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Social Phobia World :: View topic - Should I switch schools?
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Should I switch schools?
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Homepickle
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Joined: Jan 15, 2008
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 3:36 am    Post subject: Should I switch schools? Reply with quote

I'm 15 years old and I'm in 9th grade. I have been bullied HARSHLY since 5th grade. The first few months of high school were great, I could wake up and not be worried about somebody messing with me. But now the bullying is starting up again. Poeple see me as an easy target. My reputation in my school is completely destroyed. I don't think I can manage to be in the same building as these jerks anymore. I spoke to my counselors about it but the only thing they say is "oh, I can talk to them for you". What have I ever done? I am a nice, caring person and am now afraid to show that personality. What have I done to deserve this?

I am now a Anti-social, stressed, depressed teenager. My youth has been completely ruined by a bunch of ignorant poeple. Back on topic, do you think I should change schools? Start over with a new reputation? If so, what kind of school should I look into going to?

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SleepingBeauty
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Joined: Oct 13, 2007
Posts: 446
Location: 20-f-u.s.

PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

thank god i didnt go to a big high school. i went to public school but it had like less then 100 students in it. but i still had a hard time with the people there, but thats just because i went to a crappy school with crappy people.

But anyways, if your counselors or principle dont end up helping the situation then maybe you should try another school. I would really recommend a charter school if there are any near you. Try looking them up online. Iv heard charter schools are A LOT better then normal ones. There smaller and more "one on one" with students. Thats all i can really think of.

im sorry to hear about those jerk kids bullying you. Dont change who you are. the real world like nice caring people. high school just sucks ass cause you have to deal with immature idiots! But i hope things work out for you
Smile

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Butterflies
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Joined: Oct 10, 2007
Posts: 137

PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hello Homepickle - so wrong the way things are for you - sorry about that.

My opinion: I would say make a move ... but on one condition:

Do something about gaining some more confidence - you can get help to build your confidence, self-esteem - start slowly. Make the decision before your move and act on it.

If you don't your problems will always shadow you no matter where you go.

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sabbath92001
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Joined: Oct 14, 2004
Posts: 420
Location: 44/M/Miami, FL

PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 9:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

High school is bogus. I dropped out at 15, took a GED test at 16, and had my A.S. degree at 18. In college no one bothered me. High school seems like a huge waste of time to me.


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RedRibbons
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Joined: Oct 22, 2007
Posts: 429

PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

People are bullies because they can be, because they think it makes them cool. You should try to see where they are coming from. Any bully really has a desire to break down the people who are good, the people who don't deserve it.

I think you should stick it through, and know that you are better than them. Do you have friends at your high school? I made a lot of moves in high school, and I can't say it was the best thing. To me, it's just like running away from your problems. If you have friends, I wouldn't switch schools. Because those are the people who are important, NOT the bullies.

Now, if you have no friends and are bullied a tonne, then I would switch schools.

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thor01
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Joined: Jun 09, 2008
Posts: 27

PostPosted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 11:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know how you feel, my school was full of idiots, for the first few years i was verbally abused lots, and in classes people were just messing about, and i had to constantly feel paranoid. The atmosphere was just generaly threatening. the last couple of years werent as bad in that way, but i bet those earlier years have affected me in some way, made me feel less confident when i already wasnt confident. It would be a shame for you to have to move schools because of other idiots, it should be them being kicked out. But sadly it doesnt usualy work like that, as the idiots always sem to be given many chances to stay in school. Im not great on giving advise on this, but i definatley understand your problem, just do what you feel is the right thing to do to solve it, and listen to music that makes you feel better in the meantime, and try envisaging what you'd like to happen. If you ever need to use self defence, you should, maybe i should have done.

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Satine
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Joined: Jul 03, 2008
Posts: 45

PostPosted: Tue Jul 08, 2008 10:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It is a good thing that under it all you have a kind heart and are generally a pleasant person to be around. But you need to begin to build another facet to your personality: learn to bite back.

If somebody attacks you in any way, do the same to them. Don't worry about being 'better' than them or 'stooping down to their level', because we're all neutral human beings at the end of the day. The bullies are simply people who haven't worked out how to treat people yet.

And on your side, there are lessons to learn too: as I said, be stronger with them. Don't let it happen, and fight back. Believe me, counsellors and teachers and even parents don't want to get involved, because it gets too slippery a subject for them to really grasp (teenagers and children being an entirely alient species and all Rolling Eyes )

Once the bullies realise you're not having any of their rubbish, they'll stop piling it onto you.

To answer your question, perhaps a switch of schools would be helpful, but you need to do it in conjunction with the above so as not to repeat the pattern. True, you might not get a repetition, but anything you can do to guard against bullying in future will help you.

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Zappa111
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Joined: May 30, 2008
Posts: 6

PostPosted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have learnt that it is better to go 2 a new place. The world is big.

Just take a nice holiday first, to relax.

Be careful in selecting new friends.

Never reveal weaknesses!! Smile. A lot.

If you seem happy and ready to shrug stuff off people will probably leave you alone.

I know this is hard, but if someone bitches you...smile brightly...this way they will get the message that you see through them and that you love the fact that they want what you have or need you to feel good about themselves. Also smile because life is short.

People who bully you are psychologically unwell. The world is big and there is so much beauty...if these people can only spend time torturing one another...that's really sad.

Be careful with people. They are really dumb. They can easily be intimidated or take things up the wrong way.

I was bullied not by peers...my peers are really cool and sensitive...I was bullied by my lecturer, who threatened and degraded me ( "EWWW...GROSS...LOOK AT YOU!! OH NO, NOT YOU AGAIN...YUCK. and she pulled EVIL faces ). What a piece of work she was, insulting me on my very first day at university. NICE!!

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Helyna
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Joined: May 24, 2008
Posts: 530
Location: Florida

PostPosted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 2:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Butterflies wrote:
My opinion: I would say make a move ... but on one condition:

Do something about gaining some more confidence - you can get help to build your confidence, self-esteem - start slowly. Make the decision before your move and act on it.

If you don't your problems will always shadow you no matter where you go.


I completely agree. Changing schools will help, but it's not a magic cure. I also agree with Zappa111: SMILE. Look confident no matter how you feel. Learn to laugh at yourself so the bullies can't hurt you with teasing (physical bullying, I admit, can be a bit harder to fight against). Learn to believe in yourself. Make a habit of positive self-talk, etc. Take control.

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Satine
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Joined: Jul 03, 2008
Posts: 45

PostPosted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 11:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Helyna wrote:
Changing schools will help, but it's not a magic cure. I also agree with Zappa111: SMILE. Look confident no matter how you feel. Learn to laugh at yourself so the bullies can't hurt you with teasing (physical bullying, I admit, can be a bit harder to fight against). Learn to believe in yourself. Make a habit of positive self-talk, etc. Take control.


Absolutely. Although smiling and talking positively in your own head doesn't feel at all natural at first - it really feels tacky and fake - do it anyway. Gradually it will feel truer... and it becomes truer.


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