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Social Phobia World :: View topic - Do you ever cry because of social anxiety?
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Do you ever cry because of social anxiety?
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AngelsTears85
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Joined: Nov 06, 2007
Posts: 107
Location: New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2008 4:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I used to cry a lot...

The one that I remeber the most though is I was invited to a friends 21st, I hadn't seen her in awhile and was told that there was going to be mostly famliy which I had never meet there and a couple of her friends that she had made from her work and things which I also didn't know...I was nervous also because I was embarrsed to see her mum and dad again as they were strangely draged into my mum and dad splitting up...I was feeling good tho as I knew that my best friend was going to be there so that was good, but as I was getting ready I could feel myself start to get worked up and feel myself about to cry I started shaking and trying to not cry which as you most likely know makes it worse, then I started crying and I didn't want to go any more. My mum said I had to at least go and give her her present so I composed myself as best I could and went over to her place and as I was walking up the driveway I strated crying again and her and her mum came out and then I felt like crap that I couldn't even go to her 21st and that her and her mum had seen my crying over something that shouldn't be a big deal...I really regret letting SP get the better of me...I have just recently been invited to her house warming party and am now feaking out about that. I hope it is not a repeat of what happened last time...


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phd_girl
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 7:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

All of the time. Sometimes I cry when I'm anticipating thing I really don't want to do, sometimes I cry when I'm in a situation that's just too much for me, & sometimes I just cry. You're not alone, and definitely not a pussy

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phd_girl
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 7:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

All of the time. Sometimes I cry when I'm anticipating thing I really don't want to do, sometimes I cry when I'm in a situation that's just too much for me, & sometimes I just cry. You're not alone, and definitely not a pussy

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hulkamaniak
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Joined: Mar 16, 2008
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 10:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yep, a day before i signed up to here i did, It was my first day at uni and I couldnt handle it and felt so alone i felt very suicidal and teary in my lecture, i felt so uncomfortable i left, and held it on the whole train ride home, then when i got home my dad noticed something was wrong with me and i tried to pretend nothing was, then broke down crying, first time in yonks. . . . But i guess it happened for a reason because he took me to hospital and im now getting help and now officially know i have SA

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the_green_bastard
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:07 am    Post subject: Re: Do you ever cry because of social anxiety? Reply with quote

shyboy1 wrote:
Do you? I am crying right now actually. Call me a pussy if you must...


I won't call you a pussy, and anyone who does is a pussy.

I have. Sometimes forcefully and desperately... I live in residence, you see, in a town a ways away from anyone I know. I know I could never go out and meet people here, not that I want to... I know who my friends are, and I could never do so anyway without my confidante.

For a time, I couldn't get up and drag myself across campus to class without growing all misty-eyed and hating myself. I wanted to smash a tower window with a cinder block to create a useful portal. I'm over that, but I still feel like I'll never go anywhere socially, save for the proximal luck of my friends' flourishing social lives.



Last edited by the_green_bastard on Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:09 am; edited 1 time in total
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zeroday
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Joined: Jul 30, 2007
Posts: 179
Location: TORONTO, CA

PostPosted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

theres nothing wrong with crying, not even if you're a guy.

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Rainbowstar
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Joined: Mar 25, 2008
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Location: Sydney

PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 10:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi shyboy1,

You are NOT a pussy. It is normal for everyone (male or female) to cry. We all cry when we lose something valuable, when we encounter challenging experiences or when we are hurt. Some people in society expect males to behave a macho manner and not cry because crying is synonymous with weakness. This is an unrealistic expectation as everyone has their weaknesses and strengths. I remember watching Roger Federer cry when he won the Australian Open in 2006. Everyone applauded him when he cried.


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Rainbowstar
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Location: Sydney

PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 11:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

swinnie wrote:
First time on this site, I am crying right now. I have a great job but yesterday my boss asked me to present in front of 20 of my peers with one day's notice.

I really messed up - massive long pause just after the start, made no sense, shook, bushed, spoke too quickly and at least five people commented afterwards on how nervous I was. I think my boss thinks I am a freak.

To top it all off I am in communications! This was the worst day ever. Anyone have some advice?


Hi Swinnie,
I hope you are feeling better. It is important to remember that fear of public speaking is a common fear and everyone feels nervous. I have several suggestions.
- Borrow or buy the book 'Umm... A complete guide to public speaking' by James O'Loughlin. He has good tips on how to handle nerves and he also talks about his own experiences. James O'Loughlin is a popular ABC comedian. He is the host of TV show 'The New Inventors'.
- Practice is the best way to make you feel comfortable when speaking to an audience. I felt nervous when I first started, however, I practised it many times and now I'm more comfortable. You can put a photo which shows a audience as seen by the speaker and put the photo somewhere noticeable (e.g. on the desktop wallpaper, room door etc) and look at the photo everyday. This helps you get used to looking directly at an audience. If you're in a room, practice standing in front of the blackboard or screen in the room, when the room is empty. This also helps you get used to looking at an audience. There are also other ways to practice (e.g. calling up on radio). With practise, you'll become more comfortable. It is similar to driving a car (most of us are anxious when we first drive but we become less anxious the more we practice).


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Danfalc
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Joined: Apr 23, 2005
Posts: 945
Location: United Kingdom

PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 12:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Like someone else said.. i think my supply of tears have run out,i use to cry alot when i was younger but havnt now for years.I lost someone important recently and i didnt even shed a single tear.I physicaly cant laugh either i feel like a robot.

I was braught up with the attitude that men shouldnt cry and got in more trouble with my parents if i dared cry or get upset.But the the op.. were ment to cry.. your deffo not a "pussy" actuay i think it takes more of a man to show his emotions.

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Caseums21
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Joined: Jan 06, 2008
Posts: 115

PostPosted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 1:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have one good cry about once every 2 weeks. Last night I cried but I felt so much better afterwards. Smile

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