How long have you been single?

Finn · Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 2:51 pm Post subject:

I was going out with my ex for 2 and a half years but since then i've been single for the last 2 years, every guy i've went out with in the last 2 years have only been after one thing from me, starting to think ill end up old and alone

scorpion · Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:07 pm Post subject:

The thing i hate more is whend i am told, you are young, you have lots of time, and another year goes by, and another, and another.
And after 10 years, i am still young, but not so young and people still say the same crap, but whith thath expression on their faces "You are going to die single".
They should just shut up
I made a bet 7 years ago about finding someone, because of thath crap talk, at the time they found it fun, but 7 years later ( sadly) I am wining the bet.
the bet was i would be single after 10 years, 7 have gone by just 3 more to go
I am closer to win
CRAP

Caseums21 · Intermediate User Joined: Jan 06, 2008 Posts: 115

I'm a 23 year old female and I've been single for about 3 years. It honestly doesn't bother me that badly. Probably because the guys around here are not the "boyfriend" type. I did date someone for 3 years and we were engaged. I broke off the engagement but we are still best friends.

Danfalc22 · Newbie User Joined: Nov 17, 2007 Posts: 47

IDKwhatIwant · Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 7:31 am Post subject:

only had 2 relationships.

first was really casual and nice. she knew I was nervous so we joked about everything but we were only 16 and her dad was strict so we kind of just went back to being friends at school. other was when I was 17 going 18 and her parents didnt like me, so we stopped. I moved when I was 18, been single and friendless since. Crying or Very sad

Tab · Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 7:45 am Post subject:

well lets see, im 19 and been single for 19 years. Rolling Eyes

when some one tries to get close to me i push them away i dont know why and i cant explain it.

persian · Newbie User Joined: Apr 12, 2007 Posts: 28

AuroraSky · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:22 am Post subject:

Maybe I can give a little hope here as if I can find a partner anyone can. I dated a bit in college but then almost nothing until I was 33 and I met someone through the website www.social-anxiety.org.uk who was a penpal first for a long time and then we got together, have been for 4 years.

I had so little success with women (well I was too chicken to ask any out, so I never got rejected either I guess!) that I felt very unloveable. My gf has admitted that her first thought when she actually met me was "my, what a big head" - and she didn't mean I was egotistical, literally I have got a large head! Luckily for me she likes hands and thinks my hands and eyes are nice. We had corresponded a lot about lots of things before we got together however I would not recommend this for everyone - I did the same with one other very nice lady I met through match.com and we got on great by e-mail but had no chemistry in person, and felt bad we had invested so much in the relationship without ever meeting first.

So I would say don't give up hope of finding someone who cares about you through online means. You just have to be open to regular people, as I find many shy men are unrealistic about wanting to be with some "hottie" when they just don't have the good looks or personality to attract someone like that, and yet will ignore a perfectly pleasant person and normal-looking person as not being up to their standards.

The one thing I had in my favour is that I express myself better in writing than I would in conversation in a noisy bar or disco. When I e-mailed people I always focused on positive things I would like to do, and my interests in travel and cinema, so I probably created a better impression than someone who just e-mails about how depressing their life was (and mine was pretty lonely at the time, my parents both died in 2001 and my few friends were married and too busy to see me, but I didn't focus on that I focused on a better future instead).

Unfortunately my gf has issues about rejection and abandonment so doesn't always feel reassured that our relationship will last, and I also sometimes worry about being a couple of bad arguments away from a breakup and lonely singlehood again (which is irrational as we only have occasional, minor arguments), so we don't always get all the benefits we should from being in a relationship.

There are two books, "Shy And Single" and "If The Buddha Dated" which I would recommend to any shy person here who doubts if love will ever happen for them, both are easily available from Amazon. Good luck to all the singletons out there Smile

slowmotiondaydream · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:54 am Post subject:

just turned 21 and have been single for the past 21 years

slowmotiondaydream · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:57 am Post subject:

haha that did make me laugh

"If we could see into the future, I think people like us should be terminated shortly after birth."