Och aye the noo

theslowesthand said:

This is funny

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:bigsmile: That's wus great, verges off intae jibberish by the end, though.

Also, ah could only make oot 2 actual Scottish words. Tattie, and eh... well the other words a bit rude. Pretty sure the word "stonner" get said never the end of that clip. In case yer wonderin' that Scottish slang for an erection. :shyness:

Ah feel like a shadow o' ma old self nowadays. Gettin' less joyful as ah get older. More likely to see the worst in everything, like my mum does, whereas as before ah wus positive and open to new experiences.

I'm no as quick witted or as funny as ah used to be. Or interesting for that matter. My memory and recollection is going to shit. Ma eye-sight is gradually gettin' worse. My cerebral palsy is 50/50 as far as better or worse goes.

Even things ah used to enjoy doing, like getting out to concerts and comedy shows huv become... Well, ah cannae think o' the exact word. But ah dinnae even look forward to 'em, like ah once used to. Which is quite sad, since those are the only times I ever get oot the hoose and go somewhere worthwhile. Ah guess, that's the only thing ah cun be grateful to ma sister for, at least she's more willing to help me get out and about more. Ma mum doesnae even trust me enough to go out in ma electric wheelchair on ma own. But then she doesnae allow me the freedom to do much, if anything.

Which is probably why ah don't feel like ah huv the control over ma life that ah'd like. Constantly being told by ma family that ah must act a certain way, believe this and that, agree with their opinions, be as outgoing as they are. Yet, I'm none of those things. Still talked down to and treat like I'm a child, or dumb. Or both, because o' ma disability. Though, only by family, ah might add.

I'm actually start to wonder if people are even worth gettin' to know nowadays? :idontknow: Probably not, if ma family any indication as to how people behave.

It's probably better that ah keep tae myself. Too late to start trying to fit intae society, anyway. When ah never did to start with. Though that's yin o' the frustrating things for me, being expected to be this social butterfly in society that doesnae exactly treat disabled folk aw that well.

F**k my life... Just tae f**k with it aw. The sooner it ends tha happier ah'll be. Believe you me. :kickingmyself: :thumbdown: :veryangry:

Talk nicely? F**kin' hell! All ah said wus, "Mum, could run upstair and get the printer cable for me, please". She stall sayin' she didnae know what ah wus on about, but she know fine well what ah meant. Then she gans:


Ah think I'm startin' tae understand why she got aw that abuse in her past relationships, as awful as that is to say, like. But y'know, whit wus that triggered that response? Ah didnae yell, ah wus calm, ah think ah wus polite. Then ah get the silent when ah point oot how she's never like this with ma sisters. Only me... No wonder ah don't go out ma way to talk ma mum, my family or anybuddy for that matter.

Must be great being a wummin, though. Ye cun always play the victim tae avoid takin' responsibility, accuse a man of being mean tae ya or falsely accuse him of rape and... You get believed. Ya lucky c*nts! So much fur gender equality, eh, ladies...?!

Nae offense intended by that last remark, just an observation based on how my family act towards me. And they apparently think highly of me, yet they blame me for nearly everythin'... :kickingmyself: Y'know what, I'm done! Hud enough, this world obviously isn't meant for the likes o' me. :sad:

I'm just a waste o' feckin' space, anyway. ::

By the way, ah dinnae mean this in an offensive way or nuthin'. But it'll probably sound worse than it's intended.

Right, how do stupid people huv smart kids? Ah ask this only because this is somethin' one o' ma cousins said afore huvin her ain bairn. And her and her boyfriend are no the sharpest knife in the draw, if ye ken whit ah mean? Ah don't mean that as insult, they openly admit this themselves.

Just raising this question, cause ah hud the nerve to imply this same assumption to ma ain muther outta frustration when she started her "Ah don't know..." :idontknow: routine when ah asked her tae get me the printer cable, ah mentioned in ma previous post.

Y'know, it's just a bit too f**kin' convienent that she cun do that, in my opinion. But then she got her hair colour as an excuse. Or certainly seems to play up that whole "dumb blonde" stereotype.

Sorry, if ah've offended any blonde haired wimmin by this post.

It's just irritatin' huvin tae be dependent upon ma mum because o' ma disability, yet she constantly pleads ignorance whenever it's me askin' her a simple question.

Don't know if it'd be worth us parting way, because ah've hud enough o' this pish for the last 16 years o' ma life. Constantly being contradicted whenever ah speak, never allow to do what I want. Being treat like I'm still a child. Ah feel as though ah've raised masel' since age 12. Because ma mum and dad didnae know how ye raise a disabled child. It's quite easy really...

