Joined: Feb 21, 2008 Posts: 4 Location: New Rochelle, New york
Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 9:56 pm Post subject: Im a very lonely person
Hi. Im an 18 year old guy and I have no friends. when i go to school, it's like I don't exist to anyone. No body talks to me. I have never had a girlfriend. It could be that i don't talk to people because I'm to nervous to talk to people, especially girls. I really want a girlfriend. I'm not asking to find one here because this is not the place for it. All I'm asking for is help and support with my issues. Thank you for listening.
Hey there. I get lonely too, but I've learned to more or less accept and be happy with my aloneness. It's actually a lot nicer than being a social bunny 24/7.
Anywho! about your problem. Do you smile at people? Do you make eye contact? Are you upbeat or do you sulk around the school? Do you exude confidence or insecurity? Considering your situation, it's probably the negative.
If you want to be noticed you need to do things to be noticed. Or you know what, fuck people. Do what you like to do, and if people notice than they do, if they don't than they don't. Pursue things you are interested in. Be your own person, stand up on your own two feet and be happy with you. Naturally, once you are doing things that you enjoy, your confidence will increase, and you will probably get noticed more. You will be doing things you like and you will meet people who have like interests, and it will make it a lot easier to talk to people.
I don't know if any of that sounds off, or weird, but you know. Just be positive. People come and go, friends come and go, they're not everything. You're 18... a lot of guys who are 18 don't have girlfriends. Hell, there are some people who are 30.. 40.. who've never had girlfriends. You're gonna be okay. Just do the things you enjoy doing, and along the way, people will come in and out of your life. Just cause they're not there now, doesn't mean they will never be. And just cause you want them now, doesn't mean you have to have them. Get comfy with being alone. It will help you out a lot.
Hi, I'm friendless and lonely too. I know how you feel.
Do you have have any hobbies you could do in a group, even if you don't feel you could speak to anyone there? I find group music lessons make me feel less lonely even though I'm usually very quiet there. I think if you're doing something you love and the people you're doing it with love it too, the atmosphere can make you feel a lot better, like you're a part of something.
Just a thought but I don't know if it works for everyone.
You're still quite young so I wouldn't worry - people think they should be fixed up with a partner a certain age, but that's jut bs.
Try not to focus so much on wanting a partner - it only put us girls off. Just relax and try and be yourself as much as possible. Join a group and get to know other people, but don't feel you have to be in some huge race to find someone, you've got years and years ahead of you yet.
Primrose said: "you've got years and years ahead of you yet"
Its funny, people use to tell me that exact sentence, my old uni collegues,
they still say it some times they just dont pretend to believe it anymore...
I know exactly how you feel I used to be a total loner and feel really depressed between the ages of 13 and 21 I had no friends. I think that the funny paradox is that the best way to get´a girlfriend is to have sex with girls. Go run through a few prostitutes. At first you probably wont be able to get it up but you will eventually. This will get you over the whole virgin inferiority complex and will help you feel more sexually confident with women.
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