Menu
· Home
· What is it?
· The Symptoms
· Treatment
· Diagnostic
· Causes
 
· Forums
· PhotoAlbum
· Chat
· Noticeboard
· Personal Stories
· Web Links
· Surveys
· Register
· Feedback
Login/Registration

Anonymous 103 guests
Members 31 members

Register!
Get instant access to our mini
messenger and post
comments on the forum.
Click here!

Nickname

Password

Survey
Who do you live with?

I live Alone
With my parents
With my partner
With my housemates
Other



Results
Polls

Votes: 213
Comments: 111
Last Personal Stories
To give hope (Chris)
Why not you? (FEIBUMBLEBEE)
Understanding Social Phobia (Live another Day)
Terrified of everything (chelsea x)
therapy matters (needed help)
Overcoming and Recovering "Social Phobia" (Jessica)
Held back by Fear (Cass)
Social Phobia World :: View topic - Has shyness ever made you turn down a woman who wanted you?
  Forum FAQForum FAQ    SearchSearch     ProfileProfile    Private messagesPrivate messages   Log inLog in 
Has shyness ever made you turn down a woman who wanted you?
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Social Phobia World Forum Index -> Shyness Forum
Author Message
italia2007
Newbie User
Newbie User


Joined: Nov 04, 2007
Posts: 9

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 6:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i ALWAYS have my gaurd up if i suspect the girl is interested, in this respect though, i liked wat i saw "physically" (with this girl) and i guess i gave that off cuz she started liking me, which i normally try to avoid.

Back to top
View user's profile ::
jayo
Intermediate User
Intermediate User


Joined: Jun 30, 2006
Posts: 117
Location: Ireland

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 6:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This always happens to me.
Now just the fear of talking to the woman, but the fear of going for a coffee, talking about personal issues, previous partners (!), friends, social life and so on.

Then you'd have to meet her friends and try to explain that years of anxiety have left you an emotionally crippled wreck.

How difficult would all of that be?


_________________
Whether you think you can or you can't, you're probably right
Back to top
View user's profile ::
SocialRetahd
Expert User
Expert User


Joined: Dec 02, 2006
Posts: 762

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 6:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

recluse wrote:
I've never had girls being attracted to me...Well not obviously attracted to me, but i seem to have this sign on me saying ''Keep away from me girls!'' because that what it feels like. I feel i have no charisma o'r good looks and body which would make girls be attracted to me. Oh well! Life sucks Sad


In america, girls are sluttier.

Back to top
View user's profile ::
steviegerrard489
Intermediate User
Intermediate User


Joined: Aug 04, 2006
Posts: 120

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 7:27 pm    Post subject: Re: Has shyness ever made you turn down a woman who wanted y Reply with quote

italia2007 wrote:
Does anyone experience symptoms when they are in the presence of a girl they are really attracted to?

Knowing you are are truly infatuated with her and have to see her everyday but she thinks you are not interested now cuz when a friend surprisingly approached you about her...you just said "No...not interested!" because of fear she won't except the real you and low self esteem!!!!

Any and all replies will be appreciated Smile thanks!


Join the club mate, join the club! This has happened to me dozens of times. However, part of the reason nothing ever happens is because I lack self belief and assume that I must be imagining the girl's interest.

You are lucky that there are some people who can tell you that this girl is genuinely interested. When I have tried asking the friends of these girls I get nothing, no feedback at all, despite the fact I know that they talk about all the guys in the office (ie checking them out, saying which ones are hot/not etc)! Believe me, not being talked about is worse than being talked about.

The other day a girl in my office probed me for information as to whether I was interested in any of the women in the office. I'm not sure if she was trying to get info for the womens secret chats they have.

I think you need to find a moment to talk to this girl but don't mention anything that has gone before. Just go to the coffee machine when she does and make general chit-chat. Maybe you could go for a walk during your lunch break.

I'd concentrate on trying to be friends first. Easier said than done..