Know their limitation. Lead by example. Teach 'em what they'll need to know in order to survive when yer no longer around. And don't constantly f**kin' sheltered them from the outside world.

But ah digress. So, aye, should ah start makin' plans for possibly leaving the hame ah grow up in? Y'know, since most of my memory aren't great. And ah don't enjoy being around my mum anymore, not that ah don't appreciate everythin' she's done for me. It's just constantly being told I'm an arsehole, and being afraid to speak for fear of how she'll react is becoming hellish.

Plus, it's gettin' harder and harder to laugh off her remarks when she tells I'm just wasting my time doing somethin' I enjoy. Funny how yin stupid argument can make ye realise how miserable ya actually are, huh? :sad:

More family drama on Facebook.

Now ma older sister's just phoned up Mum greetin'. Another argument with her man, talk of them gettin' a divorce. :kickingmyself: Ah honestly cannae take much mair o' this. Huvin tae f**kin' listen tae them aw gossip and complain. :veryangry: And if they do end up separating and she moves back in with me and mum. Then I'm leavin', because ma older sister is always startin' shit with me. Bemoaning the fact ah hate being socialable.

Should've disowned the f**kin' lotta them when ah hud the chance. :thumbdown:

Quite glad ah never did these 3 things in ma life:

• Got married
• Had kids
• Joined Facebook

Judge me aw ye want, but trust me, if you hud to grow up around the kinda people I'm related to, you wouldnae want tae bring a child intae the world either.

Graeme1988 said:

F**k my life... Just tae f**k with it aw. The sooner it ends tha happier ah'll be. Believe you me. :kickingmyself: :thumbdown: :veryangry:

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Same here pal. Maybe for different reasons. My life's just a neverending struggle to "stay afloat", to not be bored to feckin buggery. I keep tellin meself 'this will pass', but lately that's all i seem to be doing, sayin that. I thnk the day i die will be the happiest day of me life. :sad:

theslowesthand said:

Same here pal. Maybe for different reasons. My life's just a neverending struggle to "stay afloat", to not be bored to feckin buggery. I keep tellin meself 'this will pass', but lately that's all i seem to be doing, sayin that. I thnk the day i die will be the happiest day of me life. :sad:

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Naw, that's pretty much my life as well. Tryin' to keep masel' occupied, but no huvin enough to fufil that. Other than readin', watchin' the telly or watchin' a movie, documentary or DVD boxset to pass the time.

Coupled with the constant pressure from family to be more of a people person. Which is kinda hard tae do when yer only remaining parent snubs ye everytime ye try to interact with her. Doesnae exactly help matters that ma mum hus a schizophrenic attitude towards me. Yin minutes it's, yer a great person. The next thing I'm telt I'm a unpleasant, ill-mannered wee shitebag. :sad:

But I'm used to it. Used to being ignored, used to being yelled at for simply askin' a question and gettin' a hostile reaction from ma mum. Used to be misunderstood. Being perceived as anti-social, etc.

Feelin' really stressed. Mum didnae sleep much last night. Tells me she's worried aboot nuthin'. Then proceed to tell me it's my older sister. And the pending visit of her, her husband and their wee bairn.

Though, so am I. Because ah always get shit for no being around 'em. When the fact I'd rather not be around 'em. Simply because ma sister is volatile, aggressive, temperimental wummin underneath that loud, overly confident front. And just oor muther, she doesnae like when things don't go her way.

Ah mean, would enjoy bein' aroon that kinda person aw the time? Regardless o' gender. Where yin wrong word, and then f**kin' BANG!! Argument! Yellin', doors slamin', grettin'. F**kin' tired o' huvin to side with ma sister. She brings it on hersel', doesnae deserve any sympathy in ma book. Sorry, if that sounds harsh. But, ken whit ah mean? If yer gonnae throw a tantrum because over some semantic shite. You've got a serious feckin' problem.

At least, my issue with my oldest sister insulting me in public wus aboot huvin a bit o' respect and decency. More than being compared to a terrorist.

And ah've telt mum how ah feel. Not that she cares whit ah think, like. Being the only f**kin' man in her life has yet to leave her - though that days fast approaching. But still, ah feel I'd be in much better health if ah ousted as much stress and drama from ma life as possible. Basically, disown the whole family and live in a bungalow in the middle of nowhere on ma own.

Ah wonder how I'm gonnae feelin' by the end o' the year? Even the thought o' ma next hospital appointment feels quite dauntin'. In that ah don't know what everybuddy else's expectations are. Mine huv'nae exactly been high or low.

