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Old 10-09-2008
JonnyD's Avatar
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i want to share this story, because i really want to tell someone but don't have the guts to tell to somone i know.

Every single day when i'm going to work, i see that girl - she passes by me when i'm going, she is coming in the other direction - and when i see her i feel like a 10 yo kid, i tramble and i feel nervous, and those butterflys in my stomache :oops:

i can't actually believe i feel like that because, i've never heard her voice, never talked to her and i see her 5 days a week, for about 5 seconds... she is a total stranger to me... she could be married or be a serial killer!

i don't think i will ever talk to her, i don't know what to talk and i won't stop her in the middle of the way, she will think i'm crazy!

I just wanted to say it somewhere , maybe it would help :roll:
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Old 10-09-2008
EvilFlyingCow's Avatar
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No I don't think you love her, I think you are just infatuated with here. There is a difference. But I do think you should try talking to her.
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Old 10-09-2008
Rodox's Avatar
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I dont know,I only know that I became obsessed with this girl for about 4 years,and I only had minimal contact with her,but she was always around me....I even remember of her once in a while,kinda creepy.......
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Old 10-09-2008
 

I think you should smile at her or something next time you pass her and see what happens. But I agree with the others I don't think you're in love. You just see her as this mysterious and attractive girl and that usually gets people arroused a bit. But I definetly think you should try to talk to her or something. Just smile at her tomorrow, next day maybe say "hi", next day do something a little more and so on until you're eventually making small talk. Then you can try to get her number or ask her to eat lunch with you or something.

good luck!!
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Old 10-09-2008
lettypagb's Avatar
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NO ,u should try to do something embarassing to see if u fall in love ,cause looks like u want.
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Old 10-09-2008
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This is something that happens to everyone...it's physical attraction. It's completely normal and it can be quite enjoyable. At least you have some little lift during the day, something to look forward to!

If it's someone you see often I would just engage in light banter with her, just a little at a time ("Hello, working late again?" etc) and then build on it slowly. If she's remotely interested in you then you will know by how friendly she is towards you. If she's not, then no harm done.

As far as wondering if she's married is concerned, just look to see if there's a ring on her left hand ring finger.

If it comes to nothing, enjoy it for what it is, don't let it torture you. Feeling this way about certain people is what can make life enjoyable. It reminds us that we're alive!
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Old 10-09-2008
Kien's Avatar
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I fall in love because the girl is pretty, not because I know her.
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Old 10-09-2008
JonnyD's Avatar
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when i read this post i said to my self - no sleep can be better then beer :P - i would post it it wasnt so late night, when i remembered i feel so stupid.

Quote:
I dont know,I only know that I became obsessed with this girl for about 4 years,and I only had minimal contact with her,but she was always around me....I even remember of her once in a while,kinda creepy.......
Obsessed Like thinking of her all times? dreaming about marriage and daydreaming about her?


I just said she could be married or a serial killer to ilustrate how i don't know her. But i have trained looking for rings lastly, a shame so many women has them ...


Quote:
his is something that happens to everyone...it's physical attraction. It's completely normal and it can be quite enjoyable. At least you have some little lift during the day, something to look forward to!
I really thoughtit was just physical attraction, but i think it's most likelly it's a problem with me than with how she looks. Yes i think she is pretty, but i see many girls as pretty as her everday. why her?

Quote:
This sounds like pure phantasy. You are building this girl up to be your saviour or "the one" but she isn't.
I believe Icarus has a point, phantasies... I think i'm using her as a scapegoat for my romantic feelings, i need to place my affection and romantic dreams somewhere... and i somehow choosed the poor girl with no bias, because i have no social life in which to find someone to share this feelings.

But i still thinking it's kinda stupid - i feel like i'm a 12 yo kid , if i ever tell someone, i dreamed of marrying her, people will laught at my me... why people think it's wrong to a man have romantic dreams? (i can think of an aswer)
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Old 10-10-2008
Rodox's Avatar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyD
Quote:
I dont know,I only know that I became obsessed with this girl for about 4 years,and I only had minimal contact with her,but she was always around me....I even remember of her once in a while,kinda creepy.......
Obsessed Like thinking of her all times? dreaming about marriage and daydreaming about her?

