Joined: Jun 07, 2007 Posts: 38 Location: California
Posted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 9:29 pm Post subject:
I wish women could be more compassionate. If they see a shy guy, go and talk to him and be reassuring to him that they don't think badly of him. If the non-shy people are so adept at socializing, they should be able to handle shy people-- don't put all the pressure on the shy people to be the social ones, help ease them into that role.
17 and never had a boyfriend. There's a reason for it: no, I'm not monstrously ugly. I'm not even dull or stupid. Or anything. The reason is that I am a disaster. I'm confusing. I am a rollercoaster of emotion and I can't communicate. There's also a reason for that: I discovered it some time ago and it really did hit me: I don't like myself. At all.
And if you don't like yourself - now, who else should?
You know, there's a boy who actually does like me. He's shy - worse than me. And he wants me. Not that I didn't like him. He's nice, he's beautiful, his alright. But the problem is, I can't, just CAN'T be with him. I find myslef unable to do anything physical with him. And I can't believe he could love me. Because I don't like myself, because I don't find myself lovable.
I'm a 21 year old guy who's never had a girlfriend or been on a date. For awhile I could kind of shrug it off; "Nice guys finish last", ha, ha. But it's starting to become a big concern for me. I hate being this young and worrying that I'll always be alone. At the same time, I'm not giving up. I'm staying in good shape with exercise, and I'm trying to groom myself better. For a long time I didn't bother to comb my hair or worry much about what I was wearing (I wore a lot of plaid as kind of an anti-fashion statement). I'm also thinking of trading my big dorky glasses in for some contacts. I've actually gotten some compliments, so I figure any advantage I can find I need to grab hold of.
In what time I have left at college I really want to make an honest attempt to become less isolated. I don't know if anything will happen, but I have to try. We have to keep fighting, you know. Don't give up. I imagine having someone to love and hold and talk to must be the most beautiful thing in the world. So I never lose sight of that, and I try as hard as I can not to feel sorry for myself no matter how debilitating anxiety can be. At the same time, I've never really had much opportunity or felt like I was in the position to ask a girl out. I mostly have just felt invisible.
And if you don't like yourself - now, who else should?
Well, maybe you have characteristics that you yourself don't like, but other people do...
That's right. Maybe it's more like: If you don't like yourself, how can you like anyone else. Or maybe not. It's just that I found myself recently genuinely shocked when I realized that I am loved by people. It felt like, oh, there must be some mistake, wait till they discover how disastrous I really am.
17 and never had a boyfriend. There's a reason for it: no, I'm not monstrously ugly. I'm not even dull or stupid. Or anything. The reason is that I am a disaster. I'm confusing. I am a rollercoaster of emotion and I can't communicate. There's also a reason for that: I discovered it some time ago and it really did hit me: I don't like myself. At all.
And if you don't like yourself - now, who else should?
You know, there's a boy who actually does like me. He's shy - worse than me. And he wants me. Not that I didn't like him. He's nice, he's beautiful, his alright. But the problem is, I can't, just CAN'T be with him. I find myslef unable to do anything physical with him. And I can't believe he could love me. Because I don't like myself, because I don't find myself lovable.
I'm not that bad but at basketball the other week I couldn't even put the goal posts of the previous group down.
Then I couldn't even talk properly a few weeks before that, someone made fun of me.
yet I malloted him when the playing got going, well ever so slightly.
So the morales of this story is accept yourself for the way you are now and find somehtign your good at, somehting you are strong in soemthing where when doing that your are strong then have a crack at it.
Joined: Oct 13, 2007 Posts: 435 Location: 20-f-u.s.
Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2007 7:31 pm Post subject:
ok, i HATE admitting it, but i have not had a boyfriend. i guess "technically" i did for a very short period of time, but it REALLLY does not count.
Guys have been interested in me, and ive liked boys since i was in like 2nd grade, lol. but ive just always been too shy and awkward to do anything about it. i honestly just feel like it would be uncomfortable for me to be that close with someone. im a loner and i just dont like people all that much, and im guessing its cause of the experiences ive had with them. but just thinking of having to be around a guy for most of the day and him always calling me wanting to hang out and stuff, just seems weird.
I've never had a boyfriend. I have plenty of friends but no actual boyfriend.
When I was in middle school it was because I did not fit in with the other girls (aka I did not have the right look).
In high school, it was because I did not want to bring a guy home because unlike most people I know my parents would not allow us to have some semblance of privacy.
In college, it was because I was ashamed of where I lived.
Afterwards it was because I really dread having to explain this to a potential date .
The only effect I have had of falling in love is jealousy.
_________________ Stop making kids.
Compulsory sterilization is good.
More security. Less freedom.
The word "cowardly" is often used as another word for effectivly.
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