Issues with intimacy in general (Family, Relatives, Friends, Dating etc.)

C

CrazyGirl

Well-known member
since I was a young child, I had a poor connection with my parents. My childhood and teenage years were filled with feelings of lonliness and isolation. Even the connection I felt with my siblings were poor. I felt like a misfit, unseen and misunderstood. At a young age, I learned to shut down and not rely on others as a coping mechanism. I used fantasy and daydreaming rather than actual interactions with other people.

As I've been reading and learning, I've come to understand that I've always been scared to let anyone come close to me.

Some of the fear of intimacy signs I've experienced
no sharing of emotions
keeping my life to myself
lack of social interest
fear
running away from problems as they arise
bottling up my emotions
ignoring my feelings
pretending something doesn't matter when inside it does matter
compulsive behavior
excessive reading and watching tv
keeping conversations superficial
burying negative emotions under the mask of peace n love
getting upset over minor incidents
low self-confidence, low self-esteem

can anyone relate?
 
DeLasDudasInfinitas

DeLasDudasInfinitas

Well-known member
I can relate with every point in your list too. It often is a problem with people because they don't understand what happens to me and they just think I'm that way because I want to be. I also daydream a lot, using it as an escape from the things that make me feel anxious.
 
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S

Sopie123

Member
CrazyGirl said:
since I was a young child, I had a poor connection with my parents. My childhood and teenage years were filled with feelings of lonliness and isolation. Even the connection I felt with my siblings were poor. I felt like a misfit, unseen and misunderstood. At a young age, I learned to shut down and not rely on others as a coping mechanism. I used fantasy and daydreaming rather than actual interactions with other people.

As I've been reading and learning, I've come to understand that I've always been scared to let anyone come close to me.

Some of the fear of intimacy signs I've experienced
no sharing of emotions
keeping my life to myself
lack of social interest
fear
running away from problems as they arise
bottling up my emotions
ignoring my feelings
pretending something doesn't matter when inside it does matter
compulsive behavior
excessive reading and watching tv
keeping conversations superficial
burying negative emotions under the mask of peace n love
getting upset over minor incidents
low self-confidence, low self-esteem

can anyone relate?
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I am exactly the same,have been in fantasy land since I was 4,i wont tell you what age I am now but it has been a long time lol
 
B

bsammy

Well-known member
i dont think i fear intimacy, i just dont seem to get much reward out of it so it seems pointless to me..
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
CrazyGirl said:
since I was a young child, I had a poor connection with my parents. My childhood and teenage years were filled with feelings of lonliness and isolation. Even the connection I felt with my siblings were poor. I felt like a misfit, unseen and misunderstood. At a young age, I learned to shut down and not rely on others as a coping mechanism. I used fantasy and daydreaming rather than actual interactions with other people.

As I've been reading and learning, I've come to understand that I've always been scared to let anyone come close to me.
Click to expand...

This was pretty ma experience throughout childhood an' teenage years an' intae adulthood. Also not fittin' in, ah think, also factors intae 'hings anaw. Still don't huv a strong connection wi' ma family. Ah feel like the odd yin oot - well, ah um, in many ways.

Never really had a strong bond wi' either o' ma parents, emotionally.

Though, fur me, at a young age, ah learnt how tae make folk laugh - comedy was ma copin' mechanism for sometime. Not so much now...

Also, huvin ma trust broken by people who apparently cared about me makes intimacy quite difficult.

That and a fear of being judged harshly and rejected.
 
C

CrazyGirl

Well-known member
Good to see others who share the same feelings as me. Makes me feel less crazy not wanting to get close to people
 
Nazim

Nazim

Banned
Looking back, I could relate to many from that list.
From what I've learnt, it never gets easy, you just keep growing stronger.
 
Argentum

Argentum

Well-known member
I can somewhat relate, and I think for me it's in part learned and in part innate. I was never the touchy-feely type, but being lied to, deliberately intimidated, mocked, and drugged has made me cautious to the point of struggling to let others in. There was no worse point during my teenage years than realizing that a couple of people weren't laughing with me, they were manipulating me into acting like a fool in order to laugh at me.
 
THeCARS1979

THeCARS1979

Well-known member
CrazyGirl said:
since I was a young child, I had a poor connection with my parents. My childhood and teenage years were filled with feelings of lonliness and isolation. Even the connection I felt with my siblings were poor. I felt like a misfit, unseen and misunderstood. At a young age, I learned to shut down and not rely on others as a coping mechanism. I used fantasy and daydreaming rather than actual interactions with other people.

As I've been reading and learning, I've come to understand that I've always been scared to let anyone come close to me.

Some of the fear of intimacy signs I've experienced
no sharing of emotions
keeping my life to myself
lack of social interest
fear
running away from problems as they arise
bottling up my emotions
ignoring my feelings
pretending something doesn't matter when inside it does matter
compulsive behavior
excessive reading and watching tv
keeping conversations superficial
burying negative emotions under the mask of peace n love
getting upset over minor incidents
low self-confidence, low self-esteem

can anyone relate?
Click to expand...

I can relate, Im off and on about that because I do that too because of years of some of that shit. family incidents and being treated as a outcast at times years ago and I think that things that happened so many years ago still affect me and aggravate me.:question:
 
Metal_isthe_Answer

Metal_isthe_Answer

Well-known member
CrazyGirl said:
Some of the fear of intimacy signs I've experienced
no sharing of emotions
keeping my life to myself
lack of social interest
bottling up my emotions
ignoring my feelings
compulsive behavior
excessive reading and watching tv
getting upset over minor incidents
low self-confidence, low self-esteem

can anyone relate?
Click to expand...

These ones sound more like me, but I'm not too sure about the TV thing, there's really only a handful of shows I watch, maybe 5 to 6 total, only 3 of which is daily. I actually just watch about an hour a day.
 
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