Yep,I kept looking at her all the time like a dumbass,she wasnt the best looking girl either,but she had a lot of guys after her,I doubt she would even look at me twice.
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Old 10-12-2008
of_darkness's Avatar
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That's happened loads since I started uni. I feel a tiny bit of that with one of my flatmates but I talk to her so it's different. I just reeealy like her! and a girl on my course, I just get a feeling from her that beats plain physical attraction. She's beyond that and I'm sure I love everything about her despite not having much contact. I know what you mean, it's just "oh my god I wish I could be with her!" and it feels so good and uplifting... wouldn't call it love though.

It's sort of heartbreaking in a way. There are so many girls out there, who people call "buff" and stupid ugly words like that (I was talking to a friend about someone and he said "is she buff?" in a pretty serious way! whaa?) and girls who plaster on makeup who are attractive to most guys. But when you see a girl who is beyond all that and so naturally beautiful in every way, you feel like she's someone special and you deserve to be with her. That's the downside, it's crushing. Even if you don't do anything she'll always be there, like your girl walking down the street.....

but not to be confused with love!! either talk to her or regret if for the rest of your life! that makes sense, right? think about "that girl you never spoke to" ...
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Old 02-21-2014
 

I remember having a crush on some girl at work many years ago
in my early 20's (she was working as a secretary) & because I was shy
& still am a bit I could'nt approach her to talk so I pretended that I was
with her & then after this infatuation had been going on for a couple of months
she suddenly left & I felt sort of heartbroken I suppose that I didn't try
& talk to her but the worst thing was afterwards I sort of hung on to that
fantasy that I had gotten to know her & developed a relationship with her
& eventually got married & so-forth & this went on for many years &
of course when you do things like that in that time you miss out on
so many other opportunities that I look back now realising how crazy
it all was to become so obsessed with someone I never knew

Please don't let this happen to you

John (Littlewilly) UK
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Old 02-22-2014
theoutsider's Avatar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyD View Post
i want to share this story, because i really want to tell someone but don't have the guts to tell to somone i know.

Every single day when i'm going to work, i see that girl - she passes by me when i'm going, she is coming in the other direction - and when i see her i feel like a 10 yo kid, i tramble and i feel nervous, and those butterflys in my stomache :oops:

i can't actually believe i feel like that because, i've never heard her voice, never talked to her and i see her 5 days a week, for about 5 seconds... she is a total stranger to me... she could be married or be a serial killer!

i don't think i will ever talk to her, i don't know what to talk and i won't stop her in the middle of the way, she will think i'm crazy!

I just wanted to say it somewhere , maybe it would help :roll:
Responding to your title, I would say that it's not possible to fall in love with somebody you don't know because you don't know anything about their personality. From your description, it sounds like you're seriously infatuated with her looks and possibly the fantasy of what she could be like. We've all been there and, yes, it can be difficult to approach someone like that. Maybe you can start small by just saying, "Hi" if you two walk by each other frequently. If you don't walk by each other maybe you can "arrange" to cross paths with her since you are familiar with her schedule and route. Sorry if this post just reiterates what others have already have already said/suggested. When I read an interesting post, I usually make a comment before reading the others so my opinion/words aren't influenced...lol.
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Old 02-22-2014
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Side note:

I once had a crush on a girl who was very pretty who I knew nothing about. This went on for about two months until I finally told a mutual friend how I felt. The mutual friend told the girl and made arrangements for both of us to hang out with some other friends as a way of getting know each other. Almost from the moment she opened her mouth, my beautiful fantasy of her was crushed. She was nothing like the beautiful person I had imagined, personality-wise. She was harsh, crass and rather ignorant. Sometimes fantasies are best left as fantasies. Sorry, don't mean to jinx your chances just thought I'd share. Hope that doesn't happen to you.
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