Personality-less

gosadness

New member
Hi guys,

I was just wondering if anyone else has the same problem as me.

I guess my self-doubt tends to make me eager to be accepted, to please, be agreeable and sorta mould myself to mirror the person I'm with. As a result I feel like I am a different person around different cliques of people. I feel ashamed that after more than 20 years of living I have not developed my own personality.
 

chris420

Well-known member
I think most people adapt their personality around different groups of people though,. it's all part of the social game. Actually it has been suggested that we don't actually possess one 'true' personality, but many different identity constructs depending on different situations/people.

Self doubt or depression does not =no personality but that you aren't expressing it properly. Being true to yourself can allow your personality to flourish.. but with SA and our oversensitivity to rejection etc. it's not easy.
 
I don't have a true personality either. Well, I know I have one somewhere but I can't let people see me. Know one knows me, no one really knows me at all. I just act very boring around people, like a brick, or a robot just giving responses when I have to and making them as general as possible. I want my own personality.
 

4seasons

Well-known member
Psychedelicious said:
I don't have a true personality either. Well, I know I have one somewhere but I can't let people see me. Know one knows me, no one really knows me at all. I just act very boring around people, like a brick, or a robot just giving responses when I have to and making them as general as possible. I want my own personality.
In the chat your personality sticks out for sure, you have a great personality from what I can. You just need to learn how to express it in everyday situations.

I don't exactly mimic other people personality but I'm pretty boring. People always tell me I look depressed and when I talk I'm so mon-toned. Its like I'm a zombie haha.
 
Social Anxiety can make it seem like you don't have a personality, because you never get to let it out. But I'm pretty sure you have one...
 

recluse

Well-known member
I feel like i am a really unfriendly person because i can sometimes act cold and aloof even though i know in my heart that i wan't to be friendly, it's just that i am so afraid of people i sort of try and ignore them and pretend i haven't seen them, i guess this is all part of avoidant personality disorder. Even though some people have said that i have a nice personality i feel that i am not truly nice and that i am just trying to get people to accept me. Being too nice is bad though and i've had people walk over me in the past, so now i try to be more nasty :twisted:
 

tpdarlo

Well-known member
I have the same problem. It's not that you don't have a personality, it's just that you're not expressing it because of a fear of your personality being judged. I express my true personality to only a few people, generally those who are shy themselves.
 
ya i can agree with whats written here for my life as well. I have had people describe me as the kid wiht no personality. It does rather hurt but i never let m it bring me down too much. i only actually have a personality when someone really tries to get to know me, which is really rare, and i finally trust them. my roommate keeps telling people that i may just seem really quiet but I am awesome to be around when i trust them. I don't know how true this is but it kinda tends to have people treat me like an animal waiting for a trick of some kind. i would certainly just try and avoid all negative thoughts about those around you, im well aware this is one of the hardest things to do for the majority of us, and realize you don't have to please other people. I certainly am not always able to do this in my life but I look at it this way, if this person doesn't like me for who i really am, the few times im able to show them, then why would i want them to like me for a fake personality. i would rather be lonely then a complete fake. i know this is certainly my own opinion and not even something I completely live by and find myself altering my personality all the time. Keep working at it and even if it is as tiny steps rather than big leaps, eventually the successes will come. Good luck with this situation and just realize you certainly are not alone in this fight!
 
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