Will ah finally get the freedom ah hoped for when ah initially went in for the surgery, y'know?

Ah also feel that ah need tae get ma life in order. But ma family seem unwilling to help in that regard. Like they don't want things to change for me, or at least ma mum doesnae want me to huv any control over ma life.

Ma family don't seem as willing to help me, as I am to try n' help them.
Don't know what that says aboot me or them? :idontknow:

Graeme1988 said:

Ma family don't seem as willing to help me, as I am to try n' help them.

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Occasionally it's good to give people a taste of their own medicine , god I love this idiom.

Jungle said:

Occasionally it's good to give people a taste of their own medicine , god I love this idiom.

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Is it? Because it's never workout fur me. Cuz whenever ah do that and treat them as they treat me, they don't like it. They accuse me o' being a selfish b@$%@*! and a c*%! - along with any other guilt inducing tactic ye cun name.

Then frown at me, aw narrow-eyed n' ragin' when ah stand ma ground.

Just pisses me off that they accuse me of being lazy, yet it's always me who has to talk them intae doing stuff for me. Though, they always let me down. Whereas I'm exacted to be at the beck and call.

Ma family don't seem to like the fact ah do things on ma terms. Or the fact that ah keep to maself. Or they don't seem to understand the mean of the word "No". Strange how they refuse to do summit for it seemingly justified cause they're wimmin. Same doesnae seem to apply when yer man, does it? :thumbdown:

Gonnae try and get ma electric guitar and laptop setup done soon. Possibly for recording, or just so ah cun start playin' again. Just to gimme summit to do instead of sittin' here on the laptop watchin' movies and stuff. As well as watchin' the telly aw the time.

Y'know, at least, it'd gimme a summit productive to do. A sense o' purpose.

Graeme1988 said:

Gonnae try and get ma electric guitar and laptop setup done soon. Possibly for recording, or just so ah cun start playin' again. Just to gimme summit to do instead of sittin' here on the laptop watchin' movies and stuff. As well as watchin' the telly aw the time.

Y'know, at least, it'd gimme a summit productive to do. A sense o' purpose.

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Why not just get out your guitar, tune it up, and start playing? If you haven't practiced in a while, you probably won't want to record the first stuff that comes out anyway. It always takes a while to polish off the rust.

I get the feeling that you're a lot like me in some ways, more a planner than a doer. When I get an idea to do something, instead of just doing it, I start by making notes and lists: stuff I'll need to do first, stuff I'll need to get, all the little steps and details. The planning becomes so complicated that it stops me cold and I never get around to doing what I wanted to do in the first place. Sound familiar?

Maybe I've got you all wrong, and if so, feel free to tell me where to go. My guess, though, is that if you take the direct approach and just do what you want to do, you'll get a lot more satisfaction out of it a lot sooner. Also, once you start playing again, you may find that simple pleasure increases your motivation to delve into the more complicated tech stuff so you'll get to that sooner as well.

Start with the simple and work toward the more complex. Don't let the end stand between you and the beginning.

GraybeardGhost said:

Why not just get out your guitar, tune it up, and start playing?

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Ye mean, unplugged? Aye, ah suppose ah should do that once ah get time.

GraybeardGhost said:

If you haven't practiced in a while, you probably won't want to record the first stuff that comes out anyway. It always takes a while to polish off the rust.

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No, no... Though, ah might demo some ideas ah came up with years that ah can still recall. Just to see if they sound any good, and worth makin' intae songs at some point.

But recording isn't going to happen unless I'm certain about it. Plus. the software I looking to get can act as an amplifer and guitar pedalboard. So, at least, it saves a lotta money on latter of those things.

GraybeardGhost said:

I get the feeling that you're a lot like me in some ways, more a planner than a doer. When I get an idea to do something, instead of just doing it, I start by making notes and lists: stuff I'll need to do first, stuff I'll need to get, all the little steps and details. The planning becomes so complicated that it stops me cold and I never get round to doing what I wanted to do in the first place. Sound familiar?

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A wee bit. But ah do like to following things through, though. Tend to feel disappointed and lazy, if all ah do is talkin' about doin' summit, y'know?

As for the list thing, ah don't tend to be that organised. And I'm not yin for overly complicated ideas, either.

GraybeardGhost said:

Maybe I've got you all wrong, and if so, feel free to tell me where to go. My guess, though, is that if you take the direct approach and just do what you want to do, you'll get a lot more satisfaction out of it a lot sooner. Also, once you start playing again, you may find that simple pleasure increases your motivation to delve into the more complicated tech stuff so you'll get to that sooner as well.

