Write ur goals/dreams stories of good past times..

allieaust · Newbie User Joined: Jun 30, 2007 Posts: 30

Just wondering what goals people have?

I think well if i wasnt crippled by social phobia and bdd then i would....

and that if i was considered not ugly i would...

My goal at the moment is to try and get my self esteem - for which i had some / a little awhile back and than things happened and i went way down hill again.

My goal is to get my fitness in again -
as at home i would walk up to and over 11 km a day as my therapy and loved the feel of being able to feel good, proud and unique- this was at home in a country town -full of hills- it made me feel very strong in myself and and able to wear clothes that werent baggy for once ( not that i was really overweight tho). I am a vegan also and was eating mainly raw veges and some cooked for tea plus my staples ( tempeh, lentils etc). I would not eat any packet foods at all and i felt absolutley great - in control and ready to take on the world ..

i felt so refreshed and clean - it's hard to describe but i was so healthy and proud of myself. But things changed when i was told i looked anorexic, sick, pale and malnourished- for which was not true although i wasnt eating much out of nerves because i was taking a huge leap in my life at the time but being so much into nutrition and taking all the super foods and beyond.. i thought i looked great, that i was glowing with health beacuse that is how i felt.

So now since moving to this new place in a suburb - in a city where there are people around - i get anxious and have gone and eaen things i would normally never eat at all and feel so yucky - i have all this mucus coming out from my mouth and nose constantly and my fitness is going , my skin is looking bad and i dont have a spring in my step, i dont feel good to get dressed anymore..

Yet i want to feel like i did as it was what gave me confidence and i felt good a little about my appearance.. yet my friend a guy will tell me i am unnattractive and sickly looking if i go bacl o my healthy ways - so i feel hopeless- i dont feel good now and know what i can do to feel good yet ..

I have alot of pressure on me to get out and try to achieve something - to work, study - that is why i moved into the city but i cant do any of this unless i feel good about myself and at a time in when i did - i know i can again.. Confused

AquariusOutkast · Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 5:35 am Post subject:

Hey allieaust! Did you watch Dr.Phil? We had an earthquake here at 8:04 so the show was disrubted by news brodcast. Anyways, My goal is to find peace with myself. Growing up I was always self concious about my appearance but I never thought that it was a serious problem. When you are young everyone goes through that stage where they are insecure about themselves. Now I realize that this is a serious illness and it is not normal. BDD has taken control of my life , but slowly Im starting to accept that I am who I am. I was born this way, I am a human being like everyone else. I am no different, just that some people were blessed with better genes. Because I dont love myself, I cant be in a serious relationship or function properly like a normal person. Even though I had good friends, I always had my guard up. People dont know about my condition. They see me as confident, maybe a little rude and cold at times. But that is just a front, deep inside Im so insecure and so frustrated because I could never show my true self to the people I love. I would just lash out at them. Sometimes I would feel good about myself, feel confident and then the next moment I'll just become really depressed.
Im just really messed up in the head. Sometimes I don't even understand myself. Anyways, sorry I got carried away..hehe. My goal is to love myself, so that I can learn to trust and love again. Get married and have a little mini me and give him/her all the love and care that I never recieved as a child.

_________________
"What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in 2 bodies."

dottie · Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:30 am Post subject:

hey aq, i'm in the bay, too! i was so pissed they interrupted our show! they had all those callers call in to say that they felt it. BFD!!! hey- it should rerun in a few days. at 3pm they always show reruns from the previous week. anyways, i really relate with what you just posted about lashing out.

_________________
"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieive greatly." -Robert F. Kennedy

allieaust · Newbie User Joined: Jun 30, 2007 Posts: 30

Hey guys, sorry to hear about an earthquake of all things Shocked

not too serious i hope!!!! Confused

Been on the Dr Phil site and you can read the transcripts about the bdd episodes.. unfortunatley you have to purchase episodes to be able to download them though - unlike Oprah..

On You Tube you can type in bdd and there is quite a bit on it - Razz

SocialRetahd · Expert User Joined: Dec 02, 2006 Posts: 762

to die in the next 6 months.