The understanding that GSAD is differentiated from specific social phobias, got me thinking, and I realized I have suffered from one to several specific phobias since the 4th grade. I am still working on these, and I would like to share them with you. I have made great improvement and will detail both the phobia and the treatment. As always, your input on how best to treat these phobias is greatly appreciated.
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1. lutropublicaphobia - Fear of using the restroom in public.
It started in 4th grade. I attended a summer day-care center and one day I had an upset stomach and clogged the toilet in the club-house. Ashamed and embarrassed, I tried to discretely escape but an irate counselor demanded that the person responsible speak up. I had to raise my hand out of fear of punishment (I figured someone would turn me in eventualy), and was horribly embarrassed in front of everyone. Since then I have been afraid of using the restroom in public or around others, including at people's houses. The anxiety eventually resulted in the unhealthy practice of taking shits only once every two to three days, during much of college. It was debilitating until a few years ago, and now I experience only slight anxiety.
The Therapy:
I started eating better so I wouldn't take MASSIVE shits. I made a concerted effort to use the restroom once each day or once every other day, and to never hold it in. I practiced "controling" my bathroom sessions so that there was little chance of any particular flush clogging the toilet. (Seriously, before this treatment I had to cut the shit with a knife a few times!). I made sure to use the restroom at times no one else was likely to come in (during dinner in the dorms, or late at night). This compensatory behavior lasted for several years. In this way, I convinced myself that I was unlikely to clogg the toilet, that no one would catch me, and that if it did clogg a plunger could easily fix it. Hundreds of repititions and special provisions eliminated the phobia.
2. Chorophobia - Fear of dancing.
Beginning in the sixth grade I developed a terror of dancing in front of other people. I did not generaly fear others' critical appraisals, so it wasn't related to GSAD which developed much later. A buddy dragged me to two school dances which both proved to be excruciating experiences. I never went to the 8th grade graduation dance, and I never went to a single dance in high-school. At my first party ever I refused to dance because of this fear. The problem remained until freshman year of College during which time I became one of the bolder men at parties and dances, such that people even admire my technique of getting girls to dance. ::
The Therapy:
I decided I had enough and asked an acquaintance to teach me to dance. He did and from that point on I forced myself to dance with girls at every single party and dance I went to. It was excruciating for several months but I eventualy became less shy as I realized no one was judging me or even paying attention. Alcohol helped a good deal. I developed various methods of pulling girls so that I could reduce my embarrassment. Over the years I got better at dancing without alcohol and poor lighting until I could eventualy dance while sober so long as there is a decent crowd. I no longer have a phobia of dancing in general, but I still fear being the center of attention. Exposure therapy with compensatory methods worked very well.
3. 'Objectophobia' - Fear of Objectifying Women
Since the sixth grade I have had a fear of objectifying women - by which I mean displaying or focusing on their sexual appeal. It began with the belly-shirt craze that swept the country in the later nineties. I felt ashamed of myself for looking at their bellies and finding them sexually attractive. :: From there it generalized to feeling anxious any time I found a woman physically exciting. If a girl discovered me checking out her body I would become extremely embarrassed and ashamed. Criticism of male sexuality, pornography, or of my physical attraction to women, would incite intense anxiety. This phobia was the basis for my masturbation compulsion which began in 10th grade. As a consequence, exposure to sex-negative criticism would occassionaly induce uncontrollable masturbation sessions. The phobia didn't get better until three or four years ago, with major improvement in the last six months.
The Therapy:
The phobia is based on several maladaptive beliefs I learned from my mother, as well as falsefied facts disseminated in feminist and conservative political propaganda. Exposure to people who held more sex-positive beliefs helped to ease my anxiety. On several occasions in the last few years I have examined feminist propaganda in an effort to debunk it. I investigated their proported facts, used the positions of sex-positive feminists, and examined my own ideas to reorient my thinking. I finaly came to the conclusion that: males sexuality is largely visual and women seek to appeal to male interests for their own benefit. Women are as much their bodies as they are their minds, and anyone who doesn't understand this is warped by a sexphobic ideology. I aslo decided I am willing for women to stop dressing in appealing clothing, stripping, shooting porn, or doing anything else that is visually erotic, if it so suits them. I understand that so long as male sexuality is visual, women will display their bodies in order to be appealing. This realization has greatly reduced my anxiety.
4. 'Hardonophobia' - Fear of Getting Aroused
In 6th grade I developed a fear of getting a physicaly aroused in the presence of others. This phobia was generalized to any circumstances in which others might know I was turned on, especially if it was obvious. For instance, when in 8th grade a very hot girl sat on my lap, I became extremely embarrassed and worried she would feel me getting excited. I therefore avoided future such situations or worried obsessively when they occured. When I first started dancing in freshman year of college, I got very excited and was extremely worried the girl dancing with me would rebuke me. It continued to be a problem in future dances. This phobia was a typical element of my masturbation compulsion and I would obessively imagine others criticising me in a derisive fashion for getting excited. The phobia has become less of a problem in the last two years with major improvement in the past six months.