Back to top
View user's profile ::
SocialRetahd
Expert User
Expert User


Joined: Dec 02, 2006
Posts: 762

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 7:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

...



Last edited by SocialRetahd on Sun Nov 04, 2007 8:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
View user's profile ::
steviegerrard489
Intermediate User
Intermediate User


Joined: Aug 04, 2006
Posts: 120

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 7:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

recluse wrote:
I've never had girls being attracted to me...Well not obviously attracted to me, but i seem to have this sign on me saying ''Keep away from me girls!'' because that what it feels like. I feel i have no charisma o'r good looks and body which would make girls be attracted to me. Oh well! Life sucks Sad


Maybe you could start at the gym...

Perhaps look at the guys who get girls, wear clothes like they do (if you aren' t already).

Get a decent haircut? (again, I don't know you so this may not apply!)

I did these things about 7 or 8 years ago. It helped in the attractiveness stakes for sure...

Unfortunately, I'm still struggling to find any charisma!!

Back to top
View user's profile ::
recluse
Elite User
Elite User


Joined: Aug 17, 2007
Posts: 1328
Location: Wales, UK

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2007 7:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

SocialRetahd wrote:
recluse wrote:
I've never had girls being attracted to me...Well not obviously attracted to me, but i seem to have this sign on me saying ''Keep away from me girls!'' because that what it feels like. I feel i have no charisma o'r good looks and body which would make girls be attracted to me. Oh well! Life sucks Sad


In america, girls are sluttier.


You are generalizing there, i mean there are slutty girls wherether you go in the world.

Back to top
View user's profile ::
jamez
Intermediate User
Intermediate User


Joined: Nov 21, 2005
Posts: 270
Location: Sydney, Oz

PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 3:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No, I've never really turned down a girl except maybe one but I was really into her. But I've lost a lot of opportunities I guess in the past.

Back to top
View user's profile ::
AnxiousGuy
Newbie User
Newbie User


Joined: Nov 08, 2007
Posts: 28

PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 5:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ho hum...this is my very first post today as I just registered here moments ago. I can relate to everyone on this thread except the guys who feel women aren't interested in you. Most times it can be difficult to read a girl's subtle messages. unless she tells you straight out..."Hey, leave me alone". How do you know she isn't interested in you unless you strike up a conversation.
But, thats why we're here cause the nervousness and all that stuff is just overwhelming. I know, believe me! I'm a very good looking man and yet everyone has this misconception that its a cakewalk for us guys. I've avoided beautiful girls I knew were interested in me but I just couldn't control the heart thumping nervousness. Gads! Mad i've tried baby steps and try to come off as real smooth and then a tightness in my chest and the moment she senses my nervousness its a turn off for them cause then they feel awkward.
Yada, yada, yada. Whats a guy to do, right? I think you can get by with shyness around a girl if your still in grade school but society tells us that its the man's job to make the girl feel comfortable first and if you can't do that then you've got problems. I love women but they want to know their in the presence of a man who can control his emotions. this was long for a first post. I had to get this off my chest,
And of course, thats why we're all here, right! Wink

Back to top
View user's profile ::
bella1968
Newbie User
Newbie User


Joined: Nov 07, 2007
Posts: 18

PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 7:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Did you just give up then? Didn't you ever want to talk to her, tell her the truth and let her be the judge? It might have made a difference AnxiousGuy Very Happy

Back to top
View user's profile ::
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Social Phobia World Forum Index -> Shyness Forum All times are GMT
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next
Page 2 of 5

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum

Powered by phpBB 2.0.10 © 2001 phpBB Group
phpBB port v2.1 based on Tom Nitzschner's phpbb2.0.6 upgraded to phpBB 2.0.4 standalone was developed and tested by:
ArtificialIntel, ChatServ, mikem,
sixonetonoffun and Paul Laudanski (aka Zhen-Xjell).

Version 2.1 by Nuke Cops © 2003 http://www.nukecops.com

Forums ©

Copyright © 2007 by Social Phobia World.com. All Rights Reserved.