I last hung out on the 4th of july. I went out to a party...drunk or very bussed of course. later that night the beer wore off i got some major heart skipping beats and the whole cant breathe thing. it was awful pretending nothing was wrong. I was with my best friend who cant understand how i became agrophobic all a sudden within this year:(.
Last time I had a friend over was....about 6 years ago. I mostly hung out with mutual friends of my siblings who were introduced to me, because i didn't have steady friends of my own.
wow, I thought I was alone in the fact that I haven't had any friends in many years. I used to see them every once in a while...but I haven't in at least 3 years....that sounds pretty drastic. I literally haven't had ANY friends in 3 years. The closest thing has been a girl 3 years younger than me whom I talk to a bit and share artistic ideas with. She say that she considers me a friend, but I'm far too fearful to be a real, decent friend.
I like to think that if I was around people at all I would make friends, since I am semi interesting...maybe. I sometimes think that all it takes is being around a group of people for an extended period of time, so that I get used to them and trust them and give them time to see the real me...
_________________ I wish we could see into the future of peoples lives when they are born. Then we could kill all babies who's going to be bad people. Robbers, bullying kids, murderers etc. Just put a gun at the baby's head.
um.. probably 1 or 2 years ago. I was really nervous... it was a birthday party. the only reason I went was because my sister couldn't go and I had to in her place. they weren't really my friends. I didn't talk to anyone, and I heard girls whispering, "she's so quiet, she hasn't said anything." I HATED it.
=( I never get close enough to anyone to consider them friends.
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