The Therapy:
Exposure to situations in which others knew I was turned on and did not respond negatively has lead to significant reduction in my anxiety. People with more sex-positive attitudes have helped me to think of arousal as a normal process which isn't shameful or particularly embarrassing. Improvement in my social phobia has also helped. It continues to be a problem but is much better.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. lutropublicaphobia - Fear of using the restroom in public.
It started in 4th grade. I attended a summer day-care center and one day I had an upset stomach and clogged the toilet in the club-house. Ashamed and embarrassed, I tried to discretely escape but an irate counselor demanded that the person responsible speak up. I had to raise my hand out of fear of punishment (I figured someone would turn me in eventualy), and was horribly embarrassed in front of everyone. Since then I have been afraid of using the restroom in public or around others, including at people's houses. The anxiety eventually resulted in the unhealthy practice of taking shits only once every two to three days, during much of college. It was debilitating until a few years ago, and now I experience only slight anxiety.
The Therapy:
I started eating better so I wouldn't take MASSIVE shits. I made a concerted effort to use the restroom once each day or once every other day, and to never hold it in. I practiced "controling" my bathroom sessions so that there was little chance of any particular flush clogging the toilet. (Seriously, before this treatment I had to cut the shit with a knife a few times!). I made sure to use the restroom at times no one else was likely to come in (during dinner in the dorms, or late at night). This compensatory behavior lasted for several years. In this way, I convinced myself that I was unlikely to clogg the toilet, that no one would catch me, and that if it did clogg a plunger could easily fix it. Hundreds of repititions and special provisions eliminated the phobia.
2. Chorophobia - Fear of dancing.
Beginning in the sixth grade I developed a terror of dancing in front of other people. I did not generaly fear others' critical appraisals, so it wasn't related to GSAD which developed much later. A buddy dragged me to two school dances which both proved to be excruciating experiences. I never went to the 8th grade graduation dance, and I never went to a single dance in high-school. At my first party ever I refused to dance because of this fear. The problem remained until freshman year of College during which time I became one of the bolder men at parties and dances, such that people even admire my technique of getting girls to dance. :
:The Therapy:
I decided I had enough and asked an acquaintance to teach me to dance. He did and from that point on I forced myself to dance with girls at every single party and dance I went to. It was excruciating for several months but I eventualy became less shy as I realized no one was judging me or even paying attention. Alcohol helped a good deal. I developed various methods of pulling girls so that I could reduce my embarrassment. Over the years I got better at dancing without alcohol and poor lighting until I could eventualy dance while sober so long as there is a decent crowd. I no longer have a phobia of dancing in general, but I still fear being the center of attention. Exposure therapy with compensatory methods worked very well.
3. 'Objectophobia' - Fear of Objectifying Women
Since the sixth grade I have had a fear of objectifying women - by which I mean displaying or focusing on their sexual appeal. It began with the belly-shirt craze that swept the country in the later nineties. I felt ashamed of myself for looking at their bellies and finding them sexually attractive. :
: From there it generalized to feeling anxious any time I found a woman physically exciting. If a girl discovered me checking out her body I would become extremely embarrassed and ashamed. Criticism of male sexuality, pornography, or of my physical attraction to women, would incite intense anxiety. This phobia was the basis for my masturbation compulsion which began in 10th grade. As a consequence, exposure to sex-negative criticism would occassionaly induce uncontrollable masturbation sessions. The phobia didn't get better until three or four years ago, with major improvement in the last six months. The Therapy:
The phobia is based on several maladaptive beliefs I learned from my mother, as well as falsefied facts disseminated in feminist and conservative political propaganda. Exposure to people who held more sex-positive beliefs helped to ease my anxiety. On several occasions in the last few years I have examined feminist propaganda in an effort to debunk it. I investigated their proported facts, used the positions of sex-positive feminists, and examined my own ideas to reorient my thinking. I finaly came to the conclusion that: males sexuality is largely visual and women seek to appeal to male interests for their own benefit. Women are as much their bodies as they are their minds, and anyone who doesn't understand this is warped by a sexphobic ideology. I aslo decided I am willing for women to stop dressing in appealing clothing, stripping, shooting porn, or doing anything else that is visually erotic, if it so suits them. I understand that so long as male sexuality is visual, women will display their bodies in order to be appealing. This realization has greatly reduced my anxiety.
4. 'Hardonophobia' - Fear of Getting Aroused
In 6th grade I developed a fear of getting a physicaly aroused in the presence of others. This phobia was generalized to any circumstances in which others might know I was turned on, especially if it was obvious. For instance, when in 8th grade a very hot girl sat on my lap, I became extremely embarrassed and worried she would feel me getting excited. I therefore avoided future such situations or worried obsessively when they occured. When I first started dancing in freshman year of college, I got very excited and was extremely worried the girl dancing with me would rebuke me. It continued to be a problem in future dances. This phobia was a typical element of my masturbation compulsion and I would obessively imagine others criticising me in a derisive fashion for getting excited. The phobia has become less of a problem in the last two years with major improvement in the past six months.
The Therapy:
Exposure to situations in which others knew I was turned on and did not respond negatively has lead to significant reduction in my anxiety. People with more sex-positive attitudes have helped me to think of arousal as a normal process which isn't shameful or particularly embarrassing. Improvement in my social phobia has also helped. It continues to be a problem but is much better.
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