But...everyone already knows I'm shy!

Ky

This is probably the only reason why I'm still shy. I'm confident about myself now (well, more so at least...) and feel quite comfortable talking to strangers and new people in school. The thing I have a problem with is talking to people who already know I'm shy. The people I've ignored in the past because I've never felt 'good enough' to talk to them. I feel like instead of judging me by the way I look, now they will judge me on the fact that I've been shy in the past. I wouldn't know how to answer the question 'why haven't you talked to me before?' or 'Haven't heard from you in a while!' or 'Is that Ky? Since when does she talk?'

Know what I mean? I don't know how to get over this. I feel like it would seem weird if I just randomly talked to someone I knew for 3 years but haven't spoken to before. Any of you guys feel the same way?

bleach

This has been a concern of mine before. i think what you have to do is meet new people. Everyone says first impressions are the most lasting. If they had a negative impression of you at the start (very likely) then they will most likely keep it.

Edith · Intermediate User Joined: Feb 08, 2008 Posts: 110

kristle · Newbie User Joined: Mar 23, 2008 Posts: 10

I know exactly what you mean and I feel the same way.

I remember in elementary thru middle school I was really really quiet and I would barely talk to anyone and then when I started High School idk what happened but I just felt more comfortable talking to people and everyone who knew me before would be like "You actually talk?" or "This is the most I've ever heard you say" Mad

sooo annoying!

Sapphire_Ice28 · Newbie User Joined: Apr 15, 2008 Posts: 7

moodygoo · Newbie User Joined: Sep 03, 2006 Posts: 57

I know what you mean. Does anyone feel like you'll get stuck being shy when you meet someone new? Like if you act really shy first time you meet people get the impression that you don't talk much then they don't want to bother making all the effort, and then instead of gradually getting accustomed to them you just get shyer...

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ka farsken!?!

proudmummy · Newbie User Joined: Apr 15, 2008 Posts: 93

This is something I worry about. What annoys me is this is something i'll never be able to change as people just remember don't they? they remember how you would avoid them. Its embarrassing. I might even have to start a new job, start afresh.

alex29 · Intermediate User Joined: Dec 15, 2007 Posts: 147

yes and i hate it! part of me feels like i have to keep up with their expectations. they expect me to be shy and in order to avoid attention i have to keep being shy Sad

princess_haru · Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 6:28 pm Post subject:

Grr yeah, it's so annoying! If I bump into someone I know and suddenly remember that last time I saw them I was acting really dorky and nervous, then I can't help but act that way again! I start thinking about how they're probably remembering how weird I was the last time they saw me, and that makes me really nervous and starts off a whole new cycle of mumbling and stupid remarks and fidgeting, before I make a crappy excuse and flee (if they haven't done so first, that is!!) Embarassed

Sometimes I wish I could selectively forget stuff and just obliviate certain embarrassing memories. Maybe if I couldn't remember those horrible moments, I'd stop freaking out so much and be a lot more confident... *sigh*

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When you're strange
Faces come out of the rain
When you're strange
No one remembers your name

Diluted_Acid · Posted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:49 am Post subject:

Bro thats exactly what i was thinking during my last year of school (was last year btw) . . .if you feel its too late, my best advice would be get as motivated as you can to do your best and get the marks you want. It pays off and you do definitly reap the benefits. While having your mind on the studies, at school instead of just trying to converse with every group and so forth (whilst feeling anxious), try just holding a good conversation with a few people each day. Maybe first try become that guy who everyone likes to talk to on a one on one scale. Just try keep calm, think positively . . . in fact . . don't think at all, just loosen up, try listen to what their actually saying (it was hard for me to not be self-absorbed back in high) read their facial expressions and let their excitement or fun emotions rub off onto you. It's actually not as hard as you might think. If you decide when to break out of that social phobic shell, try slowly working your way out in high school. Just learn to get a feel for what socialising is like and how to do it (even just with one person). If you further your studies after school, thats when you should try completely break out of that shell. You may meet new people who don't know you. You might be hell shocked at how much girls who don't know you will approach you later on if you further your studies.