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Yeah, that's my main reason for starting to play again. As for the more tech side of things. I've downloaded a few books as PDF files and video tutorials about the recording and mixing side o' things. Just so ah huv more than yin point of reference.

Start with the simple and work toward the more complex. Don't let the end stand between you and the beginning.[/QUOTE]

Exactly! Though, as ye said, work toward to the more complex stuff. For the moment I'm just focusing on gettin' ma laptop setup to play ma guitar through. So ah cun start playin' again. And go from there...

Get back intae enjoyin' playin' the guitar, then the creativity should flow, hopefully? :question: See I can still remember those random guitar riffs ah used play when ah got bored of playin' covers.

The recording/mixing side is more nitpicky anyway. Plus, would probably require a MIDI keyboard. Plus, you'll know ah've started recordin' when ah sign up to SoundCloud.

And ah've been get some great advice from ma sister's step-brother about the whole recording setup. Enough so ah huv idea of what to do. And he's suggested I upload summit - be an audio file or video o' me playin' ma guitar, just so he can hear me playin' the guitar. Though, only when ah feel confident enough in ma playin'.

Would ma uptight family'll take offense at this, or see the funny if ah got this poster and put on the outside o' ma bedroom door? :thinking: :bigsmile:
Still gonnae get it, like, cause it suits me to a T.

Just month to go til the Edinburgh Fringe festival. And who doesnae like hearin' bagpipes durin' the day, eh?


Ah've got tickets for 3 stand-up comedy shows on the first day o' the festival this year. And I'm kinda nervous aboot gettin' recognised by all 3 comedians I'm going to see that day. Since ah actually talked to yin o' them before their show last year. Though, ah felt kinda nervous and star-struck as per usual. :shyness: And with the other 2 comics, ah wus sittin' the front row of their previous shows, laughin' to the point o' tears.

Re: This is funny
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-LyFMCIpok

Here's the transcript (Full Translation into English)

What do you think of that, Mr. Pajama-Wearing = Insult to his clothes
Basket-Face = Insult to his hat
Slipper-Wielding = insult to his shoes
Clype-Dreep-Bachle = From the gutter / Out of it / at his last straw - Old / worn out
Gether-Uping-Blate-Maw = Mommy's Boy
Bleathering = Speaking a load of crap
Gomeril = Dog
Jessie = Pansy / Sissy / Girl
Oaf-Looking = Look like a retard
Scooner = A half pint aka short man
Nyaff = Out of date
Plookie = Dumbass / stupid looking
Shan = person who speaks and comes from an ethnic minority
Milk-Drinking = P*ssy / Guy who can't handle his drink
Soy-Faced Shilpit = Insulting him as an asian stereotype
Mim-Moothed = Small speaker (not big with his words / speaks submissively)
Sniveling = Complainer / Moans about stuff
Worm-Eyed = Small minded / Can't see for heck
Hotten-Blaugh = Waste of space
Vile-Stoochie = Dirty / Unclean
Cally-Breek-Tattie = Extremely Lazy / Can't lift a finger

:bigsmile:

theslowesthand said:

Here's the transcript (Full Translation into English)

What do you think of that, Mr. Pajama-Wearing = Insult to his clothes
Basket-Face = Insult to his hat
Slipper-Wielding = insult to his shoes
Clype-Dreep-Bachle = From the gutter / Out of it / at his last straw - Old / worn out
Gether-Uping-Blate-Maw = Mommy's Boy
Bleathering = Speaking a load of crap
Gomeril = Dog
Jessie = Pansy / Sissy / Girl
Oaf-Looking = Look like a retard
Scooner = A half pint aka short man
Nyaff = Out of date
Plookie = Dumbass / stupid looking
Shan = person who speaks and comes from an ethnic minority
Milk-Drinking = P*ssy / Guy who can't handle his drink
Soy-Faced Shilpit = Insulting him as an asian stereotype
Mim-Moothed = Small speaker (not big with his words / speaks submissively)
Sniveling = Complainer / Moans about stuff
Worm-Eyed = Small minded / Can't see for heck
Hotten-Blaugh = Waste of space
Vile-Stoochie = Dirty / Unclean
Cally-Breek-Tattie = Extremely Lazy / Can't lift a finger

:bigsmile:

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* These are the only genuine Scottish words, that ah recognise from that full translation Yer ears must better than mine, cause ah couldnae do a full English translation and make it that accurate. :thumbup:

Though, thanks fur makin' aware o' how funny Samurai Jack is. Ah kinda dismissed it due to the animation style during its initial run. But ah hear recently it's gettin' brought back for a new series this year by the creator of the show. Genndy Tartakovsky.