moving out of the nest?

are there any other adults here who opt to live at home?

i'm 28 and currently living at a parent's house. while there are a lot of annoyances about it there are obviously the benefits. there are minor petty annoyances like noises while i'm trying to sleep, people using my toiletries, things like that. the benefit is that for the most part i can come and go as i please, i have most of the same freedoms as if i were to move out on my own (as long as i clean up after myself which is nothing since i'm ocd anyway) and obviously i save a lot of money.

but. at the same time i really don't like the stigma of "being 28 and living at home." like there is something wrong with me (well, there probably is but... whatever). i don't like having the stigma of being a slacker/loser/leach since i work hard and go to school. but people don't take you seriously if you are living at home. i am a hypocrite and judge people who live at home, myself, if they aren't trying to better themselves, you know what i mean? i go to school and work, trying to pay off school loans.

i imagine getting a studio apartment somewhere but then i have all these concerns about living by myself. what if someone broke in? what if something happened to me? no one would know for days, maybe weeks. i have lived by myself before but it was still at a parent's house (they moved out somewhere else) and i knew i could rely on neighbors if i needed help since they would keep an eye on me just to make sure i was ok. also, i have moved with a boyfriend but then i had the security of someone being there.

i am kind of afraid of living alone. i could get a roommate, but why? living at home is practically the same thing except better because i don't have to deal with the social interaction, the bullshit hellos, the "are you using the kitchen?" their friends coming over, etc and i can utilize the money i save.

THE PROS AND CONS OF LIVING AT HOME:

pros:
- saving money/paying off school
- a nice, newly remodeled house in a pretty decent area
- free meals sometimes
- not tied into the ball/chain responsibility of a year long apartment lease (what if i end up hating the place or my neighbors and want to move out?)

cons:
- the stigma of living at home
- having very little space (a tiny bedroom which is not much room for my belongings)


THE PROS AND CONS OF MOVING OUT:

pros:
- no more stigma, people take you more seriously
- more living space
- don't have to tiptoe around at night
- don't have to share the bathroom

cons:
- feeling like i am wasting money that could go towards paying off my school loan.
- insecurities (what if something happens to me? no one would even know for maybe weeks)
- i am a student and can't afford a nice place so there is a good probability that my neighbors could be ghetto. i hate ghetto people. no, seriously. i fucking hate them- they are rude and loud. who wants to deal with that?
- i have a chihuahua and he needs to piss throughout the day. due to work and school i am gone a lot, so this poses a problem.

i think i feel like moving out is the socially acceptable thing to do. but living at home is so damn convenient and i feel like it is the thing to do to truly help me get ahead financially. if you have school loans hanging over your head, you know what i mean.

i don't know... i suppose i just needed a place to vent about this. comments welcome.

Hey I can relate to this. I'm 26 and i feel such a loser that i still live at home. I'm partially afraid to live on my own and have responsibilities like paying utilities and the such, but the main reason is financial, and i don't have anyone i could share with and besides i need independence. Perhaps i could scrape by having my own place, but i think that would mean giving up things like my car which i love.

yeah i know what you mean. I'll be 28 next week and i'm still at home. sometimes it sucks but it definately has its benefits as well-good food, warm house, no worries. i did live away when studying but that was 4 years ago and that was in a damp dark horrible student room.

I seem to be in a strange place at the moment, i've paid off my student dept and have quite a bit of money saved up but the job i've got at the moment is crap money and i'm finding it difficult to find a better paid job that i like, i went to about 4 job interviews last year. This is mainly due to my social phobia/anxiety/lack of confidence i think in not getting a better job. Its takes me a very long time to fit in and become comfortable in a new work place.

I think I can probably stay at home for another year but that's about it, after that I need to live on my own and fend for myself. The thought of coming home after work to a empty cold house doesn't fill me with joy though

dottie said:

what if someone broke in? what if something happened to me? no one would know for days, maybe weeks.

Click to expand...

People are more likely to break into where you live now, presumably, since it has more goodies to steal. If someone breaks in and shoots you now, how does it help that your parents are there? Why do you care how long it takes to discover your body when you die, since you're just as dead either way?

i knew i could rely on neighbors if i needed help since they would keep an eye on me just to make sure i was ok.

Neighbors keep an eye on you? Unless you have a medical condition, that sounds odd. Anyhow, though I've never met any of my neighbors, I'm sure they'd call 911 for me if I screamed loud enough... which is all the help needed.

the ball/chain responsibility of a year long apartment lease (what if i end up hating the place or my neighbors and want to move out?)

Yeah, I worry about that whenever I move to a new apartment. Just check out the area first. Walk around. Try to find a place on the top floor to lessen noise.

I kinda wish I'd lived with my parents longer to save more money... but there's no way I'd want to move back in now, or accept a roommate, because living alone is really nice.