Severe Agoraphobia

Broken_Paladin · Newbie User Joined: Jan 11, 2008 Posts: 3

I have been off work for about month and a half now. I have severe anxiety and severe agoraphobia. When i leave the house for any period of time i feel full of rage and terror. It feels like someone is watching me at all times, the longer i stay out the worse it gets, as well as the anger and terror build. I have have severe panic attacks that cause me to shake and be unable to control my limbs. Afterwards i feel exhausted and filled with so much rage i have to get back into my house or the rage will take me and I'll lose it. I have nightmares for the past few weeks of me dying or i see myself rotting/melting several times waking me up at all hours of the night. As well having a panic attack in my sleep waking me up. Im on 20 mg lexapro and 10 mg Buspar, i also take 10mg clonzapam to calm myself down, but it doesn't help for an hour or more. I can't stand for people to touch me or things that i will be putting on my body (coat, clothes,etc) it feels like they are infecting it and i can't concentrate on anything else until they stop. When i look at people sometimes it feels like i can see them rotting. The only place i feel safe is at my home because i know that every door & window is locked, i know where every creaky board is so i listen to make sure no one is inside. I been going to anxiety therapy and taking my meds but im just getting worse, Im unable to work and live alone. I have no family or friends just myself. I have been trying to go out little by little, but alas it has been getting worse. Just need some people to talk to that understand.
My girlfriend is about ready to leave me because she wont understand this. Has anyone have this that severe? Any advice?

sabbath92002 · Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 11:05 am Post subject: Re: Severe Agoraphobia

Broken_Paladin · Newbie User Joined: Jan 11, 2008 Posts: 3

Hmm thanx I'll look into it, im almost to the end where i can't go outside anymore so might help.

Gabby44 · Newbie User Joined: Jan 20, 2008 Posts: 3

Hi like you I"m a newbie also.I like you also have Agoraphobia w/ severe panic and anxiety disorder. I also have post traumatic stress disorder along with a few more things. I am on Lexapro 20 mg. Tranxene and Xanax for my anxiety and panic.
I started going to therapy when I was about 23 yrs. old trying to figure out why I could not socialize with people, I always was trying to figure out what they thought of me and usually it was negative thoughts.And more than likely they were not thinking that at all, but they could sense my uncomfortableness and then they would be uncomfortable, and would usually exit my presense quickly.I also would not go to the grocery store, because I was afraid some one would speak to me or look at me.When I did go to the grocery store if some one was coming up or down my isle I would turn my buggy around and go to a isle where no one was. I HATED IT
I am 44 yrs. old now and with medication and therapy I am finally !learning who I am. I am overcoming it, but it has been a long hard battle.
I told my sister once that I was so tired of constantly fighting myself just to stay sane.
Now that I am overcoming this disorder or at least getting it under control, I have learned to like myself which was the biggest and most important step I had to learn.It is amazing at how much I am finally enjoying life and people.I have learned that I LOVE PEOPLE! And People actually like me too.
My point I am trying to make is to NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!! Keep pushing and you will find your self and will like yourself,, which is sooo important.

Gabby44 · Newbie User Joined: Jan 20, 2008 Posts: 3

I do hope things go well for you, and I do understand how you feel. If there is anything I can do just give me a holler.

Broken_Paladin · Newbie User Joined: Jan 11, 2008 Posts: 3

Thank you Gabby i really appreciate your advice.

lynn123 · Newbie User Joined: Jan 22, 2008 Posts: 2

hi, im also a newbie! Yes I have most definitely had these symptoms very severe too, i haven't left my home in 3 and a half years, due to ocd and agoraphobia, i dont take any meds for it. I really want to leave my home so bad but these compulsive thoughts and anxiety prevent me from doing so. I have no idea what to do.
Sorry I wasn't much help but just need to tell you that you are definitely not alone with this, and I wish you the best of luck! Stay safe and take care x