my night with a cherry limeade and all my Spider Man comics to read. Ugh. Good thing I love Spider Man. The night didn't feel like a total waste. Or at least that's what I gotta tell myself lol.
 
Last edited:
Harleyq

Harleyq

Well-known member
Oh, it was just one night, give yourself a break :) Sometimes we can't make engagements, it happens to all of us, S.A. or not. You can always try, try again - in fact you HAVE to try again or it won't happen. Maybe call him back and apologize for not being available but you had some personal issues to take care of (which is true) and would he like to reschedule?

It does two things for you - for one, if you're attempting to contact him as opposed to never calling back again, it shows you're genuinely and sincerely interested and eases any worries he may have that you blew him off. Two, it gives you a second chance for a date.
 
206Raider

206Raider

Well-known member
yeah don't be too hard on yourself, I know exactly how you were probably feeling, I've done that too. Get myself all ready then I keep finding things wrong and starting thinking about all the things that will go wrong and your heart beats faster and feel it's better to just save the awkwardness and embarressment. But don't get too down it's just one day, just tell the guy you were sick.

P.S. Venom is awesome lol
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
I suppose I could try another go at it but I feel like it won't be worth it. I just hate pushing people away on my own accord and then getting sad seeing couples and wish I could have that.

On another comic book/superhero related note, Venom is awesome..although Carnage comes in a close second and Harleyq...someone posted a thread about crushes past and present and mentioned your name but I think I took it as Harley Quinn from Batman lol I'm sorry. As you can see I'm a huge comic book nerd.
 
Harleyq

Harleyq

Well-known member
Krista said:
I suppose I could try another go at it but I feel like it won't be worth it. I just hate pushing people away on my own accord and then getting sad seeing couples and wish I could have that.

On another comic book/superhero related note, Venom is awesome..although Carnage comes in a close second and Harleyq...someone posted a thread about crushes past and present and mentioned your name but I think I took it as Harley Quinn from Batman lol I'm sorry. As you can see I'm a huge comic book nerd.
Click to expand...

I think it's worth a shot but it's up to you and what you feel comfortable with. Sometimes it's better just to move on.

Heh, I find it amusing that the people involved in this thread have created a connection through comic books :)

No need to apologize. The Batman series are the only corporate comic book characters I can say I fully enjoy. And not even Batman. I love the villains. They're so colorful and complex and hilarious. They all have a kind of humor I can't quite seem to find in other comics. .

Other than that, I just like Garfield and a few online comics like Cyanide and Happiness and Lily of the Valley - the author of which is an SPW member :)

...sorry, I didn't mean to blather on and on about comics lol
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
Lol not at all. It's what I like to ramble about as well sometimes. Cyanide and Happiness is a good online comic. I agree, the villains in Batman are about the best out there and the main pull for readers.
 
206Raider

206Raider

Well-known member
sorry I helped derail your thread, Venom was always my favorite villian, carnage was awesome too but wasn't as well known. I used to have a ton of comic books, now I think there all gone or hidden somewhere. If there in the attic there is noway I'm going up there.
 
agoraphobickatie

agoraphobickatie

Well-known member
krista, it's up to you if you want to give it another shot or not, but don't let yourself think that he'll be all "blehh what a mean ass since she didn't answer", you can make up anything :) haha.. like the rest said, don't get too down on yourself, it happens to all of us! getting up and trying again is worth it just to cancel out the negative feelings that come along with 'failing' the first attempt...

and i'm not a comic book reader, but i've found 'rehabilitating mr. wiggles' to crack me up on several occasions with his extremely distasteful humor :) Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
I suppose I could work myself up to call him and apologize. Most of the time when I feel like I'm going into a panic attack I don't talk to anyone and I know I'm making things awkward for everyone, but people assume that I'm being rude or a biznatch(my replacement word for the other lol) so I keep that in my head a lot of the time. I just don't want him thinking the same. Thank you guys and I'll try really hard to work at it again.

Second note..I loved the derailment of the thread, so we don't have to focus on the actual problem. It's a shame about your comics, I'd go up into your attic for you if I could lol.
 
redski

redski

1
From a mans point of view and my personal own view if that actually matters to you.
Do not lie! It will just make him lose his respect towards you and he will think that you
are flaky.
If you really like him call him or text or whatever works for you and explain yourself.
You do not have to tell him everything but be as honest as you can without revealing
the whole truth and then apologize but you have to mean it.

I had this once happen to me with a girl. Back then I was wondering if the girl
was even interested in me because she gave me this flaky treatment. Of course
I had no idea what was going on in her life but that is really not my concern.
I cannot possibly know. I am no mind reader unless she fills me in a little and then
I will understand her actions...

I mean you are the one that asked him out and then you blew him off :)
 
Last edited:
Honk

Honk

Well-known member
I'm with Redski on this one.
You got the perfect oppotunity to tell him about your SA.
 
Phobologist

Phobologist

1
Krista you should definately apologize to him. You could go with the honesty route and tell him that it's a long story and you didn't know what you wanted to do, but that could weird him out. On the other hand, this happens frequently with girls, so you could just call him up and make up some bs excuse. Guys are used to it. Its not that a big deal to him, he probably just thinks you lost interest.
 
OutsideLookingIn

OutsideLookingIn

Member
Krista said:
or at least that's what it feels like. So I gathered up all my courage to ask this guy out and then stayed home all day today and didn't go...

I woke up in a good mood today and tried to keep a positive spin on the day, remembering what was in store for me but around the time he said he'd call to finalize details I got freaked out. I got dressed and checked in the mirror but everytime I did it only helped to make me feel worse. I don't want to say that I need to spend my time in front of a mirror but when I'm allowing my thoughts to wander I keep thinking I look horrible to everyone, that everyone is talking about me and I know that if I can't stand to look at myself, how can anyone else? So after that I had to put myself in check and tell myself not to get overstressed.

Too late. I panicked and got into bed and let the answering machine pick it up. So basically I feel like I ruined that and he'll think I'm some kind of rude person and probably not bother with me again which I don't blame him for. So much for a guy, I spent my night with a cherry limeade and all my Spider Man comics to read. Ugh. Good thing I love Spider Man. The night didn't feel like a total waste. Or at least that's what I gotta tell myself lol.
Click to expand...



if a guy did this to a girl, everyone would be calling him an asshole/pig, but when a girl does it "aaaaaw its okay sweeetieee"....
 
Harleyq

Harleyq

Well-known member
OutsideLookingIn said:
if a guy did this to a girl, everyone would be calling him an asshole/pig, but when a girl does it "aaaaaw its okay sweeetieee"....
Click to expand...

erm...only if you heard just the girl's side and she was upset about being stood up. If a guy had made this same post, I think he would get as much sympathy. Similarly, in the OP's case, if we hadn't heard her side and only heard the guy's side (and assuming he felt stood up), she'd be labeled as a stuck up b-tch who thinks she's too good for him. So no, I don't agree that it's always "aaaaw it's okay...." for a girl.

Although anyone who would view someone as a b-tch or an asshole for not being able to make a date after the first attempt isn't worth knowing, IMO. I've had guys bail on me at last minute for whatever reasons and I certainly didn't think of them as assholes. It's just one of those "sh-t happens" kind of things.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top