Despair

Doomed2Die · Posted: Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:03 pm Post subject: Despair

Ok I know nothing of poetry or the like, I found I could turn these awful and negative thoughts into some sort of outlet if I felt awake enough one night during a bout of insomnia. Please comment and criticize and let it be known I have never looked into such wordplay and its my first try.

It holds him nightly
Preventing him from moving
Strangling
Choking
Drowning

Unrelenting it brings him down and lashes out with fury
Slashing
Cutting
Shredding and wounding

Piercing the soul and corrupting the conscious
No holds barred and by no rules bound
The scythe has been raised and down it goes
Reaping the fruits it has slowly growed

He writhes in pain, he weeps he cries
He wears it out It sears and lies
He hears a screech, it stays its hand

The abomination feasts, absorbing the thoughts, consuming the mind
It does not stop intill its greed is sated, savouring what it has found.

Eventually agony ends, the soul-grip lessens
He picks himself self up brittle and Weakened
trying in vain and searching for life
He lunges for warmth and yet its touch is chilled
Dreams are broken and there is nothing left to yeild

He see’s through tears and feels through hate
His demeanour is bitter and his visage is angst
The slience so loud and the blood so cold
It promises death and venom untold.

The dead man walks
He never changes he never wishes
Hope is always there however
And patiently the demon fishes.

He knows that it knows
Every whim, every haven
Finding no love, no pride no passion
The beast can be starved

So it allows this to happen
Happiness friendship and joy
Building apon the false prospect of progress.

A slip
A failure
Time stops just a bit
The fiend pounces and catches him Bringing forth the terror, its favoured whip.

Shattered delusions
The cycle begins anew
Torment eternal and longing resolute.

It basks in the victory
Proud and horrible
Planning of banquests to come and pleasures to seek
More fuel to devour and spirit to keep.

For indeed, this is the Way of despair.
The arch devil of sleep.

de-vin · Newbie User Joined: Nov 01, 2007 Posts: 81

Egar Allen Poe meets Stephen King lol...I think with your word style you'd be very good at writing stories...good vocabulary and imaginative...but it doesn't flow like a poem, it read like a story for